To The Moon and Back (Open to Jaesung, Sangeun and Hanseol) COMPLETED

The topic of his family and when he was going to tell them the truth about the life he now lived in Evermore had been on the forefront of Jae’s mind for a long while now, he didn’t know how you just came out and told the people who mattered to you so much that you aren’t what they wanted you to be. Jae had been putting it off for months, it was never the right time he would tell himself, he would go onto a video call with his parents and think he had worked up the courage to tell them what was on his mind and then he would have the usual discussion about what he achieved and how they couldn’t wait for him to come home to Korea and bring pride to his family. He knew they were waiting for him to fold, biding their time while they let him live his dream knowing he’d come running back them. Except he didn’t want to go running back, far from it.

There was only one person from his past that knew about the life he led now and the only reason he had been forced into telling them was because they came to visit in Evermore and saw him and Hanseol together. While they hadn’t seen any of their more intimate gestures, Jae had decided to share the truth with them because he needed to ask them to keep their mouths shut about what they saw. And as told by the lack of mentioning in on calls and messages, they had been true to their word and not told his parents about what they saw. Still Jae felt like he was living a lie, one he didn’t want to live now that he was sure that the future he wanted to have was here in Evermore, not just because his boyfriend was here but because he really enjoyed the way of life here and he found himself getting more and more attached to it with each day that passed.

He’d been putting a lot of thought into it, so much so that it was keeping him up at night lately, he was trying to figure out what to do or how he broke it to his family without completely losing them but every way that he saw it playing out ended badly. Jae didn’t know how to get past it, he couldn’t ask Han for advice because he really had no idea about the sort of community Jae was raised and Daehyun wasn’t any use either considering how unorthodox his life had been. Honestly, Jae had been wanting to call Sangeun and talk to him about things for a long time but he knew how busy his brother was with big clients lately and the last thing Jae wanted to do was add to Eun’s already full plate with problems he didn’t need.

The dhampir was lost in thought as his head was rested against Hanseol’s shoulder, they had some movie about people who got drunk and did stupid things playing on the TV but he hadn’t really been paying much attention to it, just enjoying having some peace and quiet in the dorm apartment and getting to spend time with his favorite person. Still, he wished he could pay attention to the movie because the whirring going on in his mind was starting to make him restless, still, he did his best not to move too much as he kept his eyes on the screen and got lost in his mind again. It was one of those rare afternoons they spent at Jae’s dorm because it was nearer to the grocery store which they would go to in the evening one most people had finished and gone home for the day, it made the shopping process easier for both of them, Jae’s roommates were also always out for this little period every week so it worked out well.

Jae almost jumped out of his skin when heard a knocking at the door and he turned to Han with a curious expression on his face, well he wasn’t expecting any guests so he figured it was just someone coming to check in on the apartment or something “Back in a moment” he stated and pressed a soft kiss to the star’s cheek before he headed into the hallway and up to the front door. He didn’t even bother to look through the eyeglass, just reached for the handle and pulled the door open. The moment that the door was fully open Jae gasped in shock before he completely threw his entire body at the figure standing in the doorway capturing him in a hug that was so forceful that it would have tackled them both to the ground if it wasn’t for the fact his brother was pretty strong.

“What the hell is this?” Jae murmured into Eun’s shoulder as he held him tightly completely in disbelief that he was actually here, Jae forced himself to pull back to look his brother over completely shocked to see him “Why didn’t you call?” he asked with widened eyes “Not that I’m complaining, I just…” he pressed his lips together “만나보게 돼서 기뻐 (I’m glad to see you)” Jae spoke before he realized he’d been quite loud with his excitement.

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Eun almost cursed out loud when he realized he had let it slipped on that the one that bothered to remind him wasn’t just Ahri, their sister, but rather his fiancee, Ahreum, who just so happened to memorize every date possible on their family. Jae wasn’t supposed to hear that, well eventually and perhaps, before the day ends or before he even leaves the apartment, his baby brother would come to know of the redhead female who’s busy in their home country now, catering to every demand and working in her well-established career just as well, while also planning their wedding that’s also due in 8 more months, just in time before he finishes his usual cases.

He wasn’t sure how to break it down to Jae, seeing as he’s missed quite a lot since leaving Korea to further his tertiary education here in Evermore, and the last thing Eun wishes to do is to give him anything to worry his head on. Though he knew Jae already found out regarding their mother’s sickness, who is becoming a lot frailer as the day passes by, but could still show her excitement over having her eldest son marrying in eight months time. That’s precisely the reason why he couldn’t even attempt to hold this off until he can rethink it, for the sake of his mother’s happiness and their family, he had to make one more sacrifice and while it may take half of what he’s planned ahead of his life, it would be worth it, in the end, right? Anything for the family. That’s always the way it has been with Sangeun.

Sending a rather judgmental look his way, Eun shook his head and scoffed. “A freak accident, sure. Let’s try and wrap you around bubble wraps, the next time, okay? I actually want to have an intact handsome brother to visit the next time. Might not be equally as good looking as me, but you’re still carrying the family’s good looking gene so… no brother of mine would suffer a burn.” He even pats Jae’s cheeks playfully, with a smile aligned with his cheerful look. The air grew more awkward and Eun was starting to get very uncomfortable until Jae spilled it. He wasn’t disappointed over the fact that his brother is gay and is actually dating a guy who looked like a live version of a bunny, but it’s more to the one where Jae decided it was fine keeping it from him.

An equally offended look masked his face when he heard the date where they first established things. That long? “Since February?! And you didn’t think to tell me… I’m hurt, Jae” he grumbled and placed one hand over his chest and let out a dramatic sigh. “What did I do to deserve this kind of brother…I have no idea. Can’t believe I’ve been treated so cruel like this.” Of course, he was happy that his brother found happiness, with everything that has happened with the younger dhampir, Jae deserved every single one of them. Now he’s just afraid to break down the news that he’s getting married because he didn’t want to ruin this happy mood. “Cliche move though, tripping...really?” It seems like his boyfriend is also very happy to hear the revelation. “You must’ve held it in for long...you know I’m not gonna judge, all that matters to me is that you’re happy” he assured.

