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He was a mess. He was a mess, the dhampir thought as he paced the room for the 5th time in the last hour. Jae wasn't sure he had ever been quite so nervous about anything as he was for this particular night. And the stupid part of it was that there wasn't even anything to be nervous about. They hadn't even called it a date, just plans to meet up, Hanseol told him there was a place he wanted the dhampir to see and without a second thought, Jae had accepted. Except after everything that happened at the dojo just a week ago, it felt like a date. Hell, it was the first time the celestial had actually used the number he gave him the first night they met, that was a big deal in it's own right.
He paused as he caught sight of himself in the mirror, running his hands through his still bright blue colored hair, he let out a frustrated sigh, he knew he was making a bigger deal out of this than he needed to but he couldn't stop himself, he hadn't been on anything that resembled in a date in years, what was he expected to do? Was there something specific he needed to wear, was he supposed to bring a gift. He sighed shaking his head, a mess, that was the only word for it. Jae turned his eyes on the clothes he had laid out for the evening, finally giving up on deliberating and starting to change. There was no way in hell he was gonna go through all this panicking and then end up being late too. In the end, he decided on a pair of black skinny jeans which he paired with a white shirt which he tucked into the pants and then an oversized denim jacket to cover his shoulders knowing it was pretty cold out there in Evermore.
The dhampir scolded himself in his head, he didn't know why he was letting himself get so worked up over something so small, it was like all the confidence he had gained when it came to his thoughts about the fallen star had gone out the window. He just really wanted things to go well, he wanted a night both of them would be able to look back on and smile and that pressure was eating away at him. Shaking his head he turned around the mirror so that he didn't need to look at himself before grabbing his phone and tucking it away into his pocket and his wallet in the other. He eyed his house keys before picking them up, while the front door was unlocked most of the time it was probably wise to keep them on him just in case.
And before he could doubt himself any further he stepped out of the room, waving a half-assed goodbye to dumb and dumber, who responded by giving him a once over and then wolf whistling "Who's the lucky girl?" they jeered which only elicited an annoyed grunt from the dhampir as he closed the door a little harder than he needed to, the last thing he was doing was getting into that right now. He did his best to shrug it off as he headed out of the building, shaking his head a little. He waved hello to a couple of neighbors who passed him by on the way out and did his best to get a handle over his mood, this was going to be a good night, he reminded himself.
He grabbed his phone, pulling up the Uber app and ordered a lift which arrived about 5 minutes later, the air was crisp this evening but not completely unbearable in the clothing he had decided on, so at least he wasn't going to freeze to death. Climbing into the back of the car he leaned his head back taking slow breaths as he reminded himself over and over that he was putting too much pressure on himself. 20 minutes later and the driver was pulling up outside the celestial's home. Jae gave thanks to the male who had been pretty chatty the whole way here, probably sensing the nerves coming from the half-vampire in the air. Once he got out he tipped the male on the app and rolled his shoulders back.
Before nerves could swallow him whole he started walking towards the now familiar building and made his way up to the door with one last breath he reached up and knocked.
“Hey, what's wrong with complimenting someone's hands. Have you seen yours?” Finding the courage in himself to grab a hold of the dhampir's hands, he raised it up to their eye level, holding it directly under their peripheral vision. Jae's hands are slim and slender, while actually looking very pretty. No one would pay attention to that kind of body part, but he would. No idea why, but he just does. Then again, Hanseol didn't have a tendency to look and trace every outline of the blue haired male, from the top of his head till his feet. He even measured his height mentally by looking over a few times. The two seemed very similar in terms of height, which was probably why Jae looked comfortable in his clothes. Seemingly forward, the celestial liked the prospect of seeing him making the place like his own home. He's never brought anyone else over with the exception of a few clients coming over to see the progress of the animals since his base of operations shifted ever since the previous tragic incident.
The thought of bringing someone here and spend what was left of his youth that was originally stolen from him, it was a lingering thought at the back of his head. The desire to make his life more meaningful and increasing the significance to it. He wasn't the only one who preferred Jae's company for sure, Yeontan and Byul made it clear that they were willing to switch ownership in a flick of a second-- Yeontan, especially. Even animals loved the guy, how is it that he kept telling Hanseol how he wasn't real when he himself, was unearthly himself. He'd also expected for Jae's hands to feel calloused or rough due to his daily training nowadays, but surprisingly, he couldn't feel them. Guy could be biased, but he really didn't feel them. Tilting his head to the left side, he examined the dhampir's hands closely, his dark mocha hues trailing from the tip of his cuticle to his palm. “Intricating..” he mumbled to himself silently before leaving his hold on Jae's hand because, that was weird.
He would be lying if he didn't like reassurances. The celestial feeds on compliments from Jae, so hearing words of encouragement and wisdom, they were really lightening his day. Granted, he didn't exactly have anyone else to turn to for advice, maybe with the exception of Ophelia, but he was too shy to actually muster up the courage to go and talk to her personally. So far, the male standing in front of him remained the only living person who he could pour his feelings to, and talk to without feeling conflicted or held back. Perhaps it was naivety. But the celestial just wanted to live a good life from what he could salvage, was that wrong? “You know, I'm tempted to pull out a pun card and say you're still not real, because you are too out of this world.” he send a brief playful wink to the dhampir's direction before eventually breaking down into his own world of laughter. It was so bad it amused him too much.
The flour attack was very unexpected coming from him, but somehow, Hanseol wasn't surprised. Calculating the blue haired male's movements, he was able to dictate where he might turn to in the next few seconds. Though he had to admit, struggling against the latter, with the two of them fighting like kids who wanted to get the last piece of cake on the plate, tripping was inevitable. The taste of the corn flour decorating the both of them made the star cough out briefly before giving up at the smell of burnt potatoes interrupting his ‘’moment' with Jae. “Buzz kill.. I swear my place doesn't have a switch for good timing. First the furballs.. Now even food, I tell you the universe has something against us.” he pouted, his lips jutted out in retaliation to the earlier reaction as he closed his eyes momentarily. So much for talks of fate and destiny, huh Hanseol.
The thought of just pushing away the food just so he could cuddle with him and bask in each other's warmth and comfort, was really tempting. He had to remind himself that temptation leads to selfishness. Funnily, every time he does that, it was like educating a child, sometimes. Even though he was literally just reprimanding himself. But the two of them still had to eat. What kind of host would he be if he didn't even feed his guest? Right, did he mention the cold marble floor didn't even feel cold against him when they rolled over there? Yeah. It didn't. When Jae got up, Hanseol was about to follow suit until the cloud of flour fell on him because one, Jae stood up. Two, he dusted it off him. So now, he's a flour monster, basically. Thanks to a certain person. Dusting the flour off his eyesight so it wouldn't hinder his vision, he gave Jae a look that says ‘you brat'. No words were needed, but it doesn't necessarily mean there shouldn't be words formed.
Pulling himself up to get up, he huffed a few times and the flour fell from his bangs. He gave a look that implied he was not amused at all, even though both of them knew it's the direct opposite. “You don't say.” he murmured, before shaking the flour off him. “At least it's corn flour. Such a waste of good flour though.” he exclaimed sternly while glaring playfully towards the equally covered in flour dhampir who's having the time of his life laughing. Shortly after, Yeontan cane scurrying to the kitchen and licked the corn flour as it barked god knows what. “Congrats, Tan. You found someone just as mischievous as you. For once, the kitchen mess is not yours to hold alone, Ser Pomeranian.”
