She knew it was wrong. How many times had she told herself that it was utterly and inexplicably wrong? More times than she could count to. Yet there she was, the now slightly flaxen haired Aspect of Magic was standing her ground on venturing off to the city of Argolis. Malva had placed all hands on deck upon deciding that she shall go off to Greece to search for any other possible answers she could be provided with, regarding the fall and destruction of their home, Isle of Skye. How could the Russian born woman forget about it? How could any one of them forget what happened? There was no way she could push it aside without investigating about it. Only, she knew she had to push the matter aside for a while as she got down and resolved other problems on her plate.

It has been at least an hour since she had let her eyes linger on the the red ruby pendant that laid prettily on the table not far off from where she stood. Malva leant against the wall of her room and crossed her arms in contempt. She wasn’t sure what to do with the petty little trinket that she has had in her possession for almost four centuries now. For such a small thing, it held a certain aura to it and it wasn’t at all near pleasantries. It held all the dark energy she harnessed for some particular missions back in the days. Sometimes, in order to best the darkness, was to overtake it using the lesser known method. One it doesn’t expect you to go for. Life did have a tendency at wanting the most twisted for everything.

Shaking her head at her own herself, she grabbed the pendant and tossed it into the drawer before closing it furiously and sat on her bed, her sapphire hues never leaving the mahogany wooden table. It didn't last as long as she thought it would though, seeing as Malva went back to grab it and pushed it inside her purse. It wasn’t as if she could avert her attention so easily without any reason to do so despite giving herself one very solid one. Which was to forget about the past and move ahead in her life. But it’s always easier said than done, per usual. The pendant might look fancy and pretty, but it was gleaming in a very malevolent light. And if there was anything Mal knew from centuries of dwelling around magic, it’s that she doesn’t go well surrounding herself with so much dark energy as it tempts her. But she needed it for this journey.

But after what Octavia told her that day, she couldn't forget about it. This is something she needed to do, she convinced herself to do it. Her touch with magic in general had been cut off, albeit not fully, but it doesn't feel like how it was supposed to feel and if Malva couldn't cope or adapt to those changes, then what's the point? Especially with the chaos incited as of late, things were hectic and it was slowly overwhelming the purple dragon to the brink of insanity. Mal had rummaged through her closet yesterday to find one particular book she kept locked away until she realized she didn't bring it with her. Keeping it in the manor should have been the safest choice but not to Malva, that book was way too important to just be laying around so she had kept it somewhere else in 1698. 

Mal didn't pack much, she literally only put enough clothes to last for a few weeks because the Citadel had their own clothes to be worn and they can venture to Athens if they want. Her hair was a lighter shade of brown and it was slightly longer, the Aspect of Magic stared at her reflection in the mirror before making her way downstairs with her luggage, to wait for Octavia at the living room. This trip wouldn't be anywhere near a luxurious vacation to Greece, yeah people know they'll stay at a hotel in Athens but Mal was going on a pilgrimage to Mycenae Citadel located in Argolis which would take all the attention away. She perched one arm on the couch and allowed her white persian ragdoll cat, Seraphire, nestle in her lap. 

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He nodded slightly, they’d always worked best together when it came to that kind of thing, they could bounce ideas off one another and take it in turns to practice out the spells, tweaking the incantations and the power sources bit by bit until the desired result was found “Some of my favorite memories revolve around figuring out how to do the impossible together” it was challenging, she always challenged him to work harder and be stronger, he wouldn’t be the diviner he was today if not for her pushing.

He knew how hard this was for her, she’d always struggled with balancing her own identity and the aspect of magic, sometimes they felt like the same person and sometimes they felt so far apart that it was hard to believe that sometimes quite vulnerable girl had so much weight on her shoulders, not that many got to see that side of her, she was good at covering it up. “That’s what happens when you keep trying to drag the entire of the magical realm behind you” she was tired out and how could it be any other way when she always felt responsible for every little thing that happened, even when it was nothing to do with her.

He laughed when she finished her sentence with ‘assuming you’re bad’ before shrugging “I guess the selfish part of me definitely notices what I want in other people and how I could get it from them” it was morality that determined whether you chased down said thing or did the right thing and let it pass by. “Still it isn’t a defense to betray someone who trusted you” there wasn’t really an excuse for that, especially when said person rarely handed their trust over to anyone for fear of that exact same thing happening.

He froze for a moment when the setting changed, spotting the snow as it fell outside the windows and pursed his lips because it felt familiar to him. Seeing the way she panicked he sucked in a deep breath and held it, was he in this memory? The one which ranked…first. He softened his eyes for a moment “You have to…all of this will have been for nothing if you can’t make it through the last one…” and selfishly, he needed to know if this was really the memory he thought it was.

