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It has been more than a few days since Crane has seem Bexley, she had stopped coming to the manor completely and more often than not was skipping out on her duties as a Guard. The Diviner has been falling deeper and deeper into herself since Crane had forcibly removed her from the Isle. The Dhampir was more than aware that she would have tried to help others until she herself had died. That was something he couldn’t allow, they were friends and thought he might be gruff and blunt at times he lent her what light he did have, more than aware of just how close to darkness she was most days. Both having lost their families at a young age but where as Crane has found the Ailwards and the Isle, Bex had found another family first.
Having checked her place of employment he knew that she wasn’t there since it had been closed, no lights on at all, which meant he was going to have to do more to track her down. In the alleyway he pulled his twin tomahawks from the place they rested on his belt. Casting the rune of pinpoint vision on his tomahawks they glowed a pale sky blue as the power of the rune washed over him and his weapons. The pale sky blue glow lead a path that only he could see and the direction that it head was one he should have realized. Placing the tomahawks back into his belt he crossed them over one another to hold them in place before following the path set out before him.
Reaching her place he knocked more aggressively than necessary on her door since the path ended here so even if she didn’t answer the door he knew she was still within there. “Come on Bex, it’s just me. Which also means if you don’t answer the door, I’ll open it for you and if you want to play the teleportation game you know I’ll find you. So make it easy on us both and just answer the damn door.” He didn’t save her life to watch her spiral, of course he understood how she felt since he’d fallen into himself and compartmentalized in order to deal with the Celestial situation and then again when the Isle fell. However he knew that it had taken him time and a swift kick in the pants in order to move forward but he had done it.
“I’ll sit out here all night and you know it Bex.” He stated as he leaned against the doorframe before beginning to count down, “At one I’m pulling out the tomahawks and kicking this off. Three…..two…” He said slowly giving her time to get to the door.
Shortly after the fall of Skye and the aspects and guards settled themselves into Evermore, Bexley began to look for her own place. It didn’t take long till she was moved out and starting her own shop in Evermore. It was her perfect excuse for her not to be around the group of people that had become a family to her; It was a perfect excuse for her to place space between her and Crane, the one person she refuse to see die. They had all lost so much in the fall of the Isle, but the pain was something she didn't want to face. She couldn’t be around the others mourning with them, trying to convince one another everything was okay, when it wasn’t.
While she had always been a passionate business woman she never thought it would be a way to escape from people she shouldn’t be escaping from. The thought of losing anyone in their dwindling numbers was far to much emotion for the guard. She turned to self remedies to not focus on the worst in life, she placed herself in a routine and only went outside of it when the aspects called upon her for a mission, or events to keep up appearances the best she could. Though her calls to check in became less.
That day was like any other, up working out in her home gym, shower, breakfast and off to her shop Diviner Intervention working for a good part of the day till she found a spell book that she had borrowed for Mal. She flipped through the pages before landing on a summoning spell. She stared at it and looked around the empty shop. Quickly flipping the sign to close, gathering what the spell asked for before she teleported home. She found herself staring at the spell as she laid out black dirt in a ring on her coffee table lighting the candles.
She began to chant the words, over and over again. She needed to go back and stop Crane from pulling her off the Isle, she needed to try and save the Isle and everything could go back to what it use to be. She kept chanting until her nose started to bleed. She groaned in frustration pushing the coffee table over before jumping up to put out the flames. “This is pointless.” she whispered to herself and leaned her head back holding the back of her neck. That was when the aggressive knock came upon her door causing her head to snap around to the door. Hearing Crane voice caused her heart to clench in her chest.
She couldn’t remember the last time they had even spoken, she made it known that night she owe him her life. That night she placed a protection amulet on him, one that matched one around her neck. It was something Mal had taught her to cast. If he was in trouble she could teleport to him, and pay off her life debt. She stood there staring at the door as he spoke, he was right she could run but a big part of her missed him. She moved to the door leaning her back against the wall as he said he would sit out there all night. She couldn’t help the chuckle that passed her lips as he then quickly changed to breaking her door down.