Ushering him off so he could change while he finished up his cooking properly, Hanseol pushed the male from behind and gave Yeontan to him. ‘You can go take a few clothes from my room. You smell like corn flour. I know it's delicious but I'd rather not have my dogs go high on it. I'll finish up everything without burning. I can't afford any distractions, after all.” he chastised lightly and told him to make himself at home while he resumed his work. It might seem very funny and literally worth nothing just thinking about Jae's words earlier, not that neither of what the dhampir has said was worth nothing, it was quite the opposite. But, he wondered if he ever found or stumble across something he could not do. One of the habitual trait of his, he blanked out and stared into the space for a long while before trying to pinpoint if he ever experienced any form of difficulty trying to excel in a particular department. “History. Geography.” he suddenly said out of the blue halfway through his cooking when he noticed Jae's presence afterwards.
Turning his gaze on Jae, he repeated the two words again. “I have bad navigation and sense of direction. Could've killed me with a compass. I tend to misplace the dates and chronological events on history too. You asked me what I was bad at, that's some of it.”
Jae was still wondering what the big deal about his hands was when the celestial took them in his own, studying them intensely, the dhampir was a little surprised by the gesture but he allowed the fallen star to move the both of them as he wished. Whilst Hanseol was intently studying him, Jae watched the concentration on the celestial’s face take over, the intensity of the way that Han gazed was a little frightening at times, like the other male was seeing so much more than what was actually there, perhaps that was the way his artistic brain worked, taking in every little minute detail. Hanseol did that often, though Jae doubted he noticed. The dhampir noticed the little crinkle in his forehead he got when he was focusing on something, it was the only time it showed up on the usually careless seeming male “Funnily enough, I have seen my own hands” he commented, though he made no attempt to pull them away from the star’s grip.
The celestial’s touch against his was strangely intimate, despite the fact that he was quite literally having judgment passed on his hands, he liked the warm feeling of the star’s fingertips as they brushed over his and he had to remind himself that this wasn’t the moment to tangle them together with the fallen star’s. When Hanseol let go, Jae found himself breathing out, he hadn’t even realized he’d been holding it. Why was it that such a moment felt so nerve-wracking to him?
Throughout the night the two of them seemed to be doing a kind of dance, testing what was and wasn’t okay, figuring out the boundaries of this thing they were beginning. They both seemed to be pretty good at saying nice things about one another, that was easy to Jae, especially because the more time he spent with the celestial the more things he noticed about him. The dhampir could easily reel off a whole list of things he liked about the fallen star. What was harder for them both, or at least for Jae, was dealing with their own insecurities, of which there were many. And Jae knew those weren’t just going to disappear, they would have to work their way through them with time. What was easy though, was joking with one another, they both seemed to have a playful youthful nature that melded well, when Jae was feeling in doubt about what to say or do he turned to humor. “Says the guy who literally fell from the sky” he responded before laughing himself, man the celestial could be pretty cheesy with his words at times.
The other line that Jae found it hard to know when and when not to cross, was how much the celestial was okay with being touched. There were moments where it felt natural, like how their hands had threaded through one another before the rain had come pouring or how easy it had been to get lost in Hanseol’s kiss back there in the dojo. And then there were others where the dhampir doubted himself, felt the need to reign himself in so that the star would feel comfortable around him. All of that worrying seemed to go out the window as the two of them found themselves on the ground, however. It was exhilarating, being so close with the other male, even if it was only for a few moments before they were interrupted. Jae gave the celestial a soft smile as he pouted over what had happened, he was half to tempted to just lean in and kiss that pout away, but even a kiss like that wasn’t worth risking burning the house down.
As Jae pushed to his feet he hadn’t even thought about all the flour and how it would scatter all over the celestial but the look Hanseol shot him after it happened spoke enough words. The dhampir gave him a sheepish grin before looking around the room for a garbage can and then heading over to it and tipping the burned contents of the pan into it. Well, Jae might not be the best cook in the world, but at least he stayed around to clean up the mess right? Perhaps he did feel a little guilty considering it had been his fault after all. As he turned back towards the celestial he couldn’t stop the laugh as he noticed the way he was entirely caked in the white powder, Jae had come off the cleaner of the two of them in the end despite him being the one to take the initial hit from the ripped bag.
He felt a little bad for laughing but he couldn’t stop himself, especially when Hanseol shot him an unamused look and then Yeontan came running in and started barking like he was laughing too. Jae smirked a little as the other male called it a waste of flour “Oh how you wound me with your sharp words daystar” he teased as he clutched his chest a little dramatically. Despite Hanseol feigning annoyance, the dhampir was sure he had enjoyed the moment just as much as Jae had. Neither of them was under any intention to stop and probably wouldn’t have it if wasn’t for the food “Uh excuse you, I am far more mischievous” he commented before winking “Sorry Yeontan” Jae had always been a bit of a prankster, just part of his lighthearted and somewhat childish nature he supposed.
Jae laughed as the celestial ushered him out of the kitchen, taking the small fluffy pup into his arms and cuddling against his fur “Well at least someone appreciates my attention” he commented with a sly chuckle as he was pretty much chased out of the kitchen by the other male. Jae shot the dark-haired celestial a look over his shoulder but shrugged as he carried the pup with him along the hallway and headed into the room with the door Hanseol had been hiding behind earlier. Walking in the set the Pomeranian down on the floor before he trailed his eyes over the room. Without a word, he moved the perch on the edge of the bed, so this was the celestial’s home huh. He took the moments of quiet to take in everything that had happened, catching his own reflection in the mirror, he saw the flour that was still caught in his eyebrow and laughed softly. Man, this was so much more than he could ever hope before, he thought to himself as his finger trailed over his own lips, remembering the feeling of the celestial’s against his, his expression widened into a genuine and bright smile. That fuzzy feeling in his stomach may scare him half to death but god did he want more.
Realizing he was just sitting there, smiling like an idiot to himself, he shook it off, heading into the ensuite and washing off his face, making sure to get all of the flour on his face and then he brushed down the powder from the shirt he was wearing over the sink. Thankfully it was actually pretty easy to get off and didn’t stain and so he decided he didn’t really need to change. Instead, he took the time to breathe and get his head together, he swore it was always spinning just a little faster when he was around the fallen star. He liked the feeling though, it was electric, it made him feel more alive than he knew how to describe. Taking a long breath he spoke to himself in a hushed breath “Confidence” he repeated the same words he had told himself before he left and then he turned back to the room, heading through it, his eyes swept over the fallen star’s living space, taking in the little details of his personality there, the pens and pencils just in reach if he got the urge to write something, the neat way things were organized reminding him of the male’s adversity to mess. A wry smile racked his expression as he headed back through the door he came in.
