Malva knew it from the very beginning that she wasn't going to last long without her siblings. It's nothing regarding their strength and life as one entity. It wasn't that she wasn't independent. If it was up to her, she would've withdrawn herself from everyone from the start, but there was a reason why she couldn't. She could never live alone without going insane. Not now. And maybe, not ever. Not after what she's gone and been through. The dried tears that stained her pale complexion has been there since a few hours ago. The Aspect of Magic did not bother to wipe it away, and left it be as she descended into the state of being a broken girl. Hugging her knees as she shivered under the pre-winter weather, where she wore only one layer of a dark blue dress, it was almost the first time since forever that she felt the cold. She grew up in North America that was Atlanta when she was a Fae, and hailed from the cold harsh Russia, so the cold didn't bother her as much. But now, she could feel every single tingle.

Her room was a mess. Books and parchments were scattered all around the spacious space. The windows were wide open; the cold wind blowing through the curtains from the balcony and into the room. There were also a few broken glasses on the floor alongside broken paintings that had their fair share of blood staining it like a new addition of paint. Unfortunately, the room wasn't the only thing that was a mess. The person that is Malva Ailward who looked nothing more than a traumatized puppy, was hugging her knees as she settled down on the carpeted floor, trembling in what could seem to be fear and distraught. Her slightly lighter shade of hair was unkempt and her hands were also stained with blood. She knew she should've known better better than to attempt that on her own, without anyone being present for backup. Without anyone that would bring her back. Without anyone that could bring her back. And most importantly, without anyone that could comfort her. 

She was sure she would've been so far gone if she didn't try to get herself out in the last minute. The Russian born woman was too deep in her thoughts to notice that she was in fact, drifting away. The tears began to stream down her puffy cheeks, for it resumed its pace when the dragon covered her face with both hands and cried some more. Malva couldn't remember the last time she had been so affected and scared. All that anger dissipated and was replaced by a monumental moment of contempt.

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8 hours earlier...

Malva has been away from Evermore ever since she had a new personal mission that required her utmost attention. And by personal, it meant that it wasn't known to her siblings. She has been venturing back and forth to Atlanta for the past week. Yet she wasn't anywhere near closer to where she was supposed to be. It caused the Aspect of Magic to be very distressed and has been then, trying to do everything she could that was within her power. But now she was back in Evermore, specifically her room, where she has been busy searching for god knows what. She's been too deprived off proper and decent healthiness for a while and it was starting to take its effects on the Aspect. However, an hour later, she found the item she sought out. There, it was laid before her eyes, the ancient book that contained all the dark arts that were quite the malpractice back in the early centuries; especially the late 15th century. It was exactly the very thing she needed for references to aid her current search.

Breaking off the boundary spell that kept the grimoire sealed for centuries long, Malva opened the first page and began to skim through the old pages. Her steely blue hues were analyzing the book carefully, Because if she wasn't careful, she could end up getting a bit too immersed in it and she does not want that to ever occur in her lifetime. The Aspect of Magic was inexplicably weak and incompetent when it comes to dark magic and she finds it burdensome when she needed to intervene directly.

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Long story short, the flaxen haired Ailward didn't expect for her magic to backfire on her so aggressively since it has never happened before, without any notice. And she was then thrust into the world where darkness looms over, in her head. She felt the effect taking up to her and spent hours trying to evade them. But it was her own terrors, how could she truly get rid of it. It will always be there. She called out for her siblings, but most specifically, she had called out the person who had witnessed this side of her beforehand; Aureus. Malva had probably woken him up from the small sleep he could have as she called for him loudly in his mind. The Aspect of Magic curled herself up in the corner as she tried to close her eyes shut and push every thoughts away that was plaguing her.

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The days and nights were weighing heavily on his shoulders, the feeling of unrest and like he was on unsteady ground with his life and the city was ever present. There was something which just didn’t sit well with the Aspect of Time, there didn’t seem to be any visible reasoning for his discomfort but something was bothering him on a deep level that eluded his understanding. His mind whirling throughout the day as if trying to place pieces together into a puzzle which didn’t currently exist. It was the definition of insanity to be sure but it was hard for him to claim sanity in the past century or so. Everything would in someway work out though and his over active mind was likely making something out of nothing, yet a small voice in the back of his mind told him that it wasn’t just his healing mind making things up.

