Initia

Just a Phase (Open to Ivy and Taealha)

It had been a full month that passed since that night.  And thinking about it still brought this pain to her chest which she had never experienced before, heartbreak. The hardest part of it all was knowing the two of them still cared about one another like crazy but there was this massive wall between them which Ivy didn't know how to overcome. It had affected everything in her life, from people asking her if she had lost weight, to questioning if she was sick. Ivy was usually so good at hiding her emotions from others and putting a front but this, this had truly broken her and she had no one to blame but herself.

Her most recent movie had wrapped 2 weeks ago which meant she had free time since she came back to Evermore, her agent kept trying to convince her to do press opportunities or parties out in LA but she just wasn't interested in any of it. All she wanted to do was stay at home and stare at her phone, hoping maybe if she waited long enough and hoped, maybe she'd hear from the person she missed most. Was that too much to ask? She knew she was giving her space right now but this space was killing her, the not knowing where they stood was killing her. 

Her feelings weren't dulling down, if anything since they parted they had only made her long more and more for her. Ivy had just finished cooking dinner and settled herself in front of the TV in her pajamas, she had spent the past week or so like this, just trying to find anything to cheer her up. She was just getting into the story when she received a call from guard at the gate telling her there was someone insisting they wanted to be let inside. Ivy perked up for a moment wondering if maybe it was who she hoped it was before saying to let whoever it was come up to the house. 

In her curiosity and perhaps even desperation she completely forgot what she was wearing or the fact she wasn't wearing any makeup as she headed to the door so she could peer outside to see what was going on. 

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HumanPermalink Reply by ✓ Taealha Kim on March 30, 2024 at 17:53

She felt like her entire world just crashed down, honestly. It was so unlike Taealha to behave this way. Usually, she is well composed and could keep calm even under a lot of pressure. That’s the whole reason why she was the perfect candidate to work where she’s working at now. It’s the reason why she’s good at what she does. But now, seeing her one and only beloved cat being sick like that, it scared the living daylights out of her. Taealha needed Leo, she couldn’t fathom what would happen if she were to lose him. Even though they were already at the clinic, all she could think about is what would happen if things don’t go the right way.

After giving Leo to the people responsible, she was so grateful to find out they were still operating at such a late hour. She was pacing back and forth for a while until one of them came by to give her a glass of water to calm down because her face was pale with fear and worry. The dark haired human sat down and took a few sips of the water before setting the glass on the table next to her, holding her head down as she tried to stop the negative thoughts from flooding in. So she averted her gaze from the floor and to Ivy instead; her savior.

She had no idea how many times she has helped her up until now. Sure, Taealha was hurt that she hid the fact that she’s a big celebrity from her but she has come to accept that it was for her own protection. Despite everything, she still helped her like this. She dragged Ivy to sit next to her and leaned her head against her shoulder, as if to get comfort from the other woman, god knows that’s what she needed. Her hand was still tightly clasped around the initia’s and she was even drawing circles, as she tried to calm down.

There was nobody there at the corner of the waiting room because there were only a few personnel left and most were busy doing their work. There was only a television and a few seats at the waiting room. It was clear that she was shaken by what’s happening and couldn’t find a way to turn it off. So she did what she thought would be the best thing to distract herself. Before long, Taealha found herself pressing her lips against Ivy’s and felt her shoulders loosening.


InitiaPermalink Reply by ✓ Ivory Tessa Blake on March 30, 2024 at 18:30

Watching as Taealha paced the floor she could feel the pain and worry radiating from her and it was stressing the Initia out, everything about this was outside of her control and it felt stressful to her, not being able to do a single thing to change the situation. Her eyes followed her, biting softly on her lip as she tried to thing of something she could say, but Ivy wasn’t all that good with words of comfort and nothing seemed to be enough. She perked up a little when Taealha turned her gaze towards her though, attempting to give what she hoped was a comforting smile in her direction.

Before long she found herself sitting beside her, the two of them sitting in the corner away from everyone else in the room, to her luck, people didn’t seem to pay either of them much mind, no doubt more worried for their beloved pets than they were about possibly spotting a celebrity. When Taealha reached for her hand, she threaded her fingers through hers, gently squeezing it every so often to remind her she was there.

When Taealha moved again, she naturally turned towards her, assuming she had something she wanted to say, so she was surprised to find the human moving in closer than expected, but she was quick to pick up on her cues and her lips met her halfway, gently kissing her while bringing her arm to shield them from view protectively. As though she could shield the human from everything…the pain…the worry…she wanted to protect her from it all.