He had walked quietly back into the kitchen, leaning against the doorframe as he watched Hanseol cook, he had that focused look on his face again. This time instead of moving towards him the dhampir just admired the view for a little while, though of course the celestial knew he was there and spoke to him softly. Jae arched a brow confused before Han explained his rationale behind the words, the blue-haired male nodded gently, he could tell it was hard for the celestial admit things he wasn’t good at, a pride thing he supposed. Jae leaned his head against the door frame as he watched the male continue his task, the dhampir’s gaze could be described as affectionate, or awestruck, perhaps even disbelief. He was snapped out of it when he heard a yap from down by his feet and he chuckled looking down at his partner in crime “I know right” he spoke under his breath, he really was the luckiest person he knew, though he glared at the pup for outing him and he turned his gaze away, literally anywhere else.
Clearly, the saying that some people don't notice the littlest things about themselves were true. Jae might have seemed confused by the time Hanseol paid immense amount of attention on his right hand alone, like any artist would, while studying every intricacy of the fingers and palm. It was cute, considering most of the time it was Hanseol who's always clueless. To see this brief change was admittedly a new thing but it didn't mean it wasn't enjoyable. Tilting his head slightly to the left side, he pursed his lips lightly before letting the concentration take place. It was almost as if he was studying something so fragile that if he touched it any other way, the hand would've broke like glass.
Glancing over to the dhampir upon hearing his remark, he chuckled. “Of course you have. It's your hand, Jae. You kinda see them every moment of your day. But I'm not surprised you don't notice how beautiful they are, the humility radiates big energy from you. That must've been the reason.” he quipped, before letting go of his hand entirely. It seems like he's got what he needed, internally measuring up the lines and dots from his head, enough to last him a quick sketch afterwards. Despite not really paying attention to anyone but Jae, it seemed that both of them had learned more and more about one another. It surprised the celestial that he was able to learn more about himself considering he initially thought there was nothing much to him. Jae proved that wrong. Hearing his listing one by one of his traits that he noticed, his tendencies, his habits, it brought a smile on him. Not only did the dhampir took the time to analyze attentively, but he also helped him understand the things he never knew about himself.
The blue haired male appeared to have a knack at humor, which makes everything a lot lighter and laughable. Serious and dull settings were colloquial to Hanseol, but if it was possible, he didn't wish to undergo then with Jae. Admittedly, he understood this wouldn't last forever, some things s were never meant to last a lifetime, but he intends to make the best of it so he'll bask in this a little while longer, if possible. “True. I kinda did literally fell from the sky. I can't even say anything around it. But I'm a star. You could be an alien for all we know.” he gaped in awe, covering his mouth with his free hand and feigned an accusatory look. “Granted, a very handsome and attractive alien, but still.” he trailed off, before finding it hard to actually see it as something serious and ended up chortling loudly, so much it called Byul over.
He noticed the look Jae had when they fell over. As if knowing what he was thinking in a deep insight earlier, he clicked his tongue. “A kiss isn't worth burning my place down. It's hard to get into contracts with them, I swear. So many paperworks.. I needed to provide my parents paperworks as well, even though they're literally long gone.” he complained and got up. “I still don't get what they even do with all those papers. Hardly doubt they actually used it to seal a lease.’ The celestial hated ambiguity, it hindered him from being able to conclude whatever that will happen next. In his kind of life, interesting and concluding was compulsory and essential. Hanseol crossed his arms and stared at the dhampir who seemed to have the time of his life laughing at his current state. “I'm glad you find this funny, dhampy.” he huffed and proceeded on chasing him out by bribing him with Yeontan. He would love to keep playing around, but eventually they needed to eat, and Hanseol would prefer if he finished everything first. Only then, would he be free to do anything else.
“상처가 될 것 같아? 이 새끼. (You think this is hurtful? You brat…)” There it seemed the inner hyung in him just came out crashing through the front door, ready to whip the male back into shape. “I thought you could've helped me with Yeontan because the little devil is a devilish little furball but no, you ended up being more mischievous. What have I brought into my household.” he facepalmed, the look on his face really showcasing the life just leaving his body because he has more to deal with. “I told you, you're a gremlin.” Shaking his head, he resumed his work quickly as fast as his hands would allow him to, while Jae got himself occupied in changing into new clothes. Well- top only. Though he did hear the small remark the dhampir shot his way and he was ready to run over and give him a piece of his mind. “Appreciates your attention? Really, you wanna burn the whole place down?”
Regardless of the caked look on the star, the flour surprisingly didn't get into any of his cooking. By increasing the heat and kindled it with oil a little bit more, things didn't take twice as long as it should. By the time Jae came back, which surprisingly, he was able to sense, the celestial was already halfway done with his chore. The potatoes were cooked well and the beef, medium well, even though he marinated them into bulgogi. When he said he wished to do home cooked meals, he wasn't kidding. There wasn't a lot of Korean food restaurants here, it's an achievement if they can spot more than one. Even if they were able to pinpoint the location, the taste wouldn't be the same. Humming a self made tune he generated a few days ago to himself, it didn't take him long to finish everything up. While he was preparing the plates and poured the content before decorating them, he heard the rice cooker's ding, indicating the rice was already cooked.
He didn't have to decorate them, since in the end, it was just the two of them eating. But the perfectionist in him just wanted everything to be perfect. Could you blame him? The guy he liked in within the same vicinity as him. Of curse every effort was going to go over the roof. There were plenty of side dishes from radish, kimchi, and tofu soup. No idea where he got the kimchi from, probably made it on his spare time, as the celestial seemed to have quite of it. Beckoning for the dhampir to come over and join him, he allowed a small smirk to travel up his lips. “Staring is rude, darling. If you wanted to stare, at least tell me first. So I can stare just as equally as you.” he teased. The sweetened potatoes were placed on another plate but he noticed something weird. “It stuck..” He tried shaking off the potatoes from the plate but to no avail, it didn't work. “The flour probably got in the sugar without me noticing. This is some strong potatoes..” He decided to play around with the plate, rolling it over because it resembled a lot like the synthetic food decoration you'd see displayed at malls. “대박 (Daebak..)”
Jae chuckled as Hanseol commented on the dhampir’s level of humility, it wasn’t exactly a secret at this point that the half-vampire struggled to take a compliment, he had always been raised like that, the kind who didn’t really shout about themselves, Jae would much rather say nice things about someone else than himself. Jae had to wonder for a moment why the fallen star needed to look quite so closely and in detail and then he realized that he was probably trying to memorize how they looked for one of his sketches “You know I could just take photos for you instead” he suggested, though his voice was more of a shy mumble than anything. The dhampir didn’t really take photos at all, at least not of himself anyway, he was a little insecure when it came to things like that.
Jae had lived a mostly lighthearted life so far, other than the pressures he had from his family to succeed, the dhampir had for the most part been free to be happy, he had friends and good memories, he had stories to tell too. If there was one thing that the dhampir loved most in life it was being able to put a smile on someone’s face, especially when that person was special. Jae tilted his head to the side in confusion when Hanseol brought up the topic of aliens “Knowing what I do about the supernatural I wouldn’t go as far as to say there are no such things as aliens but” he arched one of his thick brows “Really?” he asked, though the amusement was evident on his expression before he joined Hanseol in laughter, though that blush returned again as he recognized the words the celestial had used to describe him.