Tossing and turning was his norm at night and trying to trying to get to sleep was no easy task, relying on herbal mixtures, aroma therapy and even at times sleeping droughts from Malva. Every being needed rest at some point and if an Aspect pushed themselves to exhaustion it could get dangerous. His eye lids had finally closed his lashes no rustling against his pillow as his body and mind settled into sleep holding a silent hope that they nightmare wouldn’t come, not tonight. It seemed his silent urging was answered his dreams remaining on the bright side of life, memories of sparing with his siblings, his wedding, the easy jests and banters which used to come when his family had once been whole. Before a single decision had caused fractures to form in a once unbreakable bond. Reus wouldn’t have minded living within those happy dreams and resorting the past to the way it should have been if only that were possible but it wasn’t.

A quiet and peaceful lunch in the garden was disrupted as the splintering sound of his sister’s voice resounded through his mind echoing across the plans and shattering the dream Aureus was within. A shuttered breath left him as he bolted up in his own bed his heart pounding within his ears at the utterly broken sound of his sister’s voice. Turning his body, his feet touched the floor before he stood in a hasty manner grabbing a forgotten shirt off of one of the high backed wooden chairs not far from the bed. Pulling the fabric over his head he quickly left his room in his pajama pants and plan grey t-shirt heading to the very person who was calling out of him in turmoil and torment. What was going on? His feet made quick work of the stairs as he traveled across the house not bothering to pound his fist against the thick wooden door to Malva’s room, instead opening and walking in without question.

“Malva…” Her name rushed from his lips as he ran to her side his hand resting to press against her forehead and her skin was like ice. Quickly he moved to close the window which was pulling the chilling air into the room a deep scowl etched into his features as Constance growled low at him. “I’m not trying to hurt her, I’m trying to help her. I’m one of the last people you need to guard her from.” He told the big cat as he moved back to the Aspect of Magic who looked ever the young girl he and Ven had stumble upon all those centuries ago. Grabbing the thick blanket from her bed he wrapped it around her shivering body keeping his arm wrapped around her. “Shush, just breathe.” He said softly knowing it had been a rather long since he had seen Malva in such a state, her room an utter disaster and her own blood was covering many objects surrounding them.

“Malva,” His voice was even and full of concern, lacking the anger so might assume he would have in this situation, “What happened? What did you do?” He asked softly trying to calm her as they sat leaning against her wall together. Something seemed to have snapped within her and an old fear began to rise within him, a time when she’d began to slip into herself and into darkness and that couldn’t happen again. Not now, not here and not ever as far as he was concerned.

The shivers she experienced were inevitable, such as the moment. There was no escaping so easily and only this time, she wasn't sure if she could properly get her head back into the game of reality before letting the waves wash her off, leaving her to her ultimate doom-- the start of her own untimely demise. It was only unfortunate that it had chosen this time of all times to strike, as if it knew how vulnerable she was to amount those attacks without having the same power to retaliate in the same manner. Despite her attempts to keep her eyes shut in pushing all those nightmares from protruding her head like sharpened needles, she only managed to wince occasionally because it truly did hurt. If it was possible to bleed over them, she was sure it would've happened by now. Malva kept being bombarded with a sack filled with bad memories of her past, and now, figments of her torturous future. What else hasn't she bagged up already, at this point.

There was a nauseous bile that was restricted under her throat and it really wasn't helping the lack of air she's been getting. But it sure wasn't coming from the winter cold weather gracing its presence in her room, mentally and physically-- Malva Ailward was utterly and incorrigibly exhausted. Repeating her eldest brother's name was only the small hint that she needed someone to come to her room and shake off her state, no matter how mild it might be. The Aspect of Magic was sure, that she only needed someone to keep her anchored to the reality that she's at. Just for a little while longer. The moment her door was opened, she had her half-lidded gaze on the door. Aureus’ silhouette was one she recognized very distinctly, much like the rest of her siblings. Her attentive gaze was however, averted away as she tried to stop the jittering in her bones. She could hear the clock that was hung across the room, ticking, as if everything else didn't matter in the current space.  