If it wasn't for the fact that something terrible happened between them both centuries ago, she would've told him she missed him. She missed his company, his witty remarks and his attractive and otherwise insufferable attitude. Sebastian worked best with her and she him. They were both smart and ambitious, which made them a powerful combination. Sometimes the Aspect of Magic wondered if their interests clashed with each other because if it didn't, they would've controlled everything. Once upon a time, they would be considered an unstoppable duo. "There is truly no impossible when you put your mind to it… you were already someone born with an affinity to magic, it flows through you… magic is your nature. You just needed an outlet… to channel all of those possibilities to make it something possible." 

She had a slight scowl when he pointed out that she was dragging the entire magical world behind her because somehow she felt offended by that jab, no matter how much truth lies within it. "I can't give it up now, it's not as if I haven't thought about it, you know. But the responsibility is mine until it isn't. Right now, it's not the best time to give up the mantle." Both of them also knew if she gave it up, there would be no reason to keep her here. She would return to what she once was; dead. And somehow, it felt calming to Malva, who longed to rest. "Don't you worry about that, once everything is done, I'll rest and you won't need to be bothered by the likes of me." The new Aspect would be a lot friendlier than her. Everyone is. 

"Trust is so easily bought and given, you give them that and they will take it for granted." Maybe that's why betrayals occur very often. Even to people who didn't deserve it. She clenched her jaw and closed her eyes momentarily before going into the last memory, everything looked way too familiar, almost as if it was yesterday. There, they could see behind the curtains, the still versions of them talking and debating about keeping or sharing the new knowledge they discovered upon their pilgrimage to the same citadel. "There are things that shouldn't be shared, Sebastian, you know that too, deep down you do. Do not fight me on this, you know it's final."

It was strange, being back by her side again, it felt as though no time had passed at all but also like an eternity had dragged on too, everything was different now and he could feel the space between them but the same as he always did, he also felt a sense of closeness to her which he couldn’t deny, the same connection he always found with her. “Magic has always been the thing we know best in the world, even if we could never quite align on our thoughts of it’s use” he murmured softly, he respected why she was so strict and he had even seen the result of burns because of using magic recklessly, but he still believed in freedom of expression for diviners.

He pressed his lips together, selfishly he didn’t want to give up, not now or ever, it was hard for him to imagine or even try to picture what the world would look like without her as the aspect of magic, he didn’t even want to entertain the idea or speculate it. “None of your kind have ever…resigned” he commented in a soft voice, they had no idea what the outcome would be in the end, that was the truth of it. “Real trust is rare to find, most people act as though trust is easy to hand out but it isn’t, everyone has those little doubts in their chest” he did around most people because he knew what greed and selfishness could do.

As the memory faded in, there was no doubt about the settling, though he had to admit it was strange to experience it this way, like watching through a frosted screen while also flashing himself back to the very moment he stood there. He pressed his lips together as he watched it unfold, seeing the way his younger self was getting heated with her when she forbade him to continue with the spell, in hindsight, he could see how influenced he seemed while standing on the outside. “I should have known what would happen” he grumbled under his breath as he turned away, almost ashamed to see the two of them fighting.

His presence made her wonder if they didn't fight, if that incident didn't occur centuries ago, would they have been in a better place now? They were a nice match, of course when they minus the whole arguing, but Malva argues with literally everyone. It's almost as if it's her favorite pastime. But Sebastian understood her in more ways than one. They clash on plenty of topics, but she missed him dearly and a part of her knew he does too. How else could they look at each other like this and still remain emotionless? Their bond wasn't one that's easily destroyed or broken after all. 

"None of my kind has ever resigned, that is true… we were the first and up until now nobody has ever stopped and took off their mantle. We were friends once, our bond so deep and trusting we became siblings. We don't share a single drop of blood between us but I wouldn't give them up for anything…" Perhaps that was why they're still here today despite everything. "But history is meant to be made someday Sebastian… It's been a millennium… we're tired…. I'm tired and I wish to rest." In another life, maybe Mal could see herself even starting a family if she was given the chance. She was robbed of a normal life, after all. Once upon a time ago, she wanted that too. 

She didn't want to see this memory, everything she feared about this very particular memory being her first made her feel the goosebumps around her. It felt too real. "I should've stopped you more… but I didn't… I should've known you wouldn't stop easily, we are both stubborn" She was the Aspect of Magic, she had her duty and conduct, she should not have allowed that to happen. She washed as their younger selves fought more "Sebastian stop! I don't want to fight you on this. Rules are meant to be followed, not everything must be broken by your rebellious nature! You have no idea what this could mean so please just give up on this and agree with me once."

His presence made her wonder if they didn't fight, if that incident didn't occur centuries ago, would they have been in a better place now? They were a nice match, of course when they minus the whole arguing, but Malva argues with literally everyone. It's almost as if it's her favorite pastime. But Sebastian understood her in more ways than one. They clash on plenty of topics, but she missed him dearly and a part of her knew he does too. How else could they look at each other like this and still remain emotionless? Their bond wasn't one that's easily destroyed or broken after all.