Jae was still laughing as Han chastised him for even entertaining the idea of letting the potatoes burn just a little longer, he pressed his tongue to the roof of his mouth and gave a slightly sarcastic smile in the celestial’s direction, though he didn’t interrupt him as he went on his little rant about housing and paperwork “Believe me I know that feeling, I’ve been getting….into that” he paused, realizing what he was saying “I mean I was reading through the lease in case..” that didn’t sound any better and so he left it unfinished, shaking his head slightly and hoping the other male didn’t press it. Instead, he focused himself on the dark-furred pup who was nestled in his arms “Gotta learn to laugh at the misfortunes Han, otherwise you’ll be too caught up to see the light” which was ironic, considering the celestial literally emitted light.
Jae was still laughing as the two of them bickered, it didn’t feel hurtful of course, it was just harmless joking around, the dhampir just liked to rile the celestial up sometimes to see how he reacted, Jae knew over that catastrophic persona the fallen star was playing, he was enjoying himself too “Believe me this rascal is nothing compared to the trouble I can bring” albeit most of it happened to Jae without him even trying but that was irrelevant. The dhampir buried his face into the furball’s fur for a moment and laughed softly as he picked him up to wave a goodbye to the celestial. When Han shouted down the hall to him Jae chuckled “If it would get you to kiss me like that again I’d consider it” he teased,a smirk gracing his lips as he headed into the room set down the pup to run free.
It didn’t really take that long for Jae to actually sort out the flour, flour was just powder after all, it came off pretty easily. But the chance to look around Hanseol’s room was too tempting for the dhampir to resist and so he took his time, taking in the little details, imagining what the celestial’s life was like, living here every day. The place was beautiful, no doubts about that, far over the price bracket of anything Jae would be able to afford in the next few years at the very least, then again, it had been his choice to give up a career that would have paid much more for his passions. By the time he was done he could smell the food from across the building, it smelled amazing and the dhampir’s stomach grumbled in response. Okay maybe he was a little hungry.
Jae ran his tongue over his bottom lip when he realized he’d been busted, okay maybe he had underestimated Yeontan’s mischievousness. Shaking himself out of the daze he was in he moved closer to the other male, pointedly meeting his eyes in response to the comment he made “Better?” he asked with a sly smile gracing his lips, though he had been caught off a little by the sarcastic pet name Hanseol had used, that was the second one this evening. Jae wasn’t going to apologize for staring, or perhaps the better word for it was probably gazing. His attention was however moved to the plate which the other male commented on, Jae had never seen actual food look like that before, his expression was a little dumbfounded as the other male picked up the plate and turned it over and the potatoes stayed in place “That actually looks like the models they give to tourists” he commented still a little shocked or perhaps strangely impressed the other male was able to do that accidentally.
Jae felt like he hadn’t done much to help and so he pulled open a few drawers until he found the silverware drawer and pulled out a couple of pairs of chopsticks and then set them down on the counter “Alright I can at the very least help you with setting the table” that had always been something his parents got him to do when he was younger, whenever they made a meal, he and his sister were in charge of making sure the table was ready “Though you’re gonna have to tell me where to find stuff” he didn’t live here after all, though he’d already found the kitchen pretty easy to navigate thanks to the fact that the star seemed to be pretty organized.
Training his dark mocha hues carefully on the sight of Jae's slim and slender fingers, Hanseol was sure at this point, he's measured the height for every finger alone. Being an painter and drawer all his life, he's adapted the ability to pinpoint and spot calculations and perhaps, everything, related to art. It took him time, but even during his time being held captive in the cold cell for decades long, he managed to make use of what was there. A few straws of hays, pebbles and rocks alike? He remembered sharpening a rock pointy enough so he was able to carve something against the walls. The cells were steel, which rendered them weak and useless of their abilities to be used to bust themselves out. Without them, they were very much like humans, no enhanced strength keep agility to aid them, so they couldn't even break down the doors even if they wanted to. It's becoming quite frequent for a few weeks, the dreams, the memories. It wasn't as if he chose to take a walk down his memory lane, but it just came naturally, leaving him no route to escape.
In time, he accepted it to be a reminder of how much he was supposed to cherish the life he has now, because in all honesty, the celestial understood that he has been granted a second chance at life. It was confusingly difficult at first, adapting to the modernized state of everything, but he gradually got better at sorting it out. With he exception of a few gadgets of course, he knew how to utilize them but not so much when it comes to remembering he could text Jae just as easily. He does that now, a few times occasionally when he's bored, but would prefer the orthodox way of seeking the dhampir out on his free time. He was sure to plan it accordingly to the latter's schedule too, as he couldn't be selfish and think about only himself. It was a two way effort, either way. Hearing that the dhampir offered to take a photo of his amazingly sculpted hands, he gaped for a moment. It wasn't a normal occurrence for someone to take a picture of their own hands, and it was the first Hanseol's heard of it.
“You would do that?” he quipped timidly, the light airy tone making it almost inaudible to anyone else who didn't have enhanced hearing like Jae. “That's highly considerate of you, Jae. I would've only requested a few more minutes to study the structure for researching purposes, but having a visual interpretation to remind me if I forgot is a whole level.” Whilst scratching the back of his head, the celestial grinned sheepishly. “Some people think it's creepy.. So I never asked around about it. Besides, I've never.. Drew a person before. Not the living neither the dead. Only landscapes, the nature, and animals. I like to think I only drew my muse from picturesque sceneries.” The star was so deep into telling his number one hobby to the dhampir, so much he actually forgot he literally implied that Jae was considered a ‘picturesque scenery' to him that enabled him to keep running steadily on his muse drive.
Scrunching his nose up as a frown was displayed across his face, he was giving the dhampir a look that questioned his authenticity. “The audacity you reek, dhampy. Come on, supernaturals existed. You're a love child between a vampire and a human. You're half vampire, for star’s sake. I'm a literal shooting star that so happened to receive the honor to crash land on earth on some random night. How are aliens not even considered legit?” His pupils dilated slightly while talking about it, signalling his unprecedented randomness and enthusiasm on the topic. “So ignorant.” he shook his head and huffed in displeasure playfully. “Ugh, I wish you would just move in already, and then maybe I'll just push all those lease and housing problem things on to your plate instead of stressing over it at 4 in the morning.” It's an actually canon. Hanseol does stress about the papers at 4 in the morning, one time. It's also an excuse for him to have a much easier time to see the male whenever he wants to, because let's be real, Hanseol Park is a fluff. He craves affection and attention, much like his pets. He likes them, so why not? He also wished to provide a solution to Jae's life crashing student manual guide. Living with those kind of roommates he's only had the chance to meet once, must've been a torture.
“But I am the light. Literally.” he facepalmed, the look on his face was making it priceless and worthy enough to be a meme. Now, if only someone would've taken a picture of that and add a few captions. He probably didn't even need one to surmise them. “I feel like I'd be walking into an uncharted territory if you do end up becoming a resident in this place. I already have Yeontan to deal with, do you have any idea how hard it is to sleep with him around if he doesn't get his bedtime story? Or how difficult it is to read through the paperworks and documents when he demands attention? He'll literally sit on them, until he gets it.” He couldn't remember the last time he had a mundane way of reading and signing the documents regarding his work. It was stressing but all in good's hour.