Constance was up on her feet as fast as it could take her and was growling lowly towards Aureus, to which Malva couldn't even be bothered to tell her off this time. The now- 7 month old Siberian tiger cub wasn't really intimidating as she appeared to be, considering how much the middle Ailward Aspect spoiled her. Still just as lethal as her built, but unless there was any real danger, she was to stay at her spot so no actual harm would've befell her brother. When the Aspect of Time wrapped a blanket around her, she only shuddered against his touch before tugging on it firmly to cover herself up. She knew she would need to answer anything that he asked her, because lying wasn't really an option for her, at the moment. Whilst trying to steady her breath from her uneven pace previously, Malva was able to keep a standard one soon enough. Her tear-stained eyes made her blue hues look more twinkling under the moonlight that shone through the balcony.

Without much to speak at first, she only nodded towards the book that was sprawled out near her. Granted, there was a few others scattered on the floor just as well, but the particular book that was close to her by only a few centimeters, was exuding a rather negative energy around it. The book was intricately designed; with the spine of the book carved out amazingly with handcrafted skills, and the words surrounding every single page under every bottom of it. It was written coarsely on the book cover ‘Blood Magic'. Now why would Malva attempt such a powerful and volatile form of magic that hasn't been practiced since the late 15th century? There could only mean one thing-- she was trying to understand it, and in order to understand them in a deeper and spiritual level, she needed to connect with it. Worst case scenario, she should be able to feel the magic spiraling out from her, but unfortunately she didn't. Hence, the result of her current state.

“I tried to delve myself back into the ancient teachings.. I didn't think it would be too much for me.” One thing known to everyone else; Malva was rarely a giving up person. She doesn't try to evade from all possibilities, and though disappointing as it may be, she was actually persistent enough to get through it. She doesn't know how to stop. Period.

Aureus quieted his rapid fire questions as he held his sister protectively in his embrace feeling true fear for the first time since the fall of the Isle of Skye. His siblings were everything to him regardless of it they saw eye to eye or not, they were all he had for so many centuries and he had seen them all struggle through a lot in life. His lips brushed against the side of her head trying to sooth her, carefully of contact with her actual skin since in her state there was a chance she was projecting and he knew her memories were a dangerous thing to them both. Despite the strong amount of control he had over his own element, it was still hard not to see memories when people where in the state of mind that Malva currently was and he knew how much of an invasion of privacy that could be. It was how he had truly found out about Lailah’s past with her father before she was ready to tell him and it led to a rather large blowout in the mansion. It was something he truly tried to avoid now, especially with those close to him.

Constance continued to growl softly at him but there was an intelligence within her hues seemed to speak of her understanding on the current matter as the volume of her noises began to decrease. Despite Reus having been the one to bring Constance into the mansion for Malva, her loyalties were rather clear and the Aspect of Time didn’t really mind since Malva wasn’t the sort to allow people in so Constance was at least a creature his sister could turn to and trust. Though that also meant the big cat was always far from enthused or excited to see Reus even though he was honestly making an effort this go around.

As Malva motioned with her head is hues followed the direction she had gestured in, his gaze falling on the leather bound book which was haphazardly sprawled on the floor not far from them. Just looking at it caused a shiver to run down his spine which was something that didn’t happen often, the book just…bothered him. “Mal….” His voice once more drifted off as he struggled between anger and concern since he knew how dangerous blood magic was for a Diviner and he was more so for Malva despite her unmatched skill. Was she spiraling again? If so there wasn’t much he could do other than try to pull her back again and there had been such conflict between them the last go around and he couldn’t handle that right now, not when he needed his siblings like he never had before.

“The ancient teaching of magic are tricky and dangerous Malva, you know that. Blood magic is something you said you would always stay away from.” The very practice of it had been something he liked, the very idea of it setting him on edge since most usually used it for darker purposes. “Why are you trying to re-acclimate yourself with the teachings of old?” He asked curiously as he ran his hands up and down the blanket which was covering her arms. “You’re scaring me Mal.” He stated honestly since she truly was.

It wasn't as if she never expected this to happen. It was only a matter of time when she first noticed the signs stepping up its game a while ago. What she did not expect however, was just how badly the impact travels. It was like it sunk the teeth on her and made sure both her legs and hands were tied up invisibly. There was currently no escape route for her. The only possible way there was for her to escape its dark clutches was to go through it and come back the hard way. When Aureus wrapped his arms around her to calm herself, she didn't protest. Malva only clamped her mouth shut and said nothing as she stared right ahead. It wasn't until she could feel the lips brushing against her head featherly that she allowed the tears to resume its pace. It kept flowing for reasons even she couldn't comprehend.

