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If someone would have told her two years ago that locating her family, and eventually opening up to them emotionally would end the way it had done; she would have, without hesitation refused to go on such a mission. Not in a million years would Clarissa decide to do something which would only result in her feeling completely and utterly broken on the inside yet have to pretend that she was indeed fine, and handling anything and everything that was thrown at her; however, that was her own pride talking - she knew that with what had happened, people would have preferred her to cry in front of them, to speak of her emotional turmoil and the like. Yet, no matter how much she sometimes wished to take them up on their offer, even with people like Siobhan, she simply couldn’t do it; she believed she resorted back to her days of training at The Organisation, where emotion was a weakness. ‘Emotions get you killed, control yourself’ Ironic, she thought as she recalled the last words she said to her twin brother before he got himself killed. Thus, to not wind up like him, it was easier to pretend that nothing of the sort happened and perhaps that she never even met him - yet that would never be possible living in such a city; people would constantly remind her of the siblings she lost.
Therefore, it was no surprise at any rate that Clarissa for the most part kept herself locked away at home; she only ventured out when the need arose - otherwise almost everything could be delivered to her house. She found the only time she left was to check in on Jonathan who, as expected was dealing with their deaths in a completely different manner than she; and in fact, she was worried about him - out of two, it should be her going reckless and wild, and returning to her darkened path, not him. But there was not much she could do but support him, even if she disagreed with some of his methods, after all she was not one to talk as she had done far worse in her time; such as right now, she sat and watched the Nephilim faction run into chaos as they began to grow suspicious of the whereabouts of their ambassador. ‘That would be a task for another day’ She thought each time she bypassed one of her fellow Angel-Children in the street; however, how she avoided the question each time truly stunned her.
Oh she was not dealing with this healthily.
Clarissa, unfortunately had to speak with the many legal services as well as the funeral directors and it was within these meetings that she suddenly recalled - Jem. She knew he was big enough and ugly enough to look after himself, seeing as he was almost - if not, already 18 years of age. Yet, it dawned on her that he still didn’t know and without a doubt he would have heard the many rumours which were drifting across town, plus she supposed she did need to go to Cornelia’s houses to gather some information about the services which where helping her; let alone the police force which Corn worked for. Rissa cussed under her breath, and decided to pull her big girl pants upward and made her way towards her sisters apartment where she was bound to find the young Dhampir - likely playing some form of video game, in darkness, with take away boxes littered across the place.
The Nephilim took the back roads to the apartment, with what she had to do, she was not wanting to bump into another Nephilim who would bombard her with a million questions. Once she arrived at her sisters place, Clarissa stood outside for a good few moments, composing herself as much as she could before grabbing her spare key from her back pocket and letting herself in. “Pet? Are you home?” She called, using the nickname she had for him from the moment that Cornelia expressed she was adopting a teenage boy.
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Jem was different from other people his age. Something he accepted a long time ago. Even as a child, he knew he didn’t fit in, believing in and being influenced by his aunt and Uncle. Being the kid that no one else wanted to play with at the playground. One that the parents would whisper and usher others for him to stay away. Jem didn’t mind. Prefering to keep to himself. More used to being the loner type of person. Finding he had more friends with people who were adults, fitting in with people who understood him a lot better. Jem had always gotten along with Clarissa who at first was a bit nervous around him at first. Since he knew she was never around kids but it didn’t take long for her to push past it when he was opposite what she expected. Soon as he mentioned wanting to hear the stories and things that she tries to keep from him for his innocent ears but he wanted to hear more about it. Sometimes he would manage to pry something from Cornelia wanting to hear about her investigations and cases
The Dhampir had a weird imagination at times, and would be the one to say something others are too worried to say but think about. “I could never do that” Jem knew whatever she could tell him could never change things between them, they were somewhat family. He’d been adopted into the crazy Bradford family. Not one to sway away. It never mattered to him living under the room of Assassins, it was even somewhat more reliving. Having more protection. Speaking of which, Jem stayed quiet as Rissa was calling him out from ditching his Dhampir studies. Having not even started it at fact. “I know how to look after myself to an extent” He started to say but knew it was like fighting a losing battle. “I just haven’t gotten around to it” Jem knew it was bad of him but he was trying to keep the last thing that reminded him that he was once human. Still it all felt strange to him, finding out about supernatural creatures being real and no longer bedtime stories. Jem knew that she was right and he needed to learn to fight. “Are you sure you want to train someone with zero skills or training?” Chuckling softly, shooting her a teasing grin knowing that she’d be soon regreeting offering her help. Jem didn’t know if he’d be a natural or not, he wasn’t that bad at gym at school.