Though, having the Pomeranian by his side helped boost his mood, and the devilish furball was just too cute to deny. Speaking of which, Jae had made the puppy wave its paw towards him as he said his goodbye. Still shaking his head at the dhampir's playful antics, he wondered how different he was from the first time that the star's met him. There were sides he thought he never would unlock in Jae, and he was enjoying every bit of it. Following the blue haired male's sly remark about burning the house, he scoffed and actually placed down the spatula on the side before turning around to face him by the living room. “You do realize you kinda just need to ask, right? Who would ever deny that.” he pointed his index finger towards the male and highlighted his face while making random air gestures. He was acting like a living meme, it's unreal. “I know I wouldn't.” he teased before turning his attention back to his cooking.
While giving out his finishing touch to the meals, he almost lost himself when Jae stared at him pointedly. “Okay, that's creepy. I take it back.” he chortled lightly before placing the bowl down on the table cloth. When the dhampir asked where all the cutlery were at, he pointed at the cabinets near him. “The plates are at the second row of the lower cabinet, at your 3 o’clock. The spoons and chopsticks in the 2nd drawer from the left.” Exactly like what the male predicted, Hanseol was surprisingly neat and arranged. Except when he's being all artsy, then all the mess is going to end up somewhere. A stain he'd probably spend days to get rid of. Unfortunately, he wasn't always moving at an orderly fashion. His recklessness makes an exception to it very colloquially. Returning his gaze back at the plate where the sweet potatoes were still glued on, he eyed it skeptically before taking off his apron and got a spoon with him. Hanseol eventually poked it, and thankfully it moved after a while. “Okay, it's edible. This is a product of your playful ‘result’ today.” he scowled lightheartedly.
As the dhampir looked back at Hanseol, he caught the soft tone of his voice as he spoke almost in disbelief at what Jae offered to do, frankly the dhampir was kinda surprised he offered it himself considering how he tended to avoid cameras at all costs but it was Hanseol, of course, Jae would make an exception “Sure, it sounds important to you and that makes it important to me” he answered honestly, he looked around for a moment studying the lighting of the place, it was actually really brightly lit despite it being evening outside. Jae gave a slightly nervous smile but shrugged “It feels like a lot of pressure but I don’t find it creepy” he answered honestly “Since meeting you my writing has changed too, a new perspective I suppose” he gave a half smile, he supposed it was similar, finding inspiration in someone else. It was sweet though, the way he seemed to have influenced the other male’s talent, it made Jae feel significant.
Looking around for a moment he grabbed the star’s phone which had spotted on the table earlier and pressed the unlock button before swiping up the camera app, he stepped into the light, making sure he wasn’t casting a shadow on himself and then glanced over at Hanseol “I hope you appreciate this because I literally don’t take photos of myself for anyone” he chuckled softly and took a few photos of his hands one at a time, turning them a little to get different angles. Well since he was here anyway, might as well go for the full set right, he flipped the camera around into selfie mode and took a couple of himself, smiling slightly as he looked up into the camera. With a smirk the slid his arm around the other male’s shoulder and pulled him close against his side, Jae lined up both of their faces in the screen and took one last photo of the both of them. When he was done he cleared his throat before offering the phone back to Han.
Jae raised his brows a little in amusement as he was reprimanded over his comments on the existence of aliens, though he wrinkled his nose at the mention of love child, okay he did not need that image in his head, he did his best to shake it off though “If I start believing every myth and legend I don’t think I’d sleep at night” he admitted with a chuckle, he’d spend so much time combing over every single possibility. Sure the world was a lot bigger than there just being humans out there but it was becoming hard to keep track, especially now that species from another plane entirely were possible “Makes my brain hurt” he complained as he pressed a hand against his temple, sometimes ignorance made life easier, he kinda envied the humans who thought all of this was just from stories. Jae’s eyes widened as the other male still evidently talked about the idea of them living together, he was surprised by that, so much so that he remained in silence for a few seconds as he processed the thought “You do realize that the whole idea of that is…” he trailed off, thinking of the word for it “a lot more meaningful now” he explained, the blush creeping up on his cheeks as he spoke, it was also a lot more complicated too. Living with strangers or a friend was one thing, potentially moving in with the guy he had feelings for, was a whole different matter.
“You’re definitely something” Jae responded with a chuckle as he saw the celestial facepalm, Jae’s words were lighthearted and friendly, he had learned a lot in his life about being able to let go of the bad things that happen and search for something better, Jae did his best not to dwell too much when bad things happened, he preferred to move forward , he guessed that made him an optimist. Hearing Hanseol talk about Yeontan’s antics, Jae looked between the innocent-seeming pup and the celestial and chuckled, he could tell there was a lot of love there, no matter how much the fallen star complained about his dogs, he could see from the look in Hanseol’s eyes just how much he cared for them “Sounds like I need to borrow some of his tactics” Jae teased running his tongue over his lip.
As Jae was walking away he heard the other male’s comments and smirked to himself, glancing over his shoulder at the celestial as he heard him follow him out into the hallway, the dhampir wasn’t always nervous when it came to things like this, Hanseol just seemed to know how to hit his weak spots a little too well, but this was the first time his feelings for someone had really meant something to Jae, the first time he’d really wanted to see something come of it “I’m not the kinda guy to beg” he commented with a smirk and winked at the dark haired male as he turned his back to him and continued walking in the direction he was going before he was interrupted, Jae wasn’t a narcissist but he did really enjoy the idea of being wanted and having some control over that feeling, which probably made him a bit of a tease.
As he came back into the room, he moved to face the other male, meeting his dark gaze with the dhampir’s own “Some people find gazing romantic” he teased softly with a shrug as he moved across the room as he listened to the celestial explain where all the different things were. He gathered the plates, setting them down in front of the chairs at the table and then he grabbed the chopsticks from the counter and set them down next to the plates before sweeping back around to get serving spoons, he mentally counted the number of bowls the celestial was putting out and matched the number of spoons, plus a couple more for eating purposes. By the time he was done going back and forth, the table looked pretty well set.
Hanseol was just about done dealing with the potatoes when Jae finished, the dhampir wrinkled his nose a little at the comment Hanseol made, as he was passing the other male he leaned over to press a gentle but lingering kiss against the Hanseol’s cheek, his eyes fluttering shut for just a few moments as he did so “Tell me you didn’t enjoy it and I might feel bad” he spoke the words lowly before he pulled away, giving the fallen star a knowing look as he did so. The sultry tone faded from his voice as he rounded the table giving it one last once over before nodding “Besides, edible is far better than most of the meals back at the dorm” he commented and sighed, his roommates pretty much refused to eat anything other than take away and Jae didn’t dare to venture out of his room too much.
From afar, with time making use of the company he spent with Jae, Hanseol knew it w couldn't possibly be easy for him to offer such a thing. Both males were certified introverts by nature and choice. However, despite his rather closed off persona, Hanseol only chose to meddle in the shadows than rejoin the world to socialize. Jae, Jae was still a puzzle that the celestial has yet to solve. He hasn't even finished them ¼ yet. Whilst he did manage to piece a few, it wasn't anywhere near progression. The celestial believed he needed to delve deeper in the dhampir's life if he wished to know more about the quiet dhampir. And he would proudly take the chance if given. The fallen star felt a tug in his chest when he heard that Jae was willing to do the kind gesture to accommodate his personal endeavors. It caused him to allow a smile to make its way up to secondhand replace the grin that was already present.