She gave up trying to understand why she did this or that. If only the translucent tears would not mix into the mess she made earlier. Her blood was everywhere and it was clear that she hasn't even tried to close her wound because both her palms seemed wounded. Her sapphire hues were fixated on her right palm when she came into contact with it as she tried to control her breathing. This was harder than she thought. It was as if she could hear her own voice ringing in her ears. “As an individual, we should be mindful of who we give our blood to. In the supernatural world, don't trust people as easily as you should.” It was mellow and soft, reminding herself very much of how fragile her voice actually sounded originally. The voice of the girl who's been through her own forced actions. Malva didn't know what to make of it. But she knew it was a warning, though it felt like it was mocking her state.

From the corner of her eyes, she could see Constance looming. Her teeth sheathed and growling lowly towards Reus. The Siberian cub was slowly growing and it wasn't only the physical growth making a mark, her ferocity increased. From the tone of his voice, she knew she's probably gonna get an hour long lecture this way and she's not even complaining at this point. It was her fault for meddling into the dark arts without precaution. Again. Aureus had every reason to chide her, especially when he knew exactly what happened to her 400 years ago that resulted her trauma when it comes to dark energy being used in magic in general. It was the very reason she strayed away from the path of utilizing them. She wasn't weak around them, it was the opposite. The temptations, the voices, everything. If anything, Mal felt a lot more stronger around it, every branch rooting slowly into her.

Perhaps that was why she closed away the door that leads to that option; because she's afraid. She shouldn't like it, but she did. One taste of it was all she needed to delve into them. What's worse was that she went as far as to learn the old ways, and not just dark arts in general. The ancient arts that their ancestors stopped practicing around late 15th century, for a reason. “I know.. I know I said that. But I thought I could try again. It's been a while, Reus.. I can't keep pushing it away because of one trauma.” Oh she knew it was more than just a trauma but if that's what she wanted to tell herself, so be it. “I was trying to get familiar with it. So I can understand it.” But the mess her room was in and herself included stated it didn't went well.

Aureus might be known for a lot of things which painted him in a negative light but when it came to his family no matter their feelings or conflicts he would always be there for them. He would pick them up they fell and trek through both heaven and hell should it make things better. Right now he had no idea what to do for Malva other than to be here for her since his abilities were not the sort which had general application in moments like this. Sure he could take her memories, hide them away but right now wasn’t about that. Right now he just needed to bring her back down and away from what had been happening to help her to remember herself in all of it.

Blood was one of the most personal things a person could give, after all it was unique to each person and could be use for all manner of magic. To use your own blood especially for a spell meant you were trying to add power to it or figure out something about yourself. What was Malva trying to find or even hide? It was a question only the woman before him could answer and yet he was reminded of the young girl she had once been when they met. “That is something we more than most need to be mindful of, you more than the rest of us as far as magic is concerned.” Truthfully the Aspect of Time was rather confused by everything which had transpired as his brain rushed to keep up now that he was awake. None of the Ailwards were known for being particularly clumsy or leaving their blood around nor were they the sort to willingly give it away and yet Malva seemed to serious about the words she had spoken.

The cub clearly was waiting for a moment when he no longer seemed to be offering assistance or decided to raise his voice. “Constance we both just want to help her, it’ll be alright. We may not always get alone, you and I or even she and I but I would never hurt her.” He said in a clam and even tone knowing exactly how things could go should Malva allow the darker side of magic to guide her. Every element had more than one side and with magic that was surely true. Playing within the middle ground was more a weakness for Malva than anything else but if darkness claimed her and magic as a whole there would no longer be balance. He couldn’t lose his sister like that, “Something is obviously bothering you to take such drastic measures Mal. I just….I wish you felt as if you could still talk to me.” But that seemed to have flown out the window thanks to their disagreements about the Celestials but so much had changed, especially with Reus having broken down and going to Ophelia. However that was something he’d like to keep to himself for the time being.

Reus’ expression hardened at her words, there was obviously something pushing her, a reason for it all but this wasn’t something he could just condone her delving into. “It’s wasn’t just a trauma Malva, you know that.” His expression was pained clearly remembering a time when he had watched his sister begin to slip way despite the fact that physically she was there with them. “Do you fear something so dark and old is looming that you’re willing to take that risk again? To risk your own sanity and potentially the lives of others? I know these are dark days Malva but…I can’t lose you, I won’t. Whatever is happened and whatever is causing this renewed desire to learn, we can over come this and figure it out some other way, we have to.” If she wanted reminder of the past he had not problem bringing those memories back into the forefront of her mind but he was sure they were never far from her thoughts, not while trying something like this.