He definitely wouldn’t have been able to shoulder it, not even with the support she had in the form of her siblings and the guard. “But we both know you’re not going to be able to quit, not until you’re sure there’s someone who could hold up the weight you’re being crushed by” a replacement was needed right? But then he also knew that Mal wouldn’t wish the job she did on anyone else, so he wondered if she would ever really be able to give in to those wants to have a normal life. It must be difficult to be in such a situation that held so much power but so much responsibility.

Their history had it’s good and bad moments…but this was by far the worst, she was trying to protect him but he didn’t see that then, all he had seen was her fear to discover the truth. He knew now that the dark power in the citadel had managed to seep into his consciousness and take a hold of him, he probably wouldn’t have been able to stop then even if he wanted to. He was ashamed of his own lack of self-control honestly. “Everything changed that day” he commented and pressed his lips together as the arguing continued.

There was a deluded tone to his words that said there was no turning back no matter what her past self kept saying “If the rules mattered then we wouldn’t have come all this way, we wouldn’t haven’t fought like hell for entry…this spell called for us Mal, we have to follow through” and at that very moment the wall of magic barricaded itself around his figure, chants rolling off his tongue as he endlessly repeated the same words, his body dropping to his knees from the power and pain that overcame him. Between the chants he managed to call out to her “Get everyone out of here…”

She always regretted what went down with them centuries ago. There wasn't a moment where she has actually forgotten what happened and how much it left the Aspect of Magic devastated with her loss. Losing him. Both figuratively and literally. She shook her head and murmured "When you laid there… not moving, I swear I was ready to go crazy and yet I don't think you understood the toll that took on me…" Malva believed that while he understands her and knows her the best, there are still parts of her that he still failed to grasp, which frustrates her to no end. 

"I… who have nothing lasting, nothing I actually owned… losing someone who was by my side all this while, you can see why I was fucking angry, Sebastian." And yes, she was upset. Very much so. When he told her that she wasn't going to quit being Aspect of Magic, she couldn't help but to chuckle bitterly "Unfortunately, I have to agree with you on that…" She couldn't quit. Her conscience wouldn't let her and despite what others may think of her, Malva cares about the world. She didn't want to see all of her and her siblings' hard work to go down the drain. How could she? After all they've done? 

"Doesn't mean I don't want to quit though… like I said, it's exhausting… I can't keep going like this, I don't want to go crazy, I want to go on my own terms this time… nobody can take that away from me. Nobody." The brunette still resented the way she passed on and she had made sure nobody could control that aspect of her life anymore. She's powerful enough to make sure of it now. She had to stop herself from muttering no shit sherlock towards the diviner when he said everything changed that day. She could still remember every bit of detail on that day and it stung. Too much. 

"No, Sebastian you can't… please please just listen to me, you promised you wouldn't wouldn't against me again, you promised…" Her tone was broken the more she pleaded with him. There was no more of that adamant woman, what was left was just a desperate one who just wanted her lover to stop. "Maybe some things are just better left untouched…" She stepped back in horror when he fell down to the ground screaming, she refused to leave even when he told her to and it took her several attempts to run off so she could warn the rest to empty the citadel. She won't have their blood on her hands. She had thought she would be able to come back to save him in time. 

But fate willed it otherwise.

He looked down to the floor for a moment “I was foolish to not realize the very dangers I was putting myself in…but I was fixated on the power…” he was younger and much more naive back then, he saw power and it managed to take a grip on him he wasn’t able to shake. Learning the hard way had given him a whole new perspective of the limits he could take with magic. “I never intended to hurt you though…I hope you know that” she always tried to tell him what was best but it was impossible for him to take feedback on without knowing for himself. Even if it meant going through pain.

He knew her well by now, enough to know how deeply her sense of responsibility ran, despite how childish Mal could seem at times, she shouldered a lot that he was sure most never got to see, because she was that attuned to holding the weight. “I can’t blame you for being tired, magic never sleeps and I imagine you barely do either” that was what he recalled from their time together, always late nights and always worrying.

This memory was painful for both of them and seeing it from her perspective made his heart clench in his chest, he could sense how desparate she was feeling in that moment as she screamed out for him. She didn’t want to leave him. Eventually though, she gave in and did what she could to ensure people made it out safely. His body was laying lifeless in the scorched remains of the citadel by the time she returned. He was sure in that moment she thought she had lost him.

He had awoken. But he had changed after that. Everything had changed.

He closed his eyes as the memory faded out, Mal having now fought through her 5 worst memories had come out on the other side. Her shadowy self stepped aside, but not before warning her that reclaiming her powers would only return her to the misery she so badly wanted to run away from. “The choice is yours” he commented as he eyed the aspect of magic, wondering what she would choose.