Though he didn't receive nor grasp the chance to tell him his thanks on his consideration to such request and offer, when the dhampir suddenly took his phone that had been lying around a while ago. Wait, he didn't even notice where he placed his phone earlier. How was it that he was able to pinpoint them so easily? It seems that the dhampir never ceased to amaze him for each moment given.
There wasn't much in his phone per se; only a few apps that he himself didn't even actually use, mostly for the sake of decoration purposes. The only other pictures he had inside his gallery were that of his pets, ranging from Yeontan to Byul and to the clinic itself. A few picturesque ones surrounding the landscapes. He trained his gaze on the dhampir clicking the shutter a few times to capture the pictures of his hand from different angles. He was too enthralled by the sight of each angle the dhampir took, which highlighted photography skills. It was then, that he was reminded he bought a DSLR a few months ago but never actually used them yet. He didn't have the chance to use them for personal purposes and boy, was he glad Jae would remind him indirectly. Let's be real, the celestial would've forgotten he even bought that if he wasn't reprimanded over time. “Believe me, I appreciate every effort you poured into this, dhampy.” he affirmed, with slight teasing tone accentuating his words, though it did not hinder from his original intention.
While he was not really attention on the male but rather on his own thoughts, he was taken aback by the sudden hold on him as his train of thoughts were derailed when Jae pulled him close. For a brief moment, Hanseol had a wide eyed clueless look masking his face and was about to question the dhampir his intention up until he noticed the camera lens on them. Ohhh. As to play along, he went with it. Whatever Jae wanted, he thought. Surely, a picture wasn't going to do any harm, especially if it's going to be stored inside his drive just as well. “You're a devilish brat, you know that?” he murmured before nudging the male softly on the left side, pushing him away playfully. “Careful, Jae. One might think you're going soft on me.” he teased, poking the dhampir on the shoulders as the glint and twinkle of bemusement present in his orbs did not went unnoticed too. “All those words are going to end up feeding my ego again, Jae. You've seen the downside of it the first time, are you beginning to prefer them.” he feigned shock and placed his right hand over to his mouth. Dramatic brat, isn't he? Only for him, though. Specially reserved for one dhampir.
Taking the phone from his hand, he snickered to himself and tucked it inside his pockets before ushering for the male to go and take his seat already, so they could dine in. Admittedly, after the antics pulled today, Hanseol was tired and was dwelling around the areas of starvation. “It makes your brain hurt, but surely it also gives you more insight on supernatural or fantasy works, right? Imagination is a key factor, anyways.” he pointed out and played around with the handle of the spoon. “Now that I look at it, I guess living in ignorance would be far worse for me. I like the thought of knowledge too much to push it away and settle for ignorance.” he mused, because given his upbringing and past, Hanseol probably didn't wish to give up the experience he's already gained, no matter how minimal it was. When the topic of being roommates came back around for the both of them, he chuckled softly and patted the dhampir's shoulders comfortingly. “Yes, I get that it means a lot more than it used to be. Why not? There are upsides and downsides of it, I know. But isn't that what makes everything a lot more worthwhile? The progress and development in our story, doesn't that interest you?” The star wiggled his eyebrows together before eventually smirking away. “I meant what I said, place is yours whenever you want them. I mean, I'd say you'd receive free gifts being me and Byul and Yeontan but then I'd be dubbed a narcissist.”
Glancing over to Yeontan who gave him a tilt of his head in response, he growled distinctly, very much similar like a feral being, actually. “See what you're making him do, Tan? You're influencing him. You two deserve each other, even I can't stop this love story between you two. But hey, I can try.” Hanseol shook his head and turned away when Yeontan retaliated with a bark of his own. Quirking his eyebrows questioningly, he took a few looks on Jae before scoffing. “That's exactly what the opposites would say. You never know for sure, Jae.” he pointed out, a satisfied smirk sitting on top of the curvature of his lips. If looks would've been dubbed higher than it originally was, the look on Hanseol would have made a cut. He was really judging the dhampir like it was his occupation. All he could think of, was how much he really got strung over with his antics while also questioning the male over time. “No, to answer your question, no- I didn't say anything about not enjoying it. Actually, I rather enjoy them.” There was another thing that Hanseol liked to do, which was watch how flustered Jae could amount to, sometimes. It was priceless, it was worth everything.
So what did he do? He winked, obviously. Because, why not? “If it makes you feel better, you can have my cooked meals every day if you choose to move in. See, not only will have you have my company and Yeontan's. You'd also have a chef handling your meals. No better choice there, honestly. I mean, how can you turn this-” He gestured to his face and grabbed Yeontan, showing him off. “-and this, down?”
Jae had varying levels of confidence, around those he was close to, he was a very outgoing and bright persona, he liked to make jokes and tease his friends and family and he was extremely loyal to those he kept close but the dhampir tended to keep most people at arm’s length, to those people he would come across as quiet and reserved, tending to observe rather than speak. Hanseol seemed to trigger somewhat of a middle ground between those two sides for him, at times he felt completely in control, able to make jokes and tease the other male as good as he got, but other times it would just cause the breath to hitch in his throat. No one had ever made the dhampir feel as nervous as he felt at times around Hanseol as if everything he said or did was significant. It excited the half-vampire, but also frightened him, scared he may do or say the wrong thing.
As he was using Han’s phone, Jae did his best not to let his eyes wander too much over it or take in any judgment, the dhampir believed in the idea of privacy and figured anything the celestial wanted to share with him, he would do so of his own accord, he did find it interesting that the fallen star didn’t seem to have any kind of lock on his phone however. Jaesung chuckled softly when Han asserted his understanding of what the dhampir was offering to do. Jae didn’t know what it was about photos that freaking him out so much, but he was definitely that guy that untagged himself from almost all of them on social media. It may have stemmed from that fact that all the girls at his high school would always whisper about how handsome he was and being the shy person he was around strangers, Jae found it unnerving and even uncomfortable at times. But he trusted the celestial not to go posting them anywhere he didn’t want them, he wasn’t even sure Hanseol actually used any social media.