Malva has always had a tendency to push everyone else away, it became colloquial that at some point, no one bothered to try and pry anymore, much to her relief. People have secrets, and she's not excluded from it. Her secrets will end up eating her someday, and whilst she knew that, she couldn't afford to think about the consequences that will follow afterwards. That is for the future, not the present. She should focus on the things firsthand before attempting to handle the others. Aureus was one of the least people she would come for right now, and it's not because she's not close to him because she is. Aureus was perhaps the closest brother she had, there were nights when she always came to him for help regarding her sleep and problems, but do not let that fool you, they had a lot arguments in general. She works closely with him and him with her, but there were plenty of differences personally that they couldn't push aside. She couldn't count just how many times they've scolded and chastised one another ever since they met each other.

She didn't expect him to come to her aid when she needed him truthfully, Malva was just calling out for him because that's the closest person that came to her mind earlier. And he came. Hearing her eldest brother's chiding, the Aspect of Magic lowered her gaze and looked down with a cloud of shame towering above her. Of course she knew that. Mal couldn't bring herself to speak anything because her airstream felt constricted all of sudden and she wasn't sure if she had any answer for the Aspect of Time on hand. Should she tell him the truth? Was there any point of hiding this away from the person who's helped her through this same exact problem centuries ago?

Magic in general is very volatile, she knows that better than most people, and yet here she is treading through them without any backup plans had anything occur. “I want to talk about it.. But it's hard. Reus, I don't feel like myself anymore. Each day passes and I can feel my control over magic slipping away bit by bit.” She sounded her main worry, careful not to mention too much of the specifics in fear of what he would think of her. The last thing Mal wanted was to pose herself in another light. “And I don't know why that's happening. At first, I thought I've been slacking. That I needed to come in terms and tune myself with the nature, to come back mending the solidarity ties between them, but it's not just that. Something's wrong, I know I'm not the only one who could feel it” she coughed, catching his hues with her own, the dried tears that was mixed with her own blood making its home on her cheeks and hands. The problem was that she had no idea where to start.

“It's been bothering me for a while now. It's growing and it's becoming more frequent.” It was clear that this was bothering her immensely to the point where she's slowly falling down in cracks. That trauma from 400 years ago still haunted her and she wasn't sure why she hasn't ask Reus to wipe it off her memories, perhaps the guilt would keep her awake either way. And it's better to acknowledge what you did wrong rather than to run around in circles searching for it. “But I can't just stay still and do nothing, Reus. It'll affect me, and it's only a matter of time before I act recklessly again” she whispered, her voice hoarse from all the screaming and crying earlier. “And what I just did? It proves how incompetent I've become. If I can't understand it and come to terms with it, then I'm of no use if there's a dark force coming. You know that as well as I do, don't deny it” she pressed, her tone harsh but vulnerable at the same time. They were people yes, but the sole reason why they exist until today was because of their responsibilities so to see them putting it before everything else, it wasn't foreign.

Clasping his hand with both her hands, her lips curved into a thin-lipped smile, the bitterness behind it looming ever so slightly. “You'll never lose me, you guys will always find a way to bring me back.” Supposedly they shouldn't have to, because bringing her back was no easy task and they have their own problems. But she needs to do this. She had to. Malva had to try. “The moment I am branded competent, how long do you think it'll take before they consider me broken and replace me?” she asked, knowing fully well that Reus would understand what she's asking, who they are. Their services are all to the gods, forever and always. Understandable too because they don't need someone so unstable to keep holding to such position. Imagine what she could do with her god-given abilities? Just the mere thought of it scares her to oblivion. “I don't want to go..” For once in her life, she actually wanted to stay a little while longer.