She shook her head because although he was apologising for what he has done, Malva still found it hard to forgive him for breaking her heart. Everything else, she forgave him. But for threatening her heart? God knows she could never get over that. "That's right… you were foolish" She muttered. Of course she would take the chance to say something like that to him while the diviner was beating himself up. She would never miss an opportunity to make it like that. She sighed heavily, it was evident that the Aspect of Magic was plagued with sleepless nights and exhaustion looming everywhere she goes. 

"I can't give up… but it's not easy to go by everyday and pretend I'm fine because I'm not." She hated having to show she's not weak when in reality, it has be eating her up bit by bit to the point she has no idea how she'll function in the future. After all, magic is all she knows. The brunette was glad the memory faded away soon after because she couldn't stand there watching herself crying and sobbing over his lifeless body. It was painful enough to imagine that happening, much less to watch it happen right in front of her eyes again. Especially when that very man is standing right before her now. 

She bit her lip and gave the answer both of them knew she would. Malva would never turn her back just to run away from her problems. Reclaiming her powers meant she could at least hold things on the palm of her hands again. She could feel a chest pain on her, her hand clutching her chest as she stumbled on the ground trying to get ahold of herself. Suddenly everything looked normal, they were back in the citadel. "I hate that I still want to kiss that stupid face of yours… instead of strangling the living life out of you… I hate that I still care for this stupid man that you are…" She grumbled and scowled at him.

He could see a hint of sadness in her eyes when she spoke like that and it made his heart clench in his chest, back then he could have fooled himself into believing he was simply someone she tolerated, he never even considered for a moment what harm to him might have meant to her. His throat felt dry and he was wordless for a moment. It was painful to hear the sounds of her sobs as she begged him to wake up. He’d never seen this part before.

He was doing his best to choke down the emotions he was feeling because he didn’t feel like he had the right to cry in this situation, he was the one who did this to her and this ranked number one…this was the worst thing she believed she had ever been through. His death. At least in that moment, that’s what she had come to the conclusion had happened. He lowered his head almost ashamed because what was he supposed to say…he fucked up back then, he fucked up so badly that he could understand if she never forgave him.

When she reached to cluch her chest he lunged forward to hold her, as though he could somehow lessen any pain she might be feeling. A few moments later the veil of magic faded from around them and there they were, in the same empty room they had began. Though they both looked much more ragged. He was still pretty close to her so when she spoke again he lifted his gaze, staring at her as his lips parted “You still…” he stared at her in surprise, despite the fact she was glaring he found himself gravitating closer and closer, his eyes flicking down to her lips.

He would have made it all the way if it wasn’t for the sound of another voice ringing out and startling him, the blonde he had met earlier. “I see you two had quite the adventure without me” she spoke in a harsh, scolding tone. He bit his lip and moved back from the aspect slowly, eyeing her as he noticed the flash of purple appear in her eyes “Your powers…they’re surging back”.

Sebastian was the part of her life she wished would not resurface or come back. Ever. It wasn't because she was still bitter with everything, it has more to do with something that gives her an itchy feeling. The other male was a part of her life that she wished she could just close her eyes and forget but it was definitely easier said than done. Malva has had a long history on Earth and she had spent a good portion of them with Sebastian Daystar. The annoying man kept making her smile at the end of the day. Here he is today, still standing before her looking just like yesterday, attracting her. Everything about him makes her hate him so much yet the Aspect of Magic couldn't help but gravitate towards him.

She wanted to say she never forgave him but god knows she did. She has forgiven him so long ago it was crazy to think she was ever mad at him in the first place. When they were back in the room where they once were, the brunette blinked a few times to grasp the situation around them and bit her lip as she stared at her trembling hands. Did it work? "Yes I still do, I hate that I do, but I still do" she scowled, stumbling on her steps a bit as he moved closer. She didn't know what she was so afraid of. Him? Not exactly. What he meant to her? Perhaps.

The sound of Octavia's clear voice startled her as she averted her gaze away from the male and onto the blonde standing across the room with her hands on her hips, well this is surely going to warrant a scolding from nephilim for sure. She bit her lip and tried to think of reasons, well... excuses. "I couldn't help myself sorry-" However, before she had the chance to continue with her sentence, she whipped her head harshly towards his direction when he pointed out that her powers are surging back.

Mal frowned in confusion before bringing her hand up, trying to test if it was true or if he was playing with her. "You're not playing me right..." she muttered and made a slight movement, causing a force of energy to form around her, a purple misty light emerged and she swore she could actually cry tears of happiness right there. "It's... back..." Nothing compared to her full extent but this was a start. Perhaps in time, with enough rest and practice back to where she was previously, it would improve. 

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