However, he couldn’t hold in his laughter when the other male tripped by the couch. “So you scored not only an attractive guy but also a goofy one that could rival you? I don’t believe in perfect matches, but damn you found a perfect match, little brother.” Was he jealous? Just a tiny bit. Okay, fine, a lot.

Jae could see a conflicted look on his brother’s face for a few moments that he barely recognized, his brother was always so calm and collected, always together that to see him panic even for a second was unfamiliar to him. The younger male knew his brother wasn’t Superman but sometimes it was hard to see him any other way, he was the guy Jae had always looked up to, the one his parents always told him that he should be more like and that definitely affected him more than he wanted his brother to know. But that brief flash of concern in his eyes made Jae wonder if there was something he wasn’t telling him, the younger dhampir had been pretty disconnected from his family lately, that wasn’t exactly a secret.

Jae laughed leaning into the playful touch his brother gave him and smiled brightly like a dork “You know you’re not the first person to suggest bubble wrap” he commented with a gentle chuckle, he’d probably still find a way to make that dangerous for himself, to be honest. He pulled a face when Eun called him handsome but himself more handsome and shook his head a little “Such a modest guy you are hyung” he teased too and chuckled before he glanced over to Han with a smile. He was really happy they got to meet in a setting like this, one that felt lighthearted and easy. Though he could understand why his boyfriend might feel a little like a third wheel, Jae hadn’t got to properly catch up with Eun in a long time.

“Of course I thought to tell you” he defended immediately “You’re the first person I wanted to tell” he admitted with a chuckle “But I wanted to make sure” he shrugged a little blushing as he met Han’s eyes “I wanted to make sure things were real first” his brother was funny with his reaction though, setting him at ease and making them all laugh. “Well tripping sounds more like me than anything else” Jae admitted with a shrug, he was convinced there were invisible wires set in place around the world just to knock him on his ass sometimes. He did soften his gaze as his brother said he wanted to him be happy though “I am very happy” Jae admitted with a soft nod of his head.

When Han started to excuse himself Jae pulled himself up from the couch only to watch the celestial giddily trip over himself in his excitement which made him laugh, especially when his brother commented on it “I have very high standards hyung, I think you two will get along well” he believed that they were both really good, really funny people. “I’ll walk you to the door” he spoke softly to Hanseol before he headed through the hallway with him. He looked up at his boyfriend with an apologetic smile “There’s still time to run before you commit to my crazy family” he teased softly “I’ll make it up to you okay” he spoke softly as he leaned in to kiss him softly pressing his hands against Hanseol’s cheeks as he did so and then pulled back to open the front door for him “Don’t forget to give Yeontan a hug from me” he prompted with a gentle laugh, man he loved that dog so much and he couldn’t wait to be living in the same place and being able to care for him.

Once Hanseol had left, Jae took a long breath just to take in his own disbelief for a moment before he headed back towards the sitting area and returned to take a seat across from his brother. He ran his tongue over his bottom lip feeling the pressure return a little as he tried to phrase what he wanted to say next “How’s mom?” he asked shakily, he feared the reason his brother might be here was to drag him home if he was honest. Jae didn’t want to go home, he loved his life here and the people he’d met here, he felt like he belonged here.

Seeing the interaction between the two Moon siblings made Hanseol’s heart swell in happiness, even more so after Jae revealed the big secret to his eldest brother, who then also accepted it with an open mind and heart, which elicited a squeal from the celestial who is just happy with the current ordeal. There were a few reasons why the fallen star is elated, at the moment. First, Jae is reunited with his brother, whom he’s told Han plenty of times, that he respected and loved. What kind of boyfriend is he if he doesn’t follow in the same happiness to see the pure love displayed between the two brothers?

Two, Jae finally spilled the beans to another person he’s afraid to tell despite all the description saying Eun is one of the best people to tell regarding the matter. One more problem solved for the couple, at least they won’t have to act like they’re not a couple in front of Eun since it seems like the elder dhampir is residing in Evermore for a while. Three, he had the chance to meet the infamous Sangeun Moon. According to the stories Jae had told the celestial, he’s a good guy who deserves all the respect given and seeing the bond between the two tells him he wasn’t wrong.

For the first time, Hanseol didn’t mind being the third wheel, but things would get awkward with him the room any longer, so he decided to take his leave and allow his boyfriend to catch up with his brother. The look on Jae’s face, how could he ever let that look go unnoticed, it made the dhampir look more beautiful in his eyes, the way his eyes lit up in delight and that boxy smile that the celestial just loves so much. When Jae offered to walk him to the door, he just smiled in response and soon, they were by the entrance, with both of them staring at each other lovingly. “Please, compare your crazy family to my years of craziness, I’m down for this ride, Jaesung Moon, you’re mine and I’m not letting you go. Admittedly since I’m a kind guy, I’ll let you catch up with your brother because I’m considerate like that,” he winked playfully, bringing one hand up to ruffle the other male’s hair.

He only smiled happily into the kiss, the corner of his lips turning into a lopsided grin as he bowed dramatically and brought one hand up to kiss as any proper gentleman would do. “I shall look forward to that time then, sir.” What kind of person is not weak when their partner cares so much for their pets, it’s making him melt from inside. “I’m starting to get jealous of Yeontan constantly stealing your attention, be careful, Mr. Moon. I might get possessive.” A stupid grin was spread across his face when the door was closed, as the celestial rubbed one hand over his chest to calm his excited breathing and ended up slumping down to the door against the door, with a huge grin plastered on his lips. “Oh Jae…” he mumbled giddily before resuming his steps down the stairs, almost tripping because he was really jumping around. Unfortunately, the poor star did trip on his last step but caught his balance just in time. Doesn’t stop him from having the same grin.