Pizza was everyone’s weakness using it a few times before to get on Rissa’s goodside, like now. “Pizza works every time” Pointing out the truth. He could eat pizza any time. Hot, cold, for lunch, dinner or even leftovers for breakfast too, sure that she was the same. The fake ID thing didn’t phase Rissa, he knew that it wouldn’t but he hadn’t dared to show it to Cornelia knowing that she’d throw him into a jail cell. Something she’d always threaten him if she’d catch him drinking alcohol. Whilst with Rissa it was all different, she was more rebellious like him. “I only use it from time to time, just parties and a few bars” Shrugging his shoulders a little, letting him know he wasn’t someone to use it to buy bottles of booze to him from others. He could blame it on the drinking age being 21 whilst in other countries it’s 18, almost like the government wants young people to rebel.
The conversation soon turned into something more serious. Jem wanted to hear the real reason why she’s been keeping away. Able to sense that Russia was acting strange soon as he stepped inside the door and necked him to sit down with her. That she’d been putting it off for long as she could. Jem knew a few things about the Bradfords family secrets but not much. Having stayed away from wanting to know or hear about his father's killer. Soon as he learnt and heard the real truth, Jem froze with shock. Feeling breathless, like he’d been punched in a gut, trying to process his worst fears coming back to him. Jem started to panic. More people in his life kept dying around him. The Dhampir stood up quickly from his chair, stumbling almost. Still in shock. “Fuck” He cursed, running his fingers through his curls. “I’ll go, I’ll leave” He started to say, still not thinking clearly. His voice was breaking a little, tears falling down his face. “You don’t need to be landed with me, out of pity” Once again he was all alone, Jem knew the real reason last year that Cornelia only took him in out of pity from the guilt of the truth behind his father's death. Jem didn’t want to for the same to happen now. “I can grab my things and go, if that's what you want?” Giving her the easy option. Jem didn’t know if she still wanted him around, he was an adult now. Not needing a legal guardian or anything. True if he left he didn’t have anywhere to go but it wasn’t the first time he’d be living on the streets with no family left.
It had always baffled her that Jem didn't jump at the chance to learn about his supernatural heritage; to learn how to conjure up runes and feel the chosen weapon vibrate within his hand as if they were becoming one. Sure, she understood the shook that came with the very late realisation of being more than human; she too was well into her teenage years by the time she received full confirmation of her Angelic routes - despite the countless of accidents which happened when she was a child. Clarissa at that mere age was dumbfounded, confused and as lost as ever but the moment her foster family pushed her into the deep end, she couldn't get enough of her new found species. "It's a shock, yes. But the longer you put it off, the more you'll remain. Hell, you can choose to be immortal too, never age and see the world" Rissa prompted.
The Nephilim shook her head as her lips formed a closed mouthed smile at his comment. "I have trained far worse than you, Pet. Believe me" It was true, how some of the cadets got into the League was beyond her; some couldn't even tie their own shoelaces without losing their balance and stumbling over. "Besides, being a Dhampir, you'll have some natural ability to fight, meaning you'll pick up the moves a lot quicker than someone like myself who was not brought up in an Angelic community" Rissa reassured him, she knew deep down that it was fear, anxiety, the unknown which prevented him from wishing to progress with his newfound life. "Just be careful, if you get caught we may not always be able to pull some strings to get you out of prison" Which meant - We no longer have Cornelia to save our asses within the force.