She gently stroked the human’s hair, pulling back for just a moment to take a long breath “It’ll be okay” she whispered softly, it had to be, there was no other outcome she could accept.


HumanPermalink Reply by ✓ Taealha Kim on April 2, 2024 at 18:12

She definitely felt like her world crashed and burned. It hurts, badly. But she was grateful that she wasn’t alone. The clothes she was wearing was thankfully far more decent compared to the one she wore upon running towards Ivy’s estate earlier. Even now, seeing the Initia sit next to her, holding her hand while trying to comfort her in her way.

Taealha thought she couldn’t fight her way out of this sorrow, like she couldn’t find her way out at all. There was no exits, nothing. But then came Ivy who provided her an escape hatch. Kissing her was not what she expected to do, it was nowhere near what she has planned. However, the human felt relieved and comforted greatly by her response to it. Ivy was kissing her back, she didn’t push her away. By the time she pulled away, Taealha stared at the Initia with wide eyes and a flushed face, her lips looked as if she just finished kissing someone.

She could only nod and whimper when Ivy said it’ll be okay. She hoped that would be the case, that Leo would be fine and perhaps they could also fix what went wrong between them. They certainly have nothing but time now that they’re stuck there waiting for updates on her poor cat. She leaned against the Initia and typed “I’m sorry for kissing you… I was so anxious it was the only thing I could think of… and it felt nice” In fact, it made the human peel away from reality. “I hope I didn’t make you uncomfortable…”


InitiaPermalink Reply by ✓ Ivory Tessa Blake on April 10, 2024 at 19:17

Ivy didn’t know much about comforting others but she knew she wasn’t moving from this spot until the vet came out and told them that Leo was going to be okay. The Initia had met Taya’s cat a couple of times and he had always been pretty sweet with her, friendlier than the average cat she had met at least and she know how important he was to the human. She rubbed her thumb against the top of her hand gently.

The kiss was soft, their lips moving against one another in a way that said plenty of things they couldn’t say directly to one another. It spoke about how she’s here for her and would come in a moment if it meant she could help. It said I miss you, I miss you like crazy, I missed you so much that I want to explode. When they finally parted, she gently tucked her hair behind her ear, she was still so damn beautiful.

Ivy pulled out her phone when she noticed Taya holding hers, watching the screen as she waited to hear what she had to say about…that. She shook her head immediately upon reading it “Don’t be sorry…” she typed back without a second of pause “I’m not sorry about anything, it makes me happy…knowing I can do anything to distract you even for a moment” She bit her lip softly “Leo is really lucky to have you” she added as she glanced over at her. “Do you want some coffee?”


HumanPermalink Reply by ✓ Taealha Kim on April 12, 2024 at 16:14

It felt warm, to have someone else holding her so closely like this. She forgot how it felt because most people only stayed close to her because she was an easy person. To be fair, Taealha is always civil and nice to others. It was probably why people thought it was easy to flirt with her and sleep their way into it, only to leave her dry after they had their fill.

But Ivy wasn’t like that, no she was sure the Initia wasn’t like that. The first time she met her, it was as if she was confused but once Taealha realized it was because the other female didn’t expect for her to not know her identity as a celebrity. The kiss was everything she thought it should be, it was no wonder she moved in to get more.

By the time she pulled away, she could only stare into Ivy’s green eyes with the softest look ever “You’re so nice… and so kind” she typed. When she was asked whether she wants any coffee “Yes please… can we… go and get coffee together? I need fresh air…”


InitiaPermalink Reply by ✓ Ivory Tessa Blake on April 13, 2024 at 13:33

As the two of them waited, Ivy gently rubbed the human’s back in circles, soothingly the same way her mother had done for her when she was really young and got upset. She wasn’t sure how much any of what she did helped but she did know in that moment that she would stay all night until she was sure things were going to be okay.

Ivy’s gaze softened a little when she stared back at her, both holding the look for a moment, they couldn’t say much in words but weirdly that felt comforting to the Initia, because Taya’s eyes didn’t lie and right now, they were filled with such emotion that it made her heart lurch a little in her chest. “Okay, there should be some places around here still open” she commented before heading up to the desk.

“My friend and I are going to head out for some air but if you could please give me a call if anything changes” she commented in a hushed voice, the desk staff looked to Taealha for approval before finally asking her to write down her number. She did so before the clerk asked “Are you who I think you are?” Ivy bit her lip for a moment and then nodded “I am…but right now I’m just…a friend of someone with a very sick cat” she mumbled.

The girl nodded in response and assured her she wouldn’t say anything to which the Initia thanked her. Before long she returned to Taealha, offering her hand to her as the two of them headed out of the clinic and over towards a dimly lit late-night cafe across the road.


HumanPermalink Reply by ✓ Taealha Kim on April 17, 2024 at 16:50

The entire time Ivy was drawing circles behind her back, the human was busy staring at her with the same puppy eyes she gave every single time. She was weak for her, there’s nothing else to explain how much she feels for the Initia. Taealha was supposed to be mad but how can she be mad when this woman right here still protects her? How can you find someone better? The answer is you don’t.

She watched as the brunette went up to the receptionist counter to talk to them about how they will be gone for a while, fiddling with her fingers as she stood up later to walk with her. When Ivy offered her hand, Taealha didn’t think much and clasped hers without saying a word as they walk out of the clinic and make their way to the cafe nearby instead.

She waited until they ordered their drinks at the counter and sat down by the corner of the room. She knew they were there to hide away from the crowd or any prying eyes and honestly, the human was more than happy to comply. She needed the privacy too, with her puffy eyes and face and whatnot. “I’m tired of hiding away… I miss you so much Ivy…” she typed, her hand reaching out to touch hers from across the table. “I hate staying away from you… I keep thinking about you. I keep thinking about us… what we could have been if I just closed one eye and pretend to be ignorant.”

Ivy being a celebrity didn’t bother her. There was no reason it would, but she was particularly irked by the fact that she lied to her and Taealha wondered what else she lied about. Still, it was not something she should have sulked over for weeks. “I’m sorry for ignoring you… I came by last week to apologize and reconcile but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I miss my girlfriend…”


InitiaPermalink Reply by ✓ Ivory Tessa Blake on April 21, 2024 at 19:10

To their luck, there weren’t many people in the cafe, a couple of office workers typing away on their laptops, no doubts ready to work late into the night on some project and a friendly clerk who waved to them as they came in. Ivy followed Taealha through the room, feeling a little relieved when she picked a quite little tucked-away corner for them to sit. The initia made herself comfortable before picking up one of the menus to look over what was available on order, but nothing caught her interest so she set it back down.

Ivy bit her lip almost nervously when Taya started typing, wondering what she might have to say now the two of them were alone and urgent manners were being taken care of at the present moment. “You never need to pretend to be ignorant, I don’t want that for us” she responded to her first messages as she squeezed her hand gently “This was my fault, I got caught up in my own self, you had every right to be mad” she didn’t want her to think for a second that she did anything wrong because it wasn’t true.

“I promise you…from now on I’ll be ridiculously truthful, to the point where you’ll probably want me to shut up” she affirmed and nodded her head slowly before taking a sip of her coffee, she knew words only went so far but she was fully ready to follow it up with her actions too “I missed you…so much” she added, it all seemed ridiculous in the face of what she lost, if she was braver…if she was truer to herself none of this would have ever happened “But are you sure you can…handle this life?” it wasn’t a small thing and she wanted her to be sure.


HumanPermalink Reply by ✓ Taealha Kim on April 24, 2024 at 15:26

Her eyes never left Ivy’s stature, she was literally following her like a whole puppy, hoping that she would be noticed when it was clearly that the Initia was only even there for her. “I know for me to get upset and lash out at first was… intended. But that doesn’t excuse the behaviour I had… the treatment I gave you days after that.” Yet Ivy was still patiently waiting for her throughout it.

“How could you wait for someone like that…” Honestly, the human was in awe because if it was her, Taealha would’ve
dropped said person without looking back. But Ivy didn’t do that. When she admitted she would be truthful in the future, Taealha pinched her cheeks and chuckled “You’re cute… so cute” It was killing her to not touch her.

When asked if she could handle this life, the human pursed her lips and nod gently after a while “I’m sure I can… I can try. I
don’t know what it will entail but I like you… Ivory Blake. And I don’t want to lose you again… never again.” What was the price of liking a celebrity again? “If you would like me in your life the way I want you in mine… I would be most grateful.” Of course Ivy wanted her to be sure but Taealha never been more sure in her life. “So… how do you think dating a celeb would go? What do I have to think and watch out for?”