It was probably stupid of him to even think about the best possibilities that would flow smoothly the moment he opened his mouth to tell his baby brother about the upcoming ‘latest’ addition to their already handful family. But Eun was torn on what to think, at the moment. It’s a never-ending dilemma for the elder dhampir, who kept his eyes fixated on the couple before him. His brother had found his own happiness and Eun couldn’t find a flaw in it, thankfully, and now he’s questioning his own self, was he that heartless to break this heartfelt and giddy revelation that had obviously made Hanseol a happy man today, for the sake of him being truthful to Jae? Is it really worth ruining this happy moment?

But if he didn’t tell Jae, when he clearly placed the invitation card in that same paper bag where he had put his birthday gifts in, it’s bound to be very chaotic if he doesn’t spill as soon as possible. Eun knew better than to keep secrets from his youngest brother, somehow Jae always knew there was something that was bothering him and would often prod it out of him, which mostly ended up well since the elder dhampir couldn’t lie to his brother. Maybe to others, he’s a bit of a silver tongue, but to Jae? Never. His brother is the only person he can never lie to, and while he respected and loves his parents, they can be quite wholesome and the kind of people he didn’t want to be handling 24/7, so there has been plenty of white lies in his portion.

“I’m always modest, it’s in my perfect existence to have that in my gene, come on Jae, you know that as well as others did” he winked playfully, in attempts to diffuse the stress that’s slowly piling in his head, at the moment. Gosh, keeping this from his brother is harder than he thought. But he really didn’t wish to ruin the moment his brother is having with his boyfriend when was the last time he’s witnessed this happy exchange in Jae? “Well, I’m glad you told me. I’m happy for you, truly. It’s been a while since I’ve seen you all giddy and excited, little brother” he beamed, as his gaze went back and forth from Jae to Han, with a grin that seemed contagious enough to infect others. They look so good together, he wondered how it’s been for them, but from the look of things, they’re at a good place and he hoped they’ll remain there for a long time.

His eyes lingered at the spot where the two of them were sitting at previously when Jae insisted on escorting his boyfriend out until it went over to the paper bag that sits neatly on the table. How is he going to break this down again? He waited until Jae returns and offered him a smile. Of course, Jae would worry about their mother, she hasn’t been exactly healthy as of late. “She’s fine, she’s… mom. You know how she is. She won’t stay in bed more than a few hours even if it would kill her” he chuckled dryly, truly their mother is quite stubborn, and it might’ve traveled in the genes too, seeing as all of the Moon siblings had their own fair share in being stubborn in their own rights. “But after our beloved brother, Hyunsik, prescribed her with a few medicines, she’s gotten slightly better, but apparently it didn’t stop her from being a control freak, either”

Don’t get him wrong, Eun loves his parents equally, though maybe he did have a small portion of him that favors his mother more due to the care she showed him in the early years. “Hyunsik and Ahri remain the same, though I’m pretty sure our sister is seeing someone, she’s a bad liar, so… it’s not hard to detect her sneaking out without resolve” It’s clear that he was avoiding the topic of himself, just focusing on the others of their family. Because if they’re gonna talk about him, it means he’ll have to talk about Ahreum a lot sooner.

Jae had looked between Han and Eun with a bright smile on his face, this was all he wanted, for his boyfriend and brother to get along and while Han was making quite a hasty exit so the brothers could catch up, he felt a huge sense of relief from seeing the two of them meet and having his brother accept the news he had told him better than Jae could ever really ask for. “Well then you weren’t paying attention back there at the airport because I was starting my new life” Jae nodded a little, he was glad he left, though he did miss Eun a lot. With that, he led the celestial to the door and saw him off. He could see the happiness in Han’s eyes which was reflected in his own, he was proud of this relationship, in what they had built in the months they had been together, it filled him with a fulfillment he didn’t know he needed.

Jae took a long breath the moment that he closed the door, he hadn’t been prepared for this at all and it kind of didn’t feel real because of that, but he remembered the look on Hanseol’s face in the moments before he left, the way he looked completely lit up and elated by the fact that he hadn’t hidden behind the roommate or friend story. And he had been tempted to because this whole time Jae had been worried about losing people, worried what his family was going to think of the life he was now building for himself. That didn’t mean it was going to stop him from doing what he wanted to though, it just meant he was living a little bit of a double life in the eyes of his parents right now.

He wondered what spurred his brother’s sudden surprise visit, it wasn’t really like Eun to travel often, or at least the younger dhampir had never seen his brother travel anywhere but other cities in Korea. Jae supposed it was probably work related through because his brother would quite likely do anything for his job, that, or his parents had sent him to visit because they wanted to convince Jae to come home. He pulled a face at the thought of that, they had always tried to hold control over the young male’s life, always told him what he should and shouldn’t want for his future and for the longest time he had just done as they asked every time they asked. Until he realized he wasn’t the perfect son they wanted to be and probably wouldn’t ever be, especially not now that he’d met Hanseol who had quite literally changed his whole perspective on his own life.

Jae finally returned to the spot on the couch opposite Eun and crossed one leg over the other as he looked back at him, Jae’s eyes fell on the paper bag from earlier now curious to look inside and reached out to grab it, holding it to his chest and smelling the scent of the candles inside, it was a really thoughtful gift. When Sangeun talked about their mother not wanting to stay in bed Jae’s expression faltered a little with worry for her “I felt really bad for not being able to make it back after everything” Jae admitted as he pulled one of the candles out and held it up to his nose, taking in the scent before setting it down on the table and doing the same with each one he took out “Glad to hear she’s on medicine that seems to be helping though, I feel a little blind from here” he looked down at the table feeling guilt for not being there.

“I’m pretty sure Ahri has been on and off seeing someone for the most part of the last 5 years or so” Jae commented on their sister’s behavior with a shrug of his shoulders “How dad has never noticed is beside me” he commented with a thoughtful look, she wasn’t exactly subtle after all. Jae pulled out one of the notebooks and was studying it when the slip of paper also in the bad fell from its pages and scattered along the ground. He reached down to retrieve it curiously, his eyes scanning over the page once….twice….three times...he opened his mouth in surprise and then closed it again because he wasn’t sure what to say. He cleared his throat and then looked up at Eun for a moment “Should I be saying congratulations or commiserations?” he asked with a concerned look, his brother hadn’t been seeing someone when he left 8 months ago and now he was engaged? This had their father’s influence all over it, he could tell already.

Seeing the happiness exuding out of Jae brought a smile to his lips. His brother is happy, he’s finally happy. Jaesung Moon found the source of his happiness here in a foreign country, far from their home, but is it really home for Jae? Was it even home to Eun? The elder dhampir had no idea what is what, anymore. His head is a big mess when it comes to contemplating things, nowadays. Coming here to Evermore was supposed to settle a few things, and while he could finally give Jae what he was supposed to give, and perhaps, even bask in his baby brother’s company while searching on ways to make the best out of this, that’s only 1/20 of the portion.

A part of him was eternally grateful that Hanseol had left the apartment to them both since what comes next is not exactly something he wished to share with the celestial. Don’t get him wrong, he has nothing against the innocent-looking guy, he wasn’t an outsider per se, since he’s Jae’s boyfriend and subsequently became a part of the family too. At least to him, he is. Eun would love nothing more to see his brother being happy with his current life, and that’s exactly what he came to see. Honestly? He was pleased to see that happening, at least he knows that everything is going on well with Jae. At the end of the day, Eun is still Jae’s big brother, it’s a responsibility he happily carries. How is he going to spill this? Oh god. Where would he even begin?!

“You probably wonder why I’m here in the first place, right?” oh sure, Eun, way to start it off like that. Because that’s always going to go well for you. Evading the truth and prolonging his internal suffering is not what he intended, but that’s exactly what he’s doing. He’s an idiot. “Initially, I came here because one of my clients reside here, so here I am. Two, of course, I’d take the chance to visit my brother. And yes, our parents might have asked me to coerce you into coming back home after you finally see all of this comes to waste,” a smile tugged on his lips faintly, showing just how proud he is for Jae from coming such a long way to this. “Which is obviously wrong of them because all I see is someone thriving pleasantly. You even got yourself a partner, who seems like a good guy. Everything is working out for you, huh?” he inquired softly, keeping his tone leveled but not too enthusiastic. There is no way he’s going to be all that enthusiastic once he spills his part.

Placing a reassuring hold on Jae as he got up from his seat and sat next to the blue-haired male instead of across him, he patted him a few times. “Don’t beat yourself on it, Jae. We all know where we got our stubbornness from, let’s be real” he cracked up, attempting to diffuse that sad atmosphere, besides, what comes next is not exactly a topic he wanted to talk about but needs to talk about with him, of all people. Jae knew Eun better than anyone else. Chuckling tenderly at the mention of Ahri, he misses her too, even though she’s in the same country, the female got transferred to Haeundae that’s all the way in Busan, three months ago. Hyunsik is busy as always, and Eun couldn’t even say much about himself since he’s the same. Everyone’s grown up, already. “Yeah, she’s not exactly subtle..”

The look of horror marring his face when Jae found the invitation card before he even wanted to start things off was inevitable. “Both? I don’t know, Jae… The wedding’s going to happen in like 8 more months, that’s not long now, is it? I don’t know what to do… Coming here was supposed to be my last months of being a bachelor, and I don’t know what to think, that’s why I sought you out… very untimely but what’s new.”

Jae was at a really good place in his life, better than he could have expected when he stood in that airport 8 months ago and said goodbye to his family, of course, there were times he missed his family and wanted to go home but lately those periods were short-lived because Evermore was beginning to feel more like his home than Seoul was. Ever since he was young Jae had been talking about moving to an English speaking country and he supposed his parents always just humored him thinking it was a pipe dream. They had been really shocked when they found out he’d applied and gotten into Evermore University and intended to make the move, in fact, all his family had been quite surprised, except Eun who he suspected had always known Jae was serious.

Jae could already sense from the way Eun was acting and holding himself that the other male had more to say though and so the younger male sat quietly and let him say what he wanted to say “Well it had definitely crossed my mind, it’s not really like you to just fly around the world” not that he was calling his brother unadventurous or anything but he did tend to be the one who always came running when their parents wanted him to. He wasn’t sure that Eun actually knew how to tell them no in any sense of the word. Jae’s teeth worried at his bottom lip as his brother admitted what he already expected which was that his parents were trying to convince him to come home, they had been since the moment he got here and was starting to wonder if he would ever be truly free of their grip over him “I mean I don’t have everything figured out but” he shrugged “I feel a lot better than I ever did back home, I feel more myself here” he nodded slightly as that was his subtle way of thanking his brother for giving him the clear path he needed to do this.

Feeling his brother’s hand against his shoulder he glanced over at him and nodded a little, there was something about being around Eun that always seemed to settle his worries, his brother always had this aura around him that made you feel like things were under control and you didn’t need to worry. Jae knew that came at the cost of his brother’s stress though, you’d have to be blind not to know that Eun shielded him and his other siblings from their parent's expectations by being the perfect son they wanted. And no, they would never compare to him in their parent’s eyes but he was okay with that “You know they’re never going to be okay with...me, right?” he looked back at Eun and gave a soft sigh, if anyone would understand his internal struggle about the person he was now and what it would mean for his family, it was Eun.