But of course to make himself less uncomfortable about the whole situation he had made the fallen star take at least one photo with him, and the photo actually looked pretty nice if he was honest, a little grainy because of the lighting but at least they were both smiling in it. He figured if the star ever wanted a reminder of tonight he could always look at the photo. Jae laughed gently as he felt the push from Han and stepped away from him, when the dark-haired male followed it up with another comment Jae sucked in a long breath in response “Maybe I am” he responded with a smile that radiated his whole face. The two of them had already admitted they had feelings for one another, Jae didn’t know why he kept holding himself back like he would be chastised for telling his truth. His teeth toyed at his bottom lip as he debated what to say “I think we’ve already established there is no stopping your ego, daystar” he teased before continuing “Maybe I find your confidence attractive” he added more honestly, sometimes Jae wished he could let go of his modesty a little, surround himself in a little of the self-pride Han seemed to have, but he just wasn’t that person
By the time the table was finally set and the food was laid out, Jae was definitely feeling hungry, he hadn’t really noticed it at first because it felt like so much was happening around him and he was just trying to keep up but now, with the smell of the food overpowering his sense of smell, he was looking forward to eating. “Imagination I have no problem with” Jae commented with nonchalant shrug in response “I can make up stories and characters and alternate universes so easily” he smiled, fiction was one of his favorite outlets, though also the kind of writing he was probably most self conscious about “Reality, however, is what scares me” maybe he just needed to get over it and accept that the world would always be filled with strange and somewhat terrifying happenings and people “Especially my own I suppose” he admitted as his eyes dropped down to the table, the dhampir still struggled with his own identity and the things that directly affected his life even now. When Han spoke about liking knowing things, Jae could agree with his sentiment, the blue-haired male shrugged “The problem is that there is never knowing everything when it comes to the supernatural, there will always be some mystery that you cannot solve” which is what made the topic itself so broad.
Hearing the other male speak about them living together again, it brought a lot of questions to Jae’s mind, like they both recognized, taking that step would certainly mean something different than the offer in the library did a few weeks back. It bright butterflies to Jae’s chest just thinking about the prospect of it all. Though his mind was sent spinning once more when the celestial spoke the word ‘our’ because that word had so many connotations to it that Jae couldn’t ignore. Jae would be lying if he said it didn’t feel a sense of elation at hearing it out loud. Our. We. Us. Collective. “Of course that interests me” he blurted pretty sharply in response not being able to stop his natural reaction from reaching his lips. He paused for a moment and pursed his lips slightly “I just don’t want to take a step too fast and ruin this in the process” it was almost like the dhampir had been bitten by some kind of honesty bug in the last few minutes he thought as he pointed between the two of them, emphasizing the idea of the two of them as a collective.
As they were interrupted by Yeontan however, the serious tone of the conversation drifted back to their usual familiar banter, this part was easy to him. Jae shrugged and gave a wry smile “I have always been a sucker for a pretty face” the dhampir commented as he looked at the little pup, he definitely felt a familiarity with the little Pomeranian that he couldn’t describe, the two of them just seemed to get along, much like Byul and Hanseol seemed to. The look on the celestial’s face as they talked was hard to pin down to words, at times Jae thought that Han was seemingly easy to gauge and at others, he literally had no clue what to think, this particular look, triggered the latter. His words, however, brought a triumphant smile to the dhampir’s lips, it was nice to have affirmation that the dark-haired fallen star enjoyed the affection the two of them shared as much as Jae did “Good” he responded with a smirk as he seated himself at the table, though he felt a chill run through him as he caught sight of the wink Hanseol sent him, curse this man always leaving him breathless without even trying.
Jae’s grin was effortless as he watched Hanseol pick up the little pup and hold him up “You’re relentless” the dhampir commented with a shake of his head, though it was incredibly flattering for Jae to know that someone respected his presence that much, he couldn’t think of a single person who had wanted to spend time with him that much in his whole life, his family included. “How’d you learn to cook?” Jae asked curiously as he picked up his pair of chopsticks in his hand and started to serve out food between the two of their plates, it only seemed fair that he helped considering he had been pretty useless during the actual cooking part. Picking up some of the food he placed it into his mouth. Savoring the taste for a moment he had an expression of delight on his face. “Wow.” he commented after swallowing. Just wow, he was quite literally in awe of what the other male was capable of, he put Jae’s range of talent to shame.
Just as Hanseol might have depicted a small sense of change in Jae, the same seemed to occur to the celestial's side just as much. Throughout the time he's known the dhampir, he began to feel a sudden rise of significance from every level in his waters. Though he was still uncertain and plague himself with reluctance to come venturing into the uncharted area, it was proven that so far it's been positive, so he's taken the chance to take his time into it. Truthfully, if asked, Hanseol would have admitted that he was actually afraid to try something new. And this- all of this, was new, to him. The paranoia that ate him for decades long manifested in a very ‘frowned-over’ situation. The time where he had nothing but negativity to him. It's been 2 years in, almost 3, but the celestial still has yet to get used to the whole concept. Although it's safe to say, with Jae, nothing was impossible for him to reach out.
Noticing the eyes analyzing his phone like it was a foreign thing, he chuckled softly and reassured the latter that he wasn't much for social life. “Don't worry, I have Instagram, Twitter and a few, but I can't remember actually using them. I only installed them at first because it was dull. Even when my coworkers asked for my contact, I only gave them my number and nothing more.” Which was evidently true, considering the star was quite old-fashioned when it comes to stuff like that. One thing didn't make him feel out of place was the clothing trend. He preferred the comfortableness against the leather jackets and hoodies. That, he could applaud proudly. It was quite possibly the only thing he found to be very convenient in the modernized and standardized life they live in today, that and the technology that would aid his work and medicinal field a tad better than before. “So you don't have to worry about me posting it and end up tagging you like the idiot I am. I got traumatized once by my coworker and that was enough bitter experience for me, no thank you.” he shuddered, while trying his best to shake the memory off. It actually did traumatize the poor celestial.
The celestial had no idea why there was still small tinge of awkwardness still filling their air, despite their not so subtle confession to one another, affirming their feelings were mutual to each other. There shouldn't be any more hints of anxiety lacing their conversation, but there was, surprising. Hanseol didn't mind it, mostly because the star never actually cared much about everything else. He was a simple person, after all. However, he is concerned with Jae's progress. This was new to him just as it was new to the star. But with Jae, he has more pressure and expectations weighing on him. At least the celestial wouldn't really mind shutting others up about his life, but what of with Jae? Would the dhampir be able to do that? It wasn't surprising to see Hanseol wanting to take care of the latter, simply because he wished the best for him.
Letting the smile travel up to his eyes to form a crescent curve, he grinned sheepishly before shrugging. “I mean, that could be true. My ego is like a black hole. Endless. You keep feeding it, it just gets bigger in time, but you have no idea where all the content went.” he emphasized the idea enthusiastically. Whenever he smiles, the youth marring the star's face was very visible for others to see. The crinkle on the side of his eyes whenever he beamed, and how rarely the smile travelled to his eyes first before curving his lips. A rarity only the dhampir seemed to experience, so far. Perhaps, the only one. “Confidence is said to be attractive by many people.” he nodded in affirmation, while radiating the smugness off him. “I'm not surprised if you do find it attractive. I mean, I am already an attractive guy, no?” He was sure if there was a way to caption this, he would've written ‘tiny font : aaaaahhhhhh’ somewhere.
“Reality scares a lot of people. You and me included. We're not immune to such thing.” he murmured silently before occupying the topic with him pushing away the negativity that threatened to spread his head with, as they eventually dismissed the topic soon enough. “If I would pick something positive coming out from thinking about reality, it would be the journey to search for our identity. You so desperately want to find solidarity within,so you'd go to every length to capture it. While searching for it, you will end up building it. That's the beauty that comes out of it-- the moment you realize that it wasn't about searching yourself, but about building and finding yourself.” Though his face and appearance would easily betray his age, his wording and actions did not. Sometimes, the stark contrast against it was very evident. “I guess that's the point where we draw a line to our limits. There's only so much a person could and should know, anyways. Curiosity killed the cat. I don't actually want to try and be another candidate.”