Aureus could honestly say he wasn’t anyone’s favorite in the Manor, most did their best to avoid him since he was usually incredibly serious and his facial expressions were rarely welcoming ones. That didn’t mean that he didn’t need human contact or conversations to say the least. The issue with the Celestials had caused most of his siblings to avoid him in order to stay away from a verbal altercation which usually came from the simple fact he had enough stress and guilt upon his shoulders and didn’t need anyone adding more. That didn’t mean that he cared any less about his siblings or the rest of the Ailwards, despite his brooding attitude he was loyal to a fault and would always be there for those who needed him regardless of if they might be in the middle of a fight or the happiest with one another that they had ever been. It didn’t matter, if they needed him then he would be there. So was the case with Malva this evening, she had called to him and thought they might not always be on the best of terms he would always come. At the moment he could see so much of the young girl she had once been, a sadness and a darkness and it caused his chest to ache because all he wanted to do then and now was help her.

Malva was connected to one on the lost volatile and dangerous of the elements that the Aspects held. Light, darkness, life, death and the elements themselves all flowed in one direction. Time followed in multiple directions but magic, magic was all around going in whatever direction it pleased. Of the Aspects he and Malva were the most temperamental and volatile because it was hard to find balance and control with something with was always shifting and following whatever way it wanted to. “Mal..” He took her hand in his and stared into her eyes with a soft smile, “Malva I’ve seen you in worse situations and honestly, I don’t want to see you go down that road again. Blood has nothing to do with who I consider family and you are my family Mal.” They had gotten through this before and he believed that they could again, though that was only possible if she opened up. They both knew that Diviners were being killed and their magic was going somewhere, though they couldn’t tell where exactly. As she spoke he nodded since it seemed as if most of the elements were out of balance though Malva and magic seemed the be the one struggling the most. “An imbalance and something wrong within out elements doesn’t mean we’ve been slacking. There’s…something, like a dark cloud hanging over the city and it feels like we’re all just holding out breath while waiting to see what it brings.” Which was not a good feeling to have.

“Malva you know you can always come to any of us, no matter how much we might bicker or disagree we have a duty to the world and to each other.” Which was why he would at times lock his staff away so he could clear his mind and find himself again and have the strength to continue on. Their elements could wear them down, more so when they were not as they should be. “We won’t let it get to that Malva, we can’t and I can’t see you like that again.” It was hard and it had come close to a decision on how to continue and if Malva would even be able to. “If Argent and Cora have taught us nothing else it’s that you can’t fight light with light or darkness with more darkness. Each have their place and each are necessary but giving into a darker force to defeat a darker force will push us closer to losing you. There’s always another Malva and if this one is obviously not working than perhaps you’re going down the wrong path.” Releasing a sigh as she said she would be of no use he once more wrapped his arms around her, “Sometimes being of use happens in ways we don’t realize. The Guards have no elements and some have no magical nor abilities, they’re just humans who believe in a cause and are they useless to us? Of course not Malva, everything and everyone has a purpose even if we can’t see it.”

A wave of anger seemed to crash upon the shores of his mind at her words, “Malva we will never let that happen. We have always fought for you and we will continue to do so. We may have been chosen by a high power but I believe that they knew what they were doing and they gave the strongest what they believe they could withstand, not what we ourselves believe we can withstand. You’ve always been stronger than you realize but you focus on the wrong things. Even internal battles aren’t won by focusing on what we can’t do but on focusing on what we can and relying on those who will always have your back.” He hated when Malva began to slip because she began to loss focus and only thoughts of the bad and what could happen and Aureus couldn’t promise her other wise. The futures involving most of the Aspects was clouded to him because he had direction connection but he did believe they were chosen for a reason which meant they were given something they could handle. Pulling back he lifted her chin forcing her to look at him, “You aren’t going anywhere Malva, do you understand? Not until it is you day decide that you’re done. So keep fighting and keep pushing because if you truly believe that you can’t handle this then the gods will believe it too. Don’t give me an enemy I cannot fight Malva.” The loss of one of his siblings would shatter his world after them all being together for so long. He would never be able to think of the gods the same way again if they took Malva from them and replaced her with someone they deemed unbroken.

Was her faith over her family so little? No. Of course, not. Malva thinks the world of her family and she knew they knew that too, even if she doesn’t showcase it every so often these days, they’ll know it in their hearts that the Aspect of Magic does put them in high regard in her heart. These days, everyday sounds painful enough for Malva to get through, it was slowly beginning to feel like a chore, somewhat.  The only thing reminding her to keep fighting is her family and her responsibilities because she doesn’t get to put down her mantle so easily after a long day and leave them. It doesn’t work that way, but even if she doesn’t want to do that, it’s likely that she might get stripped away if she doesn’t measure up to her God-given abilities very soon. That scares her to oblivion, and she wondered if that thought ever crossed her siblings’ head, perhaps, Aureus?

Whenever she felt going through this emotional dilemma mess, Malva remembered who she was; she’s just a girl, who was no more than stepping into her early adulthood and less than even the 20s when she was executed, and still her vessel was the same that day, only her mind evolved. But there was only so far to the extent of her mind could go and despite it being one of the most powerful weapons she had they tried to rank it, it’s very vulnerable and still prone to attacks, namely emotional ones. They had argued so many times, her and Reus, but at the end of the day, he would be the sibling she would scurry to whenever she was in doubts with herself or had trouble trying to keep up. It’s always been that way ever since the beginning. So it was no surprise to find him being the one to console the Aspect of Magic in her room when she’s at her weakest.

Reassuring words always helped, but there was only so much they can do to her, feeling it is not the same in hearing, that is the case for her. She likes hearing consolation and words of reassurance but would that make her feel better beyond her heartache? No. “Believe me, brother. I have no want in going down that road again, but what can I actually do to prevent something that’s already considered inevitable?” she quipped softly, her tone remaining solemn and timid, feeling as if she’s cowering from the weight of the entire world. For the past few months, and coming back in a larger number than she’s ever seen, diviners were getting killed left and right, and when she tried to send people to investigate the roots of it, they came back blank.

Like the diviners never existed in the first place, and while it’s easier to fool others who’s never knew them to exist, it’s different with Malva, who could feel their magic, their energy, and then one day, it dimmed slowly before eventually, going out of power, much like the electric generator. There were strong energy level readings across the world, but due to a few circumstances, Mal wasn’t able to venture there herself personally, but no matter how many guards she sent with her portals, neither one of them came back with a report that satisfied her. There’s no way no magic could be read there, Malva could sense it all the way from Evermore, yet no one else could, which really aggravated her to a point where she’s more prone to lashing out. “So you felt it too…” she trailed off weakly, averting her gaze away from the carpeted floor and to meet her eldest brother’s own bright hues that always seemed to tell a story about the Aspect of Time.

“Are we really supposed to let them pass just like that, then? I’ve been so bothered by too little from one part and too much from the other,” Reus knew what she was talking about, Mal was talking about the magic radiating off the globe, it wasn’t supposed to be a tipping off scale from either side since that’s what she’s here for, to ensure balance is kept and achieved. Yet she could not do a thing about it because she wasn’t even sure where they originated from. With the current fluctuation of hospital cases, it wasn’t helping her paranoia. “I want to come to you guys, but really, if all you’re going to see is this shell of a broken person whining and wailing, is there really a motive behind the visit? We have so much more pressing matters to attend to, Reus.” Of course, she would say that it sounds just like Malva to deny others’ help and try to solve it on her own, and maybe it works when it’s on her own elements, but this time, no. This time, it’s more than just her element.

“The best way to fight fire is with the fire itself, you know that. I can’t even get in touch with my light without struggling anymore, and that’s saying something, you know I don’t play with dark magic. Yet I can perform them so much better than my ‘supposed’ forte. Doesn’t that tell me something? Perhaps the only reason why I’ve been terrible at controlling the other end is that I didn’t embrace it and instead, chose to push it away, denying the other half when I sure as hell know I’m not supposed to be in the vicinity of light only.” There was some sense to what she’s saying, but Malva was way too unstable to be trying anything right now. A situation where she’s better off with no magic than leaning towards the other. “My purpose is to fix things, but I can’t even fix myself, how am I supposed to account for other beings associated with magic now?!” she snapped and took a while to relieve that off her, casting a rather apologetic look towards her brother. That wasn’t supposed to happen. No wonder it’s unhealthy to keep things pent up.

As he lifted her chin to meet her eyes, her glossy icy blue hues meet his own, and Malva clenched her jaw slightly. “Then what would you say if I say I’m done now?” She’s testing the waters, but she’s always playing with dangerous waters. Here she was, slowly questioning her own siblings. It occurred to her, that she’s been holding to the gods for so long, pleading and asking them for direction every night, but her pleas went unheard. “What about me then? Who’s my enemy? Is it myself? Because I can’t see it any other way now.”

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