And it seemed they both had a bombshell of news to drop, Jae thought as he scanned his eyes over the invitation, he recognized the surname of the girl who he was engaged to but he’d never met her in person though now it occurred to him that the name his brother said earlier might not have been their sister’s as it seemed they had similar names. He watched Eun intently as he asked how he was supposed to reached and then he sighed softly reaching to place a hand against his brother’s back “This was father’s idea wasn’t it” he grumbled knowing the family were very well off and that marrying his son into that family would get him a lot of money. Jae grit his teeth a little annoyed by it all and shook his head from side to side.

He felt for his brother because if he knew his father well enough, he would have gotten their mother behind the idea and guilt tripped Eun into going ahead with it, even if it wasn’t what he wanted for himself. Jae had always been the rebel child, the youngest whom all his siblings doted on and the only one who had told their father no “Do you care for this girl?” he asked curiously, he wasn’t trying to pressure his brother to say he did like his parents probably did, he was just trying to make sense of the situation and understand what he should say about it. He had to admit, this was completely unexpected but the more he thought about it, the less surprised he was that their parents would try and force him into this.

Jae was the only brother Eun could talk to without feeling pressured, it wasn’t as if he couldn’t talk to Hyunsik about it, but that’s exactly what he couldn’t do. He couldn’t even reach out to Ahri even if he wanted to, Eun might’ve been the favorite child in all the Moon siblings, but that doesn’t settle things. In fact, because he is the golden child and the jewel of the family, it’s why he’s in this current mess that he couldn’t find a way to get out of. The arranged marriage sounded like something that just came out of a soap opera, or any Korean daily dramas their sister and mother would often binge watch every day. But no, this time, it’s real. There’s not getting out for him, no escape route, no exit door, nothing. It wasn’t as if Eun could outrightly tell his parents no, there are plenty of reasons why the eldest Moon would not do that.

One, their mother is currently sick, the last thing he wanted to do is give her a potential cardiac arrest. Two, she really wanted to have a grandchild before she goes away, it had been a discussion between their family a few months ago when she first fell sick. Mama Moon is only a human, after all. Their father is uptight and strict, but as strict as he is, he loves his wife dearly, and so did Eun. Their mother had been the only one out of the two parental figures in his life that actually bothered to take care of him while he was growing up. The countless nights where she would reward him with sweets and suppress those tearful cries whenever he’s scolded by their father. Hyunsik is too tied up to his work as a doctor to even meet anyone, Ahri is still considered young and reckless to commit herself to a marriage when she’s only about 2 years older than the youngest, Jae.

Speaking of Jae, he wasn’t even an option. Their father wouldn’t try to marry him off because that would mean wrath from his side and Eun would rather have their family argue than broken up. He’s the most suitable option, he’s 29, nearing 30 this year. He’s supposed to be the one who carries the legacy with him. So when Jae left 8 months ago to pursue his studies in America, Eun desperately wished he would’ve taken the elder dhampir with him. How he wished he could escape this life. “I can still come and visit my baby brother if I put my mind to it, you know” he rolled his eyes, feigning annoyance following Jae’s remark about him flying out here. “You’re being incredibly disrespectful to your big brother, Jae. Has the American way got into your head?” he poked teasingly, but the smile didn’t seem to hold on as long because he was reminded of what he came here to do, other than to give Jae his belated birthday gifts. The dhampir did manage to keep holding on to the smile when Jae expressed how happy he’s been ever since he set his foot in Evermore.

“Well, you got yourself a boyfriend too, that’s unexpected but not surprising. I’m still offended that you were able to find love before me, though. Hanseol seems like a good guy, attractive too, you really did get lucky, didn’t you? Or did he get lucky, with you?” He had no doubt that the celestial is the lucky one, anyone would be lucky if they got Jae. “I’m just glad you feel better here, I had faith you would achieve great things outside of that country, and you defied every thought our parents had. You flourished.” Upon hearing the worries settling inside Jae’s tone about how their parents wouldn’t accept this, the dark-haired dhampir sighed heavily before patting his shoulders comfortingly. “It doesn’t matter, you’re happy, Jae. That’s what’s important. Not every one of us has to turn out the way our parents wanted. I’ll take care of that, you just focus on living your life happily. It’s what you deserve. You’ve been suppressed from your talents and potentials for long, it’s time you let it out and venture within it,” his hand found the back of Jae’s neck, where he rubbed his fingers softly against it. Eun used to massage Jae when they were kids, though it seemed so long ago.

“They won’t be happy with you. I’m not gonna lie about that. But in time, I’m sure they’ll accept all of this. What parent wouldn’t want to see their child happy? And even if they find it hard still, you have me. You always did, and you always will.” Eun would never leave Jae on his own, perhaps the distance may separate them but their bond will only grow stronger because of it. No doubt Jae would recognize the surname, Ahreum Kim is not known as the heiress to a diamond cartel for no reason. Her entire family is the definition of wealthy conglomerates. The only times he’s ever met the family in person was during charity fundraisers that he went to, under the incessant nagging from their mother saying he’s well-respected enough to be climbing up the social ladder now. If his goal was to be the district’s attorney, then perhaps it’s coming to fruition. “I met them before he did, but once he found out of the slight interest they showed me, he jumped straight to it. It’s father, Jae. What’s new about it, anymore?” That was Eun sadly indicating that he was to abide by everything the patriarch of their family would say. His word is quite literally the law for him.

He was taken aback by the sudden question, did he care for her? “I’ve met her a few times at the charity fundraisers that her family threw, and occasionally at the courthouse for some reason, she’s a kind girl. You know I’ve never had any experience head-on for love and attraction, Jae. I never had time. I don’t even know what it means, but do I care for her in the slightest manner ever? Sure. I don’t want to let anyone down… mother wants one of us to marry soon, she wants a grandchild, mind you” he chuckled.