Clarissa exhaled and pinched the bridge of her nose as Jem suddenly exploded from his chair; the feet of the chair making a rather ugly sound against the wooden floorboards. She tried to take a few deep breaths to control herself and to not say or do anything which could make the situation worse; this was certainly a situation when she needed someone who was a bit more tactile, who knew how to handle emotional outbursts. Rissa cussed under her breath and allowed him to spit words of anger and desperation her way; without him knowing, it pained her to hear him say he would leave. "Why would I want you to leave, James?" For the first time, in perhaps forever she used his real name; she stood up, her brows furrowing to gain balance due to the alcohol intake. Quite frankly, she didn't like the tone he was spitting at her and she growled through gritted teeth. "You're putting words into my mouth and if you haven't noticed, you're family whether you like it or not" Tough love, right? "Sure, if you want to leave, the doors open" She nodded towards the front door. "But both of us know we're better if we stick together, and with the world going to shit out there, I couldn't live with myself if you got yourself into trouble"
Rissa exhaled and grabbed the family portrait Cornelia made them have last Christmas. "We're dysfunctional, fucked up but once you're in a Bradford's heart, there is no leaving, not really" Which was true, she had left someone she loved once, and he had stayed there; took permanent residency. "So go, or not. I'll be that fucking annoying shadow which you can't shake"
Jem could feel that his head was spinning, his mind was all over the place. Then his heart was racing too. Still trying to process all he was being told. Taking in the fact that he’s lost more people who he cared for. With the list of people who he cared for was now dead and was longer than those where were alive. Jem couldn’t feel that he was cursed. Doomed. Feeling the people all around him just keep dying. Jem’s never been good at handling grief that it gets worse each time, bleiving he was the cause. His birth mother died during childbirth after complications that happened when he was born. Believing he killed his mother. Still it was something he’s never got over but he’s never admitted outloud to anyone. He’s always just kept it to himself. It was no secret that he’s never bothered to look into being a Dhampir. It was a part of him that he’s never accepted still trying to hang onto being a normal human for long as he could. Yet in reality he was far from it. “Are you immortal?” He wondered curiously it was something he’s never thought about or had asked before.
“I twisted my ankle once when getting the mail. Sprained my arm when making my bed. Or the time when I tripped over confetti” Jem started to list how he was quite accident prone. Warning her for what she was in for. “I don’t know we’ll have to see” He didn’t have much faith inself, he had a habit of putting himself down. “Okay, okay I’ll be careful” He promised nodding his head knowing now he didn’t have a get out of jail card like he had before. Jem wondered to himself what they were going to do. How they were going to explain Cornelia’s death to other people, to her work. Or if they’d just pretend to be her that she had to take a leave of absence. Knowing they couldn’t tell the truth, Jem knew that at least.
Jem started to panic a little, still his mind was all over the place. Not thinking straight. Finding he was starting to say the wrong thing, he was just panicking a little. Whilst doing so he was hurting Clarissa’s feelings without knowing it at first. Soon as he heard his proper name being used he knew he had done wrong when he spoke of leaving. Now seeing how he should be saying the opposite as he comes to relise that they were really the only family each other had. “I’m sorry for what I said. I was just worried, scared that you didn’t want me. I didn’t want to feel like a burdun.” He apologised softly looking ashamed of himself for the way he had acted out and had spoken to her like that. Jem raised his brows curiously and watched as Clarissa pulled out the family portraits that Cornelia insisted for them to do. It was the only picture they had and will have of them all together. It took him a long time to relaise that he belonged and was part of a family till now. Legally he was Bradford with how Cornelia had officially adopted him not long ago. “You're the only family, the only person I have left… We’re stuck with each other for now on”
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