InitiaPermalink Reply by ✓ Ivory Tessa Blake on April 25, 2024 at 22:37

Ivy shook her head and reached to squeeze her hand gently to reassure her that she didn’t think she did anything wrong “I broke your trust” she responded and nodded solemnly because there was no denying it, her finding out like that was cruel and unfair and if she had the chance to go back she would change plenty “Honestly…I was scared you’d never want to talk to me again” she confessed.

“Well…what we have isn’t just average right?” she responded to her questioning how she could wait for her “I felt it…we have something…special” and she couldn’t shake that feeling, she really cared about Taya in a way she hadn’t about anyone else, she felt so protective over her, which is she felt so guilty knowing she had been the one to hurt her and not being able to take that back or undo it.

She gave her a look when she pinched her cheeks, the kind that said you’re only getting away with this because of who you are. “I can tell you that things won’t be easy…they’re nosy and they want to know everything…when we go places, people will want to take pictures of us so they can sell them to magazines…people will question who you are what your intentions are…it’s…a lot” she nodded slightly.

“But we don’t have to go public right away…if you’re more comfortable…we can be just us for a while” they would just have to be careful about how they behave in public so that rumors didn’t start and people didn’t question them. “It’s a lot to take on…I’m a lot to take on” she confessed before press a soft kiss to her cheek “But I want to make this work…more than anything…”.


HumanPermalink Reply by ✓ Taealha Kim on May 1, 2024 at 16:50

The human stared at the Initia with solemn eyes, because while she might have wanted an apology to come from the other female, she didn’t want it like this. It has only come to her to realize this was nothing of what she thought she wanted back then. Taealha was just influenced by her emotions.

“I would never… I like you a lot Ivory Blake… Yes I would have been mad and sulked but I think all I wanted was for you to come knocking on my doorstep… coercing me to take you back…” It was stupid on her part, but the human was fickle like that. “God that makes me sound so… entitled…” She shook her head when she said that because what they had was not average, it was something more.

When Ivy told her all the things that will entail when they go public with their relationship, given the other female’s celebrity status,
Taealha found herself chewing on her bottom lip nervously “That sounds like a lot indeed…” What did she expect? Of course this was going to happen with a celebrity. All eyes were on them. But still, she wasn’t willing to break up with Ivy. “The cameras would make me uncomfortable just like every average person but… I like you more than them. It’ll be hard but I can learn…”

She liked her enough to not give up. She quickly went to her side to sit closely instead of across her and leaned her head against her shoulder while taking her hand “I… want to make this work too. I want to be free… to love you. We can start slowly… can’t we?” Before she could type more, a notification popped up on Ivy’s phone, saying Leo will be quarantined for two days and that they’re free to take him home after that. “After this… then can we go home first?”


InitiaPermalink Reply by ✓ Ivory Tessa Blake on May 3, 2024 at 21:12

Ivy bit her lip and then smiled softly as she read the message looking up at her and then down again “You know…everyone always says how much they like me…but they all like the public side of me…Tessa…it feels so nice to have someone like me…Ivory” she pressed her lips together as she hit send. Reading her message she giggled softly “So you like someone who’s stubborn…I see” she’d tried to give her space as she requested by Ivy knew too well that people often said the opposite of what they actually wanted.

“Be entitled…I want to make you the happiest…” she would learn her quirks in time she was sure and they would figure out how they became…them, they would have their fights, their make ups, silly little jokes that made them laugh when no one else understood, unspoken rituals like getting ice cream before bed on a Saturday night…it would be theirs…and she was so excited to discover it.

She nodded her head “I can promise you that I’ll do everything I can to protect you from it all, I chose this life and I gave up a lot to have it, but you shouldn’t have to do that” and while people would wanna know about her, they could make sure to lock down her online accounts so people weren’t able to look up too much. “But your Instagram…it’s pretty popular right…I can’t stop people looking at it”.

She squeezed her hand softly “We can take it one day at a time” they didn’t need to shout to the world about their happiness just yet, it could be just theirs until they were ready to share it. When the notification popped up her stomach panged from nerves, but when she opened it, they informed her that Leo was stable but needed to be watched closely in quarantine. “I’ll take you home” she assured her as she finished off her coffee “But first…”

She moved into her vision and lifted her hands, very slowly signing out the words “I” then “Like” and then “You” before biting her lip hoping that she got it right.

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