Jae had always been the rebellious one of their family, the one who always refuted what their mother and father wanted in the name of doing what he thought was best. Sometimes he did so directly to their face, such as asking to study in America rather than in Korea, others he did behind their backs. He didn’t regret giving in the person he really was and as much as letting them down and having them turn their backs on him terrified him. He’d resigned himself to the fact that he couldn’t just keep living a lie in their name. Eun had always done as they told him to do though, he’d never once seen his brother talk back to their father or do anything less than be the perfect son which Jae was constantly told to live up to. Jae probably would have resented Eun if the two of them weren’t so close and the younger male understood how much the elder wished things could be different.

That didn’t mean Jae didn’t care about his family or worry for them, worrying was all he had done over the past few months since finding out their mother was in the hospital, he knew it was bad and had suggested he come home to visit several times but Ahri had assured him not to come back. In a way, his elder sister always seemed to be protecting him too. It didn’t stop him from wondering how she was doing or looking intently on the screen at her whenever they would talk over Skype, seeing the way her face looked frailer and weaker each time, it was slowly tearing Jae apart too. When Eun called him disrespectful in a teasing manner, Jae bowed his head a little “I’m really glad you’re here hyung” he admitted with a soft smile, he missed his family, he missed talking to them each and every day.

Jae smiled softly as they talked about Hanseol, he could talk about his fallen star all day, every day and still not get bored but he didn’t want to rub his happiness in his brother’s face too much “I’m definitely the lucky one” he admitted with no hesitation in his voice or his smile “He’s everything I ever dreamed of finding in someone and I didn’t even know I was looking” he hadn’t been trying to find a date, hadn’t even crossed his mind until he found himself developing feelings for a fallen star. Jae never expected to find his first love in Hanseol but somehow that just made it feel all the more special. The way his brother accepted him without any question or doubt, that meant more to him that Jae could ever express into words. He leaned into his brother’s touch against his shoulders “I just wish they could understand, you know, I wish not only me but you and Hyungsik and Ahri could have the same freedom, it feels selfish” of course going back now wouldn’t change that, it would just make his parents think they won.

He closed his eyes as he felt the rub against his neck and he was instantly taken back to when they were much younger, Jae had annoyed the hell out of Eun back then but somehow his brother always seemed to have a soft spot for him. He knew better than to expect their father to ever accept his choices, he knew exactly the path he was leading down, but the assurance he wouldn’t lose his brother in the process of choosing this. That was enough. “Good because I really don’t know what I’d do without you” he admitted with a soft nod of his head, he truly meant that, his elder brother meant so much to him, he talked about him so much, he was everything he aspired to be. Not the perfect image he gave their parents but the caring, selfless guy Jae knew he was.

Jae’s eyes were studying Eun intently as he talked about this whole situation, he wanted to know how this had all played out, how his brother felt in this situation and what he could do to be the supportive brother he wanted to be. “Nothing’s new, our father cares more for our family’s image than he does the people who are part of it” his tone was a little bitter, he always hated how his father would brag about his children to his friends and show them off like they were prizes he kept on a shelf. Make one slip up and he would ignore you for weeks. He was a harsh and sometimes cruel man. “But Eun this isn’t just school or your career, this is your entire future” Jae pointed out with empathetic eyes.

Jae was direct with his question, he wanted the truth from his brother, not the fabricated story his parents would give him or the glorified sacrifice Eun was making in the name of bringing pride to their family. Jae pressed his lips together taking in all the information he had been given before he spoke “I know you probably don’t want to hear this but” he paused for a moment “I think this is a really bad idea” someone had to tell Eun how big of a mistake this might be, he knew his brother probably wouldn’t listen to him and would go ahead with the wedding regardless but he didn’t feel right just telling him anything but the truth on what he thought “You were always there to tell me when I was being an idiot so this is me telling you, don’t marry someone you could never love” Jae pursed his lips “Don’t torture yourself like that” he would support Eun in whatever he decided but he would never condemn what their father was doing to him to get what he wanted.

He missed him, he truly did. He misses his baby brother so much. Jae had been his company when he was staying late up on those endless nights being buried with papers. He would often call him just to chat with him because honestly, it wasn’t as if the elder Moon had anyone else to talk to. Despite his status in the school, he wasn’t one to have many friends, hell, he wasn’t sure if he had a real one apart from his co-workers or acquaintances. That was as far as they went; acquaintances. Nothing more. But Eun couldn’t say no to anything, that’s his biggest weakness ever. Sangeun Moon could never shake his head and reject anything without coming with a more resolute reason to say that. It worked well for him, but most of them, it worked well against him. His parents usually used that to make sure his leash is intact, as cruel and inhumane as that sounds.

 That’s precisely the reason for his agreement and consent about the wedding that was going to unveil in 8 more months. 8 months seemed like a short period of time now that he thought of it. What is he going to do? It seems like the more he thought about trying to evade from this, the more he found himself trapped inside, entangled with the strings that kept him upwards even when he was soulless and empty inside. He was glad that he found Jae today, there was so many that he wanted to talk to with him that simply could not be done on the phone. It needed to be said face to face. The elder dhampir knew how worried his brother has been, especially when their mother fell sick the other day and had been in and out of the hospital like it was her second home. Of course, he wouldn’t say that to him. Was it bad of him if he kept the seriousness of the issue aside to make sure his brother wouldn’t feel as burdened as he already felt?

 Eun saw it as an act of being a good brother by sparing him the guilt and worries. But at the same time, he couldn’t lie to him. Dammit, Jae. “I’m glad to be here, Jae,” he returned the smile comfortingly and fiddled with his hands before meeting his gaze once again. “I probably should say this… because I can’t keep it from you. Mom is fine, Hyunsik didn’t really disclose how serious it’s been though. I didn’t know it until I found out on my own. He’s not really subtle in locking his offices and forget that his brother can find out stuff if he wants to. So I did some digging and well, I can’t say I’m surprised why he didn’t say the full details. Leukemia, Jae,” he placed a reassuring hold on his shoulders, pursing his lips lightly. “It’s still treatable, and we should just trust Hyunsik, there’s probably a reason he kept it from us, right?” Eun being Eun had obviously decided to take the optimistic road. When he first found out about it, the dhampir was livid that such importance wasn’t notified to them, but tried to understand why he did what he did. Eun had always been so weak for his family, this shouldn’t be weird even for him. 

His grin grew, knowing his brother is happy and content with the life he’s leading now. “I’m glad you’re happy, Jae. I guess it is true about the whole thing where they find you when you needed them the most,” he paused momentarily as if he was trying to rack his head for more, “wait, or was it you find happiness when you least expect it?” he shook his head giving up trying to comprehend the quotes from famous literature works. Regardless of being raised in a rather close-minded and conservative society, Eun never frowned over anyone, so knowing that his brother is happy with a man, that shouldn’t change a thing because Jae’s happiness is what’s important to him. “They’ll come around. It might take time, but they will. Once they see how happy you are… they have to,” was he convincing Jae or himself? “Even if they don’t, we’re here.” He couldn’t handle to see the look of sadness on Jae’s face, it made his heart aches.  “You’ll flop without me, let’s be real” he winked and his hands formed a finger gun, shooting it at Jae teasingly. After breaking that devastating news about his wedding and their mother’s health condition, he needed to brighten the mood. 

When he felt the bitter tone underlying Jae’s words, he pressed his lips into a thin line and shrugged wryly. “That’s the way it’s been…” don’t get him wrong, Eun respected their father, but sometimes it gets too much. Of course, Jae would tell him it’s a bad idea. It actually is. Arranged marriage, it’s 2019, it’s the 21st century, who even does that any more? Apparently, they do. “Jae… It’s already been set, I was already engaged. We had the engagement ceremony a month ago, I just don’t want to upset our parents… especially our mother who desperately wants to see one of us married,” the burden of that weight rests on top of him, it’s beginning to wear him out. “I don’t want to disappoint them... “ But Jae wasn’t wrong either, it feels as if his heart is playing tug of war right now. “Maybe I can learn to love her? Is.. is that possible?”

Growing up, Eun had always been the sibling that Jae looked up to most, he was the eldest and his father’s prodigy, he was the one who got to train with their father, who was an expert in all things, the person his parents raved about to their friends and showed off. Jae was seen at the rebellious but lovable youngest child which had its perks and drawbacks, for one, he did feel a lot like he was always in his brother’s shadow which could be hard when everyone was telling him to be more like Eun but on the other side, the expectations put on him were nowhere near what his brother stomached through which definitely made Jae’s life much easier by comparison. But Jae wasn’t stupid enough to miss the toll that took on his brother, he knew his brother had dreams much bigger than the ones his parents wanted for him and he feared those pressures would make him miss out on some of the best things in life.

Jae was watching him intently while they talked, having spent the majority of his life around his brother, he knew how to read him better than most people, he could tell when he was saying things just for the sake of saying them, he knew his little tells that screamed that he was nervous or concerned and he was picking up on a few of them right now. His eyes dropped to his hands in his lap which he was busying, not a good sign, Jae swallowed and rolled his shoulders back preparing for what he had to say. He felt his heart lurch in his chest the moment he spoke the word and all words seemed to fall out of his vocabulary, he opened his mouth to speak but there was nothing there, his eyes teared up as he watched him, nodding his head a little as he explained it was treatable “I should have come home” he spoke weakly as he leaned into his touch “It’s not fair” he spoke softly as he reached up to wipe them away.

It was a big contrast to the life he was now living in Evermore, one he had found happiness he had never even known existed before. The truth was, Jae didn’t want to go home and face his parents, he didn’t want to hear his father belittle his dreams or his mother tell him how he was going to settle down with a nice Korean girl one day and have children. That was their life, their dream, but his was right here in Evermore, with Han. “I think both of them work” he chuckled softly in response to the expressions he used and he pursed his lips. His brother was ever the optimist but Jae couldn’t let himself be optimistic when it came to his parents because every time he had ever tried that, they had done exactly the worst, it had taken months of begging to get them to let him move to America and even now they were expecting him to come running back to their arms by the end of it and let them tell him they told him so “I wish I could be as optimistic as you” he spoke gently but smiled as he tried to lighten the mood “I’m just glad I still have you” he admitted with a nod and he was pretty sure if he got to break the news to her himself, Ahri would understand too “And I think Han and Ahri would get along really well, they’re both such big animal lovers” he nodded a little, a lot of things Han did reminded him of his sister.

Jae could see the conflict in his brother’s eyes, he could tell this wasn’t what he wanted for himself, that he was walking a path he knew he couldn’t return from and yet he was doing it anyway, his brother always had this sense of duty to make his family proud and Jae supposed this shouldn’t be a surprise to him, their parents wanted grandchildren to carry on the family line and Eun was almost 30 now. “I don’t care if it’s set and you’re walking down the aisle tomorrow, I’d still tell you not to” he spoke it sternly as he looked up at him “You know I’ll always stand by you whatever you decide to do but I would have wanted someone to vote no for me” he sighed slightly “Even though I know you won’t listen and will go through with it anyway” he reached up and took a hold of his shoulder and squeezed it slightly “I don’t either, but I also can’t be someone I’m not anymore” which was why he was working so hard to be financially free of his parent’s influence as soon as he possibly could.

When he spoke about learning to love someone Jae sucked in a breath “I’m not an expert in that” he admitted with a grimace “But I guess you could try, if you’re going through with this then you owe it to yourself to try” he met his gaze sternly, he understood his conflict well, he felt the same thing every day and he was still afraid to break that tie but Jae knew if he was made to choose between the relationship with his parents and the future he dreamed for himself, he wouldn’t be able to choose to be miserable for the rest of his life. 

The longer he stared at Jae, the more he felt the doubt filling in every blank space in his heart, and that was saying something considering he had a very empty one as of late due to it being filled with nothing but worries. It started a little over a month ago when he got engaged, and it had been bugging him ever since. But what was he supposed to say? No? Like that is gonna work with his parents, it didn’t help that Ahreum’s parents were very hopeful to have him as their son-in-law either. And he knew, in all his years paying service as a lawyer, the Kims were not a family you want to cross. They may look kind on the outside but they do not bode well with rejection. He was saving his family basically. And perhaps, himself. Jae had always been the family rebel, and Eun never saw it as something burdensome. The eldest Moon would never say Jae is a bother, in fact, he was the only person he could actually talk to without being tattled to their parents. 

For the longest time ever, Eun’s actions and movements were always reported back to their parents, especially their father; a strict man who only ever wanted the best for his family. That’s a problem too, unfortunately. Their father is a great man, someone who would always take care of his family. But sometimes, his decisions weren’t always the best for all. His children usually got the backlash, for their father would not tolerate imperfection. Eun remember his mother telling him when he was a kid, that their father went through a lot in his youthful days, and wished nothing of the same would happen to his progenies. History usually repeats itself. When Jae finally had the permission from their parents who eventually relented after countless coercion from the youngest Moon, Eun admitted he was partially envious. His baby brother got to leave and he couldn’t even come here for work. While he was battling with his inner emotions, he noticed something from Jae, from the corner of his eye he could feel the stare the other male was giving him and suddenly, he could feel his palms getting sweaty. Calm down, Eun, he told himself. 

He was usually a good actor because honestly, bending down to other people’s will or want, even up to appeasing them, that’s what Sangeun Moon does best. It was why he rose up to his rank today too. What? Being righteous and chivalrous wasn’t enough to make up everything. He had to know when to play his cards, but neither of them usually had the intention of deceiving others, so that’s fine. At least that’s what he tells himself. This is to make sure everyone goes home happy. He knew the moment he spilled about the truth regarding their mother, Jae wasn’t going to take it very well. Nobody would. He remembered crying and sobbing for an entire day because he was so busy with his work and thought their human mother was just unwell due to her increasing age. Imagine his reaction when he found out, it was already a hint when he barged into Hyunsik’s office one day and demanded to know the authenticity of the reports and had to even shove his brother to the wall while doing so. Eun had behaved so erratically and he was ashamed of himself. Perhaps… just perhaps, Jae didn’t need to know about that detail. 

Surprisingly, Jae seemed to show a good composure which made him gape in awe, his heart swelling with pride upon seeing the control his brother exhibited. Even if it hurts him in the inside, he didn’t display it fully and he applauded him for it. Watching as Jae wiped the brimming tears earlier, he pressed his lips into a thin line and placed a reassuring hold on his shoulder, rubbing against it softly as he leaned close, “You should study and make your dreams come true, Jae. I understand the sentiment of wanting to come back, and maybe this is harsh but it needed to be said, do you think father will leave you alone then? He would not stop pestering you and with our mother’s condition, you’ll feel even more guilty…” he whispered softly, he didn’t want him to go through a period of questioning his own self. It wasn’t a pleasant period. “Don’t worry, Jae… she was discharged already, she only has to attend her medical checkups and we have Hyunsik who can treat her at home, I believe in the best. Worrying would not do any good for either of us. I know she wouldn’t want that for us.”

 Reassuring his brother wasn’t easy when he wasn’t even convinced but that’s what he could do at the moment. When Jae said he wished he was as optimistic as him, that caused the elder dhampir to purse his lips and his eyebrows were furrowed, “Don’t say that, Jae. You know the glory, but sometimes being a realist is a lot better than to be an optimist or pessimist. Opt for that instead,” pausing momentarily to take in his brother sitting near him, he sighed, “Don’t… change yourself for anyone, brother. You’re already good as yourself… don’t feel the need to change for anyone else. If you want to change yourself for the better, do it for yourself. Your own sake.” Maybe he couldn’t do it, but that doesn’t mean he couldn’t advise others. “I’m glad I have you too” he murmured faintly but still audible enough for the other dhampir to hear, his head felt so heavy and it wasn’t even about work, he was just glad they changed the topic quickly, the smile on Jae’s face made him beam all the same, “They would? Is he a vet like our sister too? Be careful, she might steal him away, you know how our sister is when she sees someone attractive” he cooed teasingly, chuckling softly because their sister could also be a handful. 

The stern undertone in his words when he talked about him walking down the aisle made Eun drop his head down, he was embarrassed, “I don’t know what to do, Jae… I want to fulfill our mother’s wish before it’s too late, I feel conflicted with how things are going” their mother is one compassionate angel, she cares about them greatly but sometimes she could be oblivious to what her kids actually wanted and viewed it as some sort of a phase instead. “Hey, you’d be at my wedding, right?” With the way he looked right now, Eun could easily be mistaken as a dog begging its owner to give in, he was lost. “I’ve been trying to evade this for a while now… I don’t know what road I can take. There’s nothing else I can do.” Eun nodded in understanding, of course Jae couldn’t. And that is all fine by him. He’ll shoulder any burden to allow his younger siblings to get a better path in life, the last thing he wanted for them is for them to question their own desires. He can handle this. Or so he says. “I don’t even know what love is… and I wanted to love someone else… that feels like a joke to me.”

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