Letting her fingers wrap around the door handle and pulling it open looking to him “You know, maybe you have ADHD, one moment you are sitting out there all night and the next you are breaking down my door. Thank goodness I wasn’t at the store getting dinner or something. You know how much replacing a door cost now a days?” She question him, before opening the door all the way for him to come in “May as well get you out of the cold since you can all this way.” She said as she leaned on the door. “Unless you want me to close the door so you can take out your testosterone filled rage against the defenseless door.”
Crane could quickly go from one extreme to the next, Bex knew that better than anyone, he had the patience to wait outside of her door all night but he honestly didn’t want to. What he wanted was for Bexley to just talk to him like she once had and open the door without threats of breaking doors or staying outside all night. Everything between them seemed to have changed, she thanked him for saving her life and then seemed to have drifted away from him and he hated that because he didn’t understand. They both had done the best that they could on the Isle of Skye and despite the torment and heaviness of guilt which had settled on him he knew the past couldn’t be changed. The only thing they could do now was protect who was left along with the peace they had helped to create within Evermore.
Crane wasn’t one who usually pushed, more often than not he allowed things to happen naturally since that was the order of life but at this point he couldn’t allow anyone else to pull away or leave by choice when they had lost so many by force when Skye fell. “Come on Bex, I can deal with you pushing everyone else away, but not me.” He stated feeling an odd sense of helplessness beginning to set in his chest since he didn’t like whatever weird place they were currently in. They had been close and he considered her one of his best friends since they were similar in many ways but now it was like she just didn’t care and that he couldn’t handle, not right now.
The silence was deafening when he knew she was on the other side of the door, sure she was a Diviner and could easily use a different sort of magic than his runes. However without shielding her location his runes would always be able to find her, especially while he had the amulet she had charmed for him, it was a link that connected them whether she wanted it to or not. “Just talk to me Bex, this isn’t easy on any of us but it doesn’t get any better when one of the few you trust cuts you off.” They had both been untrusting when they came to the Guard, it was pretty obvious they needed guidance and an outlet for the rage and need for vengeance which burned within them. Until they were given a purpose they had been a danger to others because Crane had allowed the darkness in, letting it take hold until he was given a silver lining once more.
As the door opened her gave the Diviner a lopsided grin, “If being ADHD is my biggest issue than I’m doing pretty good. Besides if you didn’t respond to one I figured that you would respond to the other so it was a win-win situation for me.” As she went into the downside of his plan he rolled his eyes, “You act like I didn’t use a little Dhampir skill to see if you were home or not. I would have paid for the door…maybe.” A chuckle left him, “Saying now a days makes up sound really, really old and we’re not really that old.” As she opened the door wider he stepped inside, “I don’t have a testosterone filled rage, I have a, ‘my best friend is acting like I don’t exist’ rage, that’s different. So do you want to tell me why you’re pushing everyone away or are we going to do things the other way while I just stare at you waiting for you to break?”
Bexley was sure it was clear to all of the guards, and the aspects themselves that she was failing in her guard duties. She place a protection amulet around Crane and with in a few weeks after the fall was no longer living under the same roof like she had once. Not many knew her whole story, Crane and Ven were about the only two she trusted enough to know everything. Standing on the other side of the door inches apart from him caused her heart to hurt. She didn't want to push Crane out, she just knew if she lost him she would go nuclear in the end all she was doing was trying to keep them both safe. He needed to know it wasn't his fault, it was her own issues deep down. She missed him far more than she would ever express, she has always been bad at expressing most of her emotions unless it was anger or sarcasm, ever since she darkened her own heart.
A downside to the matching amulets they wore was the connection was not fully one way and he could easily find her and sense her when she was close, if she hadn’t shield herself. Looking down to the ground letting out a faint sigh, talking right now was something she didn’t think she could do. She looked to the mess she made in her living room knowing that he was going to have questions. Hell that was clearly one of Malva spell books, the sooner she let him in the sooner he would be on his way after scolding her she was sure. So opening the door and keeping it in tact was the better option for her.
His stupid lopsided grin was rather effective at making a smile come to her lips. “I never said ADHD was your biggest issue, just that it seems to be clearly one of your issues.” she gave a roll of her eye back and sighed “Little Dhampir Skill sounds like one of your moves on your dates.” giving him a slight glare “We both know you would build me a new one before paying for one.” She smirked and gave him a chuckle “you seem to sometimes forget I am a little bit older then you Craner.” she moved from the doorway moving towards the kitchen grabbing two bottles of beer and moved towards him as the meet into the living room. “I know you exist, I feel you daily.” she mutter touching the amulet around his neck.
She then placed the beers in his hand turning her back to him, moving to pick up the coffee table she had flipped over and sat the candle back in the center before cleaning up the rest of the rest of it the best she could with him looking over her shoulder tossing the cloth over the spell book before standing up and taking one of the beers and settling down on the couch, crossing her likes as she then lets her gaze connect with his once again. “The last time we had a staring contest you gave me the shirt off your back so I would stop.” She pressed her thumb to the cap forcing it to pop up in the air before catching it in the air “besides I am not pushing everyone away, I have just been busy with the shop. The aspects haven’t called with a new mission for me in a while. I figured everything had been fine. Is there something I don’t know going on?” she asked tilting her head to the side letting her locks roll over her shoulder.
There were a lot of people Crane has easily forgotten or moved past in his life but Bex was not one of those people and never would be no matter how much she tried to push him away. They both knew they were more than a little fucked up even before the fall of Skye and that had only made things worse on both of them. Both had tried to help as many people as they could but in the end more had been lost than they had saved and to a point they had lost themselves as well. Crane had found himself again, mostly on his own but a few select others had helped as well. Unlike Bex he had an Aspect to focus on, one which should actually make it harder to hold onto the light within himself but it actually reminded him why he fought so hard. Not that he would ever admit it out loud but he did care about Cora and he took his position as her Guard very seriously even if he did often joke about it.
As she opened the door he felt like he could finally breathe seeing that she was physically okay, though physically was the least of his worries if he were being honest. Though the easy quip which came from her lips was a step in the right direction. “Well that’s just rude, not as rude or hurtful as Cora but just below that level.” He mused knowing she was right about that, it was an issue, not all of his issues, those could fill their own room in the mansion if he were being honest. “That is not my dating move, but I wouldn’t be a terrible one.” Not that he had any time to date anymore but he had been rather popular for a time. Granted his last relationship had been with a Celestial and well…every Ailward knew how that had turned out. “Well I do love to work with my hands and at least that way you would have a sturdy and one of a kind door.”
Rolling his eyes at her old comment he knew there wasn’t that much of an age gap…was there? Sometimes it was hard to keep all the Guards and their ages straight but he was relatively certain she wasn’t even half a century older than him. “Very little age gap there, besides, we both have very long life spans and we’re both questionable at best with modern slang.” Not that either really tried that hard since they had other things to focus on. Looking around the living room it was an obvious mess and he was sure that was why Bex didn’t want to let him in and a familiar book of Malva’s caught his eye, “Knowing I exist and seeming to care are two different things and I thought we were better friends than that.”
Taking the beer he brought the chilled longneck bottle to his lips and took a deep swallow. Without saying anything he began to help her right the living room since he was sure that she could feel the things left unsaid hanging between them. For the moment he would keep his mouth shut but that wouldn’t last long so she should enjoy the silence while she had it. Though she sat down, he had no and remained standing, staring her down as seemed to be their custom. “Well last time I didn’t have as much to lose or as big of a stake in our contest, this time I do.” He took another drink without blinking just staring directly at her. “I’m the last person you can lie to Bex, I know they have called and I know you haven’t answered. Just like I know I’ve called and you haven’t been answering but now I’m understanding why.” He said motioning to the now hidden book. “We’re all going through things Bex but you separating yourself from the rest of us just give me another thing to worry about and with Cora, I already have my hands full. So instead of bullshitting me, how about you just tell me what’s going on with you instead of changing the subject?”
Bexley knew there was a reason they were drawn to each other. They both were fucked up in their own ways. That is why they made such great friends, they didn’t judge one another well most of the time they didn’t. Bexley would have died with the rest of the guards if she he didn’t pull her out of the chaos, and she knew he did because maybe they both knew they couldn't lose the other. Bexley held an admiration for those who found themselves after so much lost. She couldn’t something in the cosmos felt off and she couldn’t figure out what. Or maybe she was just wrong. Bexley was one of the few guards who wasn’t assigned to protecting a certain aspect in these times, thought that came with the fact that she was the guards Linguist. So she would go where she was needed. Though with the guard group becoming even more diverse she was sure there would be no true need for her as the only Linguist.
Bexley chocolate eyes gave a roll as he spoke of her quips as rude, her lips twitching into a smirk, “Cora isn’t that bad.” She gave a shake of her head, while Cora was the aspect of darkness Bex always considered herself darker than Cora. After all she held two men hostage and tortured them darkening her own heart. “Do you even date? I can’t recall the last time you had a date.” she tried to remember but there was no point, they both never seem to have much of a love life. Though she just assumed she was a true lost cause, she wasn’t sure anyone could even touch her without her wanting to hex them. Bexley snorted out as he spoke “Oh you love to work with your hands I am sure.” she shook her head and looked to her door “Are you saying my door is not sturdy enough? Door shaming me now.”
There may have been a thirty year age difference before them but it was enough for her to hold it over his head and give her a large grin holding it over his head. “We both have immortal life spans thanks to Deus little gift” she said touching the ring that graced her left pointer finger. “Are you saying I am not down with the kids?” she chuckled out softly at the thought of the language barriers though she could always play off like she was not from here. What he said next hit her like a tire was thrown at her head, causing her to avoid his eye contact. She let out the softest of breaths. “I care…” it was true she did, She went out of her way to do things that went unnoticed to him, such as sneaking stones in his room for extra protection. “I care.” she repeated feeling the lump forming in her throat which caused her to clear her throat roughly.
She was thankful for the bottle in her hands as she raised it to her lips taking a long sip from it to force the lump away. As they picked up the mess she gave a small “Thank you.” almost as soft as the air that filled the room. Her gaze held his as he tried to stare her down, she knew it was his tactic when it came to her. Most of the time she would break after all the longer he stared the more he began to look crazy. She wasn’t use to having someone worry about losing her, it made her feel strange inside. Giving a shake of her head towards him “They called explain the mission and I would suggest who to take, there is a difference. Only phone call I have been avoiding is from the guards… and you.” she cleared her throat realizing how much of an ass it made her sounds “I just couldn’t face things, so many of the guard lost friends and family and I blame myself.”
She looked away from his gaze then, to the hidden book that she didn’t want him to see. “You shouldn’t worry about me.” She was on her feet again and in front of him, her finger nail on her chest “Do you know how infuriating you are Crane? This need to protect me needs to die because you can’t not with what I plan on doing.” she realized she had already said to much. If you must know.” She gave a heavy sigh as she pulled the hidden book out and opened to a time bending spell. “I am going back to stop the fall.” She said as she dropped the book onto the table “If I could get the damn spell to work anyways.” Her gaze focused on the book for a moment “Thought it would be easy since I knew the aspect of magic, has presented to be more of a challenge then I thought.” her head rocked slightly forward. “So like I said, don’t worry about me, if I do this right then we won’t have to be in mourning anymore.”
Crane and Bex tended to have the innate ability to get on one another’s nerves like no one else could, however they would both move heaven and hell for the other and no one else better harass the other in such a way. It was just the sort of friendship they had and most didn’t understand it but they didn’t have to because he and Bex understood it and that was what mattered. There weren’t a large number of people that either really got along with, in truth, Crane could count the people he liked on one hand but he would also willing live or die for those handful of people. Things were clearly different between them now and that was what he was having an issue with, it wasn’t like they had been in some great amazing and committed relationship, but she had been and still was his best friend, no matter what.
“You still scare me more than Cora does most days, but that might just be because I’ve actually seen your bad side, she just threats me with hers.” He mused well aware that both he and Bex had more darkness than most realized running through them. Of course Crane was pretty sure that he did a better joke at hiding it than Bex did but she didn’t really try to do so most days. “I date…fine I have dated,” He said as he ran a hand through his hair, “It’s just been about a hundred years.” Had it really been that long? It had been before the Celestials were locked away so yeah it had been that long. He’s closed himself off for a hundred years because of what they had be told needed to be done and because it had been his duty, he had followed orders. “You can’t say it hasn’t been as long if not longer since you’ve actually dated someone either.” Taking Sapphire for ice cream was probably the closest thing to a date he had been on in one hundred years. Truly both he and Bex had some issues they needed to work on before inviting someone else into their lives. “I’m only door shaming you because it’s a flimsy door. Shame,” He raised and lowed his hand like he was ringing an invisible bell, “Shame,” He said repeating the motion, “Shame.” He concluded with a smirk since even if someone got passed the door, what was waiting inside was what would truly give them pause.
A chuckle left him at Bex’s words since she was right, unless they decided to leave the Guard and then those gifts would be taken back. Though he couldn’t imagine looking for a way out, if he had wanted one he would have left when the Celestials were captured since that was the event which had pushed him to his limits. “Just rub it in why don’t you old lady?” Of course when she asked her question of being ‘down with the kids’ he started laughing so hard that his side began to hurt. “No, not at all if that’s what you think the “kids” are saying these days.” As always the conversation took a serious turn once more, “I know you care Bex, deep down I know that and I feel it but sometimes it’s nice to hear you say it too.” Bex had never been the sort to just come out and say her emotions so he had clearly pushed some sort of button to get such an answer. “For helping you clean up, for forcing you to open the door or just being here? Because regardless you’re welcome.” She was his friend and he would always be here for here in the small ways and the big ones as well. The two entered into an intense stare down which was normal when they were trying to see who would break first and he was hoping that it would be her because he wanted the truth. So she would do the bare minimum and only answer the calls which were necessary which shouldn’t have been much of a surprise. “Bex we all lose, we all did and the only thing that’s kept me sane is the fact that we didn’t lose everyone and everything!” He slammed the bottle down harder than he meant to, “You couldn’t have done anything Bex, neither could I but we didn’t cause it and we aren’t a fault. We saved who we could and we remember those we’ve lost.” He said trying to make her see sense feeling his own throat tightening.
As Bex stood Crane did the same moving to place his hand on her shoulder, “Broken people have to stick together Bex and as your friend, your best damn friend, I’m always going to worry about you no matter how infuriating it might be. You signed up for that when we were both still younger beings.” Though as the last words seemed to reach his ears his brow furrowed. “What do you mean what you plan on doing?” His concern growing since he knew that Bex could be reckless at times and given how closed off she had been recently he wasn’t sure what was on her mind. “Bex…you can’t do that. Messing with time….I’m not sure what level is after dangerous but you’re heading into the danger zone for sure.” The one thing Crane has learned a long time ago was all magic came with a price and no matter what you wanted to stop, there was always consequences and for stopping something of the magnitude of what had occurred on Skye, it would cost more than a single person could pay. “It you do this right we’re still going to lose something, someone Bex. There are consequences for everyone and the fall out of Skye was terrible but if you use magic in such a way the outcome could be ten times worse. You know this.” He said in a matter of fact tone because she wasn’t stupid, she was a Diviner and knew how magic worked, hell she knew Malva and he knew in this case the Aspect of Magic would agree with him.
There was a reason Bexley and Crane couldn’t quiet one another. They had their share of lonely nights after they had thought they were going to die on a mission. That was the night that Bexley confided in him her past and how she had never taken a lover even though she owned a brothel. Her first experience was the worst and last sexual experience she had had. Of course Crane replied even on the brink of death ‘no wonder you are such a tight ass.’ it was in that moment their bond grew, until the fall. Bexley believed he let his emotions cloud his duty and blamed herself for the amount of people that were lost that date. It was why she had been stealing Mal books in secret and avoiding everyone. She was trying to figure out how to go back. Still he was the only person she wanted to be close too but refused to allow herself to feel that way. That was why she gave him the amulet she wasn’t sure she could live in a world he wasn’t apart of.
Bexley could only bring herself to give a half chuckle at the joke with a roll of her eyes. “Or maybe because your emotions are not placed in Cora like they are with me.” She cleared her throat as she shifted slightly and gave a gentle nod. “Good you should be going out, you deserve to be happy.” she said as she raised the beer to her lips swallowing the bitter brew. “Dating isn’t really on my mind right now.” or ever. She finished the last part in her head. It was pointless to want something that was just going to do more harm than good. She wasn’t good for anyone, she had come to accept that recently. “My door is not flimsy!” Bexley bit back slapping at his hand as he rang the fake shame bell. “Don’t make me take a chunk out of you.” She hissed the all too well threat.
Bexley couldn’t help the smile that came to her lips as he laughed hard at her acting old when she actually could keep up with those in the streets better than some of the older members of the guard. It had been a long time since she had heard him laugh because of one of her bad jokes. He was about the only person she let herself joke with. She nodded softly as he said she knew he care. “Just thank you.” was all she returned before the stare down. Bexley raised her brow at his outburst looking to his beer as it over flowed before she snapped back raising her voice. “You don’t know that! I am not a weak diviner I trained under the aspect of magic for god sakes! I could have saved them! I could have!” tears started to well in her eyes as she took hold of his side wishing she had the strength to push him away but she didn’t.
Bexley looked at him with a heavy gaze before looking back to the spellbook and she closed her eyes tightly letting out a big sigh. “You are right Crane you would still lose someone, but gain so many more back in their place. Isn’t that better, give one's life for the many?” She said out loud as she took hold of his hands removing them from her shoulders and held them tightly. “If I did the spell perfectly everyone we lost will come back but I would have to give myself in place, the ultimate sacrifice. No redos.” She raised his hands to cup her face. “Isn’t that what any of use would do? Give ourselves in place for all those that have been lost? Please tell me you understand.” It was the real reason she was cutting herself off, to make it easier on everyone her death. She knew most would be sad but very few would mourn her like they do others.
The Guard had been Crane’s family for as long as he could remember, he had spent more time in the Guard that with his own family. Which meant it was easy to get close to those he was around often, such as Bexley. The two had only been friends for the longest of times and then things had escalated rather suddenly. Not that either could be faulted since near death will do that to you but he did care about Bex. Granted she didn’t seem to hold the same feelings for him anymore but that didn’t change the past or his own feelings. If they Isle hadn’t fallen they likely wouldn’t be in the position they were now but he felt like she blamed them both for the people they couldn’t save. He had seen the destruction and carnage and knew that she was the only person left he could save and he did, even if she faulted him for it.
At the words that left the Diviner’s lip, Crane rolled his, “Well I would hope that I don’t feel the same about you and Cora since that would just be weird. I don’t think I’m her type.” He joked before looking at the floor as she spoke once more, “Going out and being happy aren’t the same thing and they don’t always have anything to do with each other.” Besides those he had been out with where the person he wanted to be out with which was why it hurt so damn much that Bex shut him out. “Maybe dating should be on your mind, it wouldn’t kill you to get out of your apartment.” He said even though he would just be incredibly jealous if she did actually follow his advice. “You act like that threat should scare me.” He mused before wiggling his eyebrows at her a chuckle leaving his lips.
The generalized ‘thank you’ was more than enough for Crane since somethings between them didn’t necessary have to be vocalized but it was nice to know what was going on in her head on occasion. “No matter how much you push me away, I’m still going to be here for you.” Even if she didn’t want to let him in or see him because she did in a way need him. As she snapped back at him he took a step towards her feeling his own temper fighting with his need to sooth her. “We lost some of the best Guards including Lailah and many others. They were all well trained and none of them were weak. Being unable to save everyone doesn’t make you weak, it makes you a realist. Even the Aspects can’t bring people back.” What she was talking about was incredibly dangerous and given the cost it took for someone to use Celestial energy to travel through time, he knew it wasn’t so simple.
“You don’t know if it’ll work, you could end up killing yourself and it not even work. I’m not willing to risk a life that someone is currently living for those who have passed on. It wasn’t raised to see death as the end.” Death was something to be respected, the spirits being free of their physical body. “I don’t understand. You’re asking me to believe in something that’s not me. The sad truth is that they’re gone Bex, they’re gone and we’re left to continue on. We can’t keep living in the past when there are so many things that need our attention now. Regardless to the Isle falling we’re still losing people. You can’t change the grand design of life, one small changed creates a ripple, what you’re suggesting is something so extreme that the consequences could be far more than your life.” As she asked isn’t that what anyone would do he shook his head no, “I would willingly placed myself in harms way and put my life on the line for someone who’s alive but the dead should be allowed to rest.”
Bexley did blame them, but mostly herself in the end for everything that happened in the Fall. She was trying to let go of the blame because she knew what she had to do in order to fix everything. The bitter part was she would be leaving him, the one person she cared about more than she would ever admit out loud or to herself. She chuckled and sighed “Well you clearly have a think for darkness how do you know you aren’t Cora type as well. I mean look at you…” The diviners eyes trailed along him slowly before she pulled her gaze back up to look at him but didn’t finish the statement as she moved around the room slightly.
It was best not to look at him directly when she did, she could feel herself slipping from her mission. “I’m not saying they are the same thing Crane not at first but I am sure you could find someone who makes you happy if you went on dates.” The ache in her chest burned as the words left her lips. She couldn’t stand the thought of him with someone else but she also knew she didn’t have much time. “I leave my home all the time.” She glared at him, “How else would anything get done at my shop, while actively trying to take down a pest.” She gave a slight growl thinking of Abe. As he wiggled his eyebrows at her she felt a smirk playing on her lips. “My threats should scare you deeply Dhampy.”
She would be lying if she told him, that she didn’t like him around. She was one of her truest selves around him. She missed being around him, but this only showed her why she had been so hellbent on pushing him away over the last three years. “You have been busy with missions and keeping the Ailwards safe, I shouldn’t be your focus.” Tensions were building though, with the space and time that had passed it gave way to anger and confusion between the pair. Both knew there was something they were not talking about or address, yelling and angry outburst made it easier to overlook. “Yeah I was never one for realism anyways, Real life is a bitter pill you swallow over and over again till it chokes you and you can’t breath.” The dark diviner muttered out trying to control her angry flare. “I refuse to believe the aspects can’t bring people back, I just don’t think they know how without balance.” She said softer as she closed her eyes, taking a deep breath.
It would be so simple just to make him hate her and storm out but she didn’t want their last moments to be like that. She wanted him to still hold a fondness towards her. She knew that what she was saying to him went against everything he believed in, yet she didn’t expect him to accept it either. “We lost so many good people Crane, and I lived? It makes no sense, I am the Darkest guard the one who shouldn’t have made it through the barrier.” She swallowed hard. “I don’t expect you to accept what I am going to do Craner, I just expect you to not get in my way as I do it.” She let her eyes fall back to Malva spell book and placed it on the coffee table. She was quiet for a long moment before pulling her gaze back up to his. “I just hope if it works, you won’t hate me.” She felt the urge to remove his memories, put a block up so he would forget showing up there and her plan and yet the longer she stared at him, the more she studied him, trying to remember every inch of his face.
Bex knew him better than just about anyone else, that was what tended to happen when you spent a great deal of time together on mission, training and a few other occurrences that neither really addressed or spoke of anymore. Moments between just the two of them which meant more to him than she realized and she wanted him to just give that up, to give her up and allow her to follow a path of pure insanity and it wasn’t something he could allow. “Yeah well being attracted to darkness and giving into are two very different things. We’ve both seen the worst in people Bex but I still want to believe in the best.” And he truly did no matter how hard of a concept that did happen to be.
A low growl of annoyance left him as she spoke the very words that he wished she wouldn’t. “I don’t need your permission or advice in that subject Bex. I found someone who made me happy, someone who I thought made me a better man, a better guard and I lost her to herself.” The pain in his features was evident and something he could never hide from her, nor could he stop the slight tremble to his voice. Dark eyes rolled at her comment since he was well aware of her little rivalry with Abraham since it was far from subtle on both ends of it. “Maybe your threats would scare me more I didn’t actually know the real you Bex or the fact that no matter how pissed we might be with one another we can’t hurt each other like that, we might fight you know how that’s always ended.” And it wasn’t in blood or hate.
Why did she have to be like this? It wasn’t always the case which was what frustrated him and angered him all the more even though he was usually pretty level-headed. Ever since he had saved her from the fall of the Isle it was like he was looking at someone else every time his eyes landed on her because she wasn’t the same woman and if she was, then it was buried deep inside. “I’m sorry that it seemed to be an issue that I focus and worry on those I care about but I’m not going to stop so just accept it and try to show me just a glimpse of the woman I lo…” He shook his head not even finishing his sentence, what did it matter to her now anyway? That thought alone lacerating his heart in a way he hadn’t anticipated and for just a brief second it was hard to breathe. “Because bringing people back breaks the balance Bex, especially on that scale, do you really think one life can appease the gods for returning so many? You have to see this is crazy.” He knew it was the wrong wording to use with her but he didn’t care because he needed her to see some semblance of sense in this matter.
Crane wanted to hold onto the anger he was feeling but it just wasn’t who he was as a person and it rapidly began to morph into sadness which he knew she would take for pity though they were far from the same thing. “The life of one guard is never weighed higher than another Bexley, every life is equal, we all passed through the barrier, we all took an oath and we all uphold it. There has to be darkness for light and light for darkness you aren’t worth less than anyone else because of what your life has turned you into. The fact that your even considering such a sacrifice means you aren’t as dark as you think you are Bex, those who live in the dark care nothing for those who dwell in the light.” Though as she said she expected him not to get in the way a snort left his lips as he shook his head. “I can’t let you do this Bex, you should better than I can’t and not just because I can’t stand the thought of losing you. So either give me a blood oath that you will not continue on this path or I will have to tell the council.” And the thought of that alone made his blood run cold.
Emotions, her emotions complicated things that needed to be done. It was the biggest reason she had cut herself off from the Ailward manor and from him. He was her weakness, the thing that would make her second guess her actions. “If I recall you were attracted to my darkness at one point. If I remember correctly ‘You are so moody and need to be put in your place.’ she thought back to one of their fights when they had been around each other. “Darkness isn’t all bad there. There is a beauty in it. Without it, we wouldn’t see the stars.” her eyes lingered to the window for a moment. “Sometimes giving into darkness can be fun.” she said as she looked back to him. “If done right.”
Bexley brow shot up the moment the low growl left his throat and he seemed annoyed with her words. Not that it was the first time she annoyed him with her words. But as he ended the statement and the pain crossed his face she felt her chest ache looking into his dark eyes for a long moment. Every fiber of her being wanted to reach out and soothe his fears yet she stood there frozen. “You are right when it comes to you I was never very good at treating. Even if I wanted them to be, things went well.” her gaze drifted towards her bedroom door for a moment. “The only person to ever have that effect over me has been you.” she said softly, with a gentle gaze as her mind went to remembering their nights and times together it had been so long now.
She listened to him as he asked her to show him a glimpse of the woman he once… loved? Did he love her? The pair had never said it openly. Bexley had never said it but she knew she felt it because she knew if she had lost him in the fall she wouldn’t be standing where she was right now. Her dark gaze returned resting on him again. “I know it sounds crazy. But it hurts so much not to try anything. We all just moved on! We just accepted this grand scale lost! It feels like they are forgotten!” she started raising her voice. “I feel like I am going mad? That I am the only one still mourning their loss. I can’t get their faces out of my brain!” Her eyes slowly turning green as she started to get angrier. “They are burned there screaming for me to help and I’m trying!”
Bexley felt her head fall as she felt a surge of magic shooting off and breaking some of the glass candle holders there before she looked back up to as the few tears the manage to break free and roll down her face slowly. “I just want to help them Craner.” she said as she took a step closer and her hand raised up to rest upon his face gently. Though as he asked her to give him a blood oath she couldn’t. It was the one thing she wouldn’t break and she couldn’t promise it. “I will stop, you have my word.” she had hoped it would be enough at least to stop him for the night. If it wasn’t she hoped the next bit would be. She kept her eyes locked with his slowly leaned up and pressed her lips to his gently, the moment their lips touched she let her eyes drift close. She had forgotten out good it felt to feel his lips against her. Her hand moved from his cheek and down his chest slowly wondering if he would give into the intimate moment with her after all this time.