Snickering at Jae's sudden response to his words, he couldn't help but to shake his head at the blue haired male that sits across him. “Take your time, then. Just know all of this, they're not going anywhere. I doubt Yeontan would try to leave you even for me. He's too hooked, it's unbelievable how fast it was for him to shift to another owner. But considering it's you, I shouldn't be surprised. I am offended, though.” The celestial spared a stern and offended glance towards the Pomeranian that really had a talent on wearing an innocent face. “You'd never ruin it, though. Just thought you should know.” he quipped as he sipped his soup. “I actually have the strangest want to take care of you. I want to help with your work, cook for you, spend time with you, basically everything. That's weird, even for me. But I shouldn't find it shocking seeing as Yeontan's not the only one who's hooked.” Yes, it was still a wonder how Hanseol was able to keep a neutral face to all of that. Here he was, sparking up the words while casually eating his meal like it was the most ordinary topic to be talked over the lunch table.
“Relentless? Eh, I am persistent, I admit. Tenacity is actually a good trait to have, sometimes.” The look of judgement played across his face as he was actually judging the dhampir. But it changed when the latter asked him how he learned to cook. Pondering momentarily, he tried to recall the moments he actually bothered to cook for himself. He lived a busy life as a veterinarian, often bringing his work home daily, so it was a shift between not having time to eat, let alone cook, and work from him, so have enough time to make himself comfortable about it. “It's amazing what Google can actually do. There's plenty of easy recipes here and there. But mostly, it's from my adoptive mother's teachings. She was a housewife, who only had her husband to look after, so cooking was something she enjoyed. It was the first thing that she showed me. Shortly after she fell sick, I took over the management of caring for her, instead. I guess over time, I just got myself into it.” Playing with the spoon just in front of his lips, he pursed his lips before resuming with a smile. “Can never do justice to her cooking as she did. But I like to think cooking is all about feeling. So it leaves a distinct mark to it.”
Until now, Jae had never really been the kind of person who thought about relationships, not the kind which he wanted to last anyway, he’d dated a few people in school because he thought it was something you were supposed to do but they had never really meant that much to him. The dhampir had started to wonder if he was just broken and didn’t work like everyone else. But then he had met Hanseol and things had changed. Jae had never wanted to protect someone the way he wanted to protect Han, he had never wanted to search someone out just because he wanted to see the smile on their face until he met the fallen star. This was all new territory for him, the overwhelming feeling of wanting commitment, wanting more than just attraction, he quite literally had no idea what he was doing.
As if the fallen star could read his mind, he started talking about social media, did Jae really give away that much with his expressions? He wondered as he glanced over towards Hanseol, the dhampir had never really been all that good at covering up his emotions if he was honest, at least not around people who actually knew him well anyway “Are you sure mind reading isn’t a celestial power?” Jae commented with a furrowed brow but nodded slightly “I have a big thing about privacy” he commented “I don’t really like the idea of people being able to stalk me online so I don’t really post much” he explained with a half shrug. Strict parents would do that to you he supposed, always monitoring what Jae was doing when he used his computer “I have a blog but I write that anonymously” he added before he widened his eyes a little, he hadn’t really intended to talk about that, that blog was very personal to him. Jae coughed and changed the subject quickly “and you’re not an idiot, just semi-clueless at times” he clarified with a chuckle, though his gaze was a little shifty.
Jae hated the fact that he was insecure about a lot of things, he tried not to be, but it wasn’t something he could easily control. Most of it stemmed from his upbringing, every family wanted to look good in the eyes of others around them which meant parents put a lot of pressure on their children to be the best. Jae was raised in a society where people openly judged one another’s looks, where talents were pitted against one another and where it was hard to be considered significant if you weren’t the most intelligent person in the room. And while he accepted that was just the way society was, it had given him this need to always be better than he already is, which was hard when he saw people like Hanseol who things seemed to come so naturally to. Add onto that the fact that same sex relationships were considered almost taboo back home and the older generation opposed them greatly and that made things very complicated for him.
Jae noticed the way that Hanseol smiled at him, it wasn’t one of those polite smiles or even the kind of smile you gave around a close friend, it was an intimate one that showed the joy evidently on his face, every part of him lending to it. It was a beautiful thing to see and in the moments it happened Jae felt mesmerized by it, amazed that he was able to make someone happy like that. It did frustrate him a little though, when the dhampir was trying to be sincere and he got hubris in response, he supposed that maybe Hanseol was used to receiving those kinds of comments but Jae definitely wasn’t used to giving them and so it did feel a little disappointing when the significance of them felt lost. He averted his gaze down towards the plate instead of responding, well the star had warned him not to feed his ego right?
His attention was taken back to the dark-haired male when he mentioned his own fears of reality too, there was a certain vulnerability in the celestial’s words as he mumbled that caught the dhampir’s attention, listening to Hanseol’s insight on how to turn that fear into something positive, the way he described it spoke to the half-vampire in a way he couldn’t describe. It fitted exactly with his thoughts on how a person defined themselves, it was ever changing, always building, there was always something more you could do to better yourself. The wisdom behind that Hanseol had said made Jae smile “That’s a really poignant way of seeing things” he commented with a slight nod “I always believed that someone’s identity is always changing, as experiences and even people change us, for the better or worse” it was actually nice to be able to talk to someone about this kind of thing without being told he was too young to really know anything, just because Jae was young didn’t mean he wasn’t observant or that his opinions and thoughts were invalid “The person I am now won’t be the same person I am in a year’s time and that’s not a bad thing” he nodded, Jae hoped he could work on his own confidence in that time, become more self-aware and he supposed even learn to love himself.
Jae nodded softly, his expression thoughtful, sometimes he wondered if he was overthinking things, he tended to do that a lot. But moving in with someone like that, that was a huge deal for him and he didn’t fully understand what it would all mean. He didn’t want Hanseol to think he didn’t want to, because he did, Jae just had underlying fears he needed to get through first and honestly those would only come with time and patience. His heart felt fluttery at the way the celestial described the things he ‘wanted’ thought, he was barely able to keep eating the food because he was too busy processing all the words he heard internally. A bright blush that was impossible not to notice appeared on the dhampir’s cheeks in response, so much so that he couldn’t even keep eye contact with the other male. Damn, he was so totally caught up for the fallen star, it wasn’t even funny anymore. “I really don’t know how you can say things like that with a straight face” he expressed, daring to look up towards the other male between mouthfuls of food “Be patient with me?” he asked for that much, Jae just wasn’t in that confident place that Hanseol was right now, he wanted to be, but it would take time and experience, he was glad for the celestial’s assurance that he wasn’t going anywhere, Jae wasn’t either, he wanted to figure all this out, one piece at a time.
Jae was really enjoying the meal, he could tell that Hanseol had a lot of practice in cooking, which he supposed was only natural considering he lived alone. Jae had lived at home with his parents before coming here and while he was learning to cook for his own sanity, it had only been a few months. The dhampir kept quiet though because the topic had lead to the celestial talking about his adoptive mother, it hