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Bexley’s downfall often came in the form of her diaries, she learned a long time ago that she needed to document everything in her own language or else someone could take something important from her. So she had been locked away in her secret room reading through her diaries one after the other desperate to find something to bring back Crane, and the others who lose their lives in the fall of the Isle. She looked at the photo of Crane and her holding one another feeling tears in her eyes. “How dare you, save me.” She said to the photo like she did every day. Blaming herself for his death the most.
Turning back to her reading she raised her brow as she came across a name. She couldn’t place a face to the name though. She tried so hard feeling the blood dripping from her nose as she tried to picture the face. Confusion crossed the dark diviner's face, she kept reading though learning that the reason she couldn’t remember the person was because Reus took her memory of the person. She wrote that they were extremely dangerous and that it was for the best. “I need to know.” She said to herself and closed the diary page and took a deep breath. She knew she could teleport into his room where the doors to the hall of memories. Yet getting past the doors would test her lock picking skills.
She searched her home finding her lockpicking kit. She opened a portal to his room hoping since it was mid day he would be off doing something. As she stepped through the portal she looked over her shoulder. All clear. She needed to be quick. She moved the entrance to the hall of memories. Seeing the door was unlocked, meaning he must be in his hall. “Fuck.” she said under her breath and pushed the door open slowly and slipped in. Standing quietly for a moment listening for him, but not hearing him. So she moved along the back wall taking the long way to where she knew the guards memories where. She worked quickly, finding the orbs that sat there, searching for hers.
She stood there a moment seeing there was more than one. Causing her brows to push together, how many times had she asked him to remove a memory. She didn’t have time to focus on this but she opened her bag and stuffed a few of the small orbs into her back and went to take her leave from the memory room. She managed to make it back into his room. She moved to open a portal before hearing her name with a sigh she turned around to the memory hall door that opened and gave the best smile she could. Even though it didn’t touch her eyes. “Reus, I was coming to see if you needed any help with a mission but saw you where in your hall. So I figured I would just go check in with the other aspects.”
He hated hearing how little she thought of her existence in this world. Some days he wished he could shake the diviner and somehow make Bex see reason and sense. Aureus put an arm around both her shoulders before pulling her against him for a moment, resting his chin to the top of her head. He gave a gentle squeeze before just as quickly letting Bexley go. Attempting to give anymore affection would only prove awkward for them both since neither was great at the emotion. He motioned to sit down with him on the couch before taking a breath. He hated keeping the secrets he did and Bex was not the first. Pulling all those memories from people meant he knew things others didn't and wanted to forget. Trying to keep it all straight was maddening at times, but specifically with Bex, it was to keep her safe as well as potentially the entire timeline.
"I don't know.." he said, looking to her and folding his hands together as he leaned forward onto his knees to consider her request. "It could be dangerous to flood them all back in. Maybe a few at a time, but you have to make peace with his decision, Bex. He wouldn't want to see you this way. If the roles were reversed, I know you would've saved him in a second without a thought to your own life as well. Would you want him to agonize over the choice you had made to save him? Living in this guilt and grief you are still feeling? You would want him to continue and push forward, living his life to the fullest. You can't tell me he wouldn't want that for you now."
As much as that was the truth, there was something else that concerned Aureus even more. Giving back her past with Crane could solve some of the issues with her spotty memory and perhaps keep her satiated, stopping her pursuit of gathering what she'd forgotten. However, the Aspect had to keep vigil for some of the memories that he could not return to her. He hated having to keep the secret and he had hoped for so long that it would somehow stay gone, but Bexley could not see remnants of the spell she had stumbled upon. He knew all of the promises she was making now would shatter in an instant if there was some small chance of getting him back.
Protection of his element above all else. What a burden to bear.
As his arms moved around her she felt her body tense under the action. Feeling him trying to comfort her made her want to either push him away or crumble. She was caught in an in-between state that just turned into an awkward moment of her holding her arms open but not fully placing them around him to hug him back. As he motioned for her to sit down she shifted and sat back down on the couch that her loving cat had betrayed her and showed the aspect what she had taken from him. She folded her hands in her lap as she waited for more yelling, anger, and scolding even though the mood had seemed to fully shift into somberness.
She kept her eyes on his hands for a long moment as she felt those tears spilling over silently wanting to keep her face hidden from the Aspect. She felt so weak, something she utterly hated. “A few at a time, they come back anyways. There is no point in having you constantly taking them from me. I need to accept the pain that I am agonizing with as is. I am not allowing myself to grieve his loss every time I have asked you to take those memories.” struggling through the statements not wanting him to hear her tears in her voice and yet she couldn’t stop it being so either. She frowned deeply as she finally looked up to him with the tears rolling down her face.
“No, I wouldn't want him to agonize over the choice I made if I had been the one to save him. Though knowing Crane he would have moved one easily. I am nothing special. He was one of a kind.” she reached up to collect her tears from her face looking at them as they made a small pool in her palm. “I know, I know he wants me to move on and live my life. Just feels wrong I guess.” clearing her throat she shifted in her seat for a jar and placed her tears there for later use in a spell if needed.
She reached up and tucked her hair behind her ear and let out a soft breath before looking back to him. She tilted her head trying to read him. She gave a soft hum before she moved and held the book out to him that she had borrowed from Malva. “Take it back for me?” she asked as she looked back to the phone. “Still wanna eat?”
Aureus closed his eyes for a moment as she agreed to have her memories back. He thought it was the best and worst thing for her. Sitting next to Bex still, he laced his fingers and tried to decide what was true. In the end, it wasn't his right to hold onto what she wanted forgotten. It was just a mercy he gave to others, especially the ones who had been through and seen the worst of what life could give. He also hated having the knowledge of what people had felt and gone through while they knew nothing of it after he'd stored away their discarded memories. It felt like an invasion of privacy to the most intimate fractures of crumbling lives.
"Bexley, you are special," he said softly, looking over to her then. "You and every Guard that joins the Ailwards. You wouldn't have been able to step foot on that Isle otherwise. Not everyone can be in the position you're in right now and it's because you are special. Unique. Needed. You have to realize that otherwise you wouldn't be part of this faction meant to keep the world safe. I wish you could see it. I see it. Crane saw it."
He watched as the diviner collected the tears of sorrow that fell softly down her face. He'd never seen Bexley this emotional beyond the flashbacks he'd been through when she'd asked for him to start removing bits of her life. Reus accepted the book from her and nodded, giving a reassuring smile when she asked if he wanted to eat. "Sure, you still pick. Anything Japanese is good for me, though make sure it's ramen that's the star."
Once her attention was away again at ordering, Reus glanced at the orbs waiting to be broken, and the memories seeping back to their owner. The dilemma was now making a knot in his stomach. He couldn't let her see the spell that could possibly alter the timeline should she be successful or even if she failed miserably and something worse occurred. Then what? She would still see the bits of memory seep back in and find the missing pieces to the spell somewhere down the road. There didn't seem to be any way to prevent what he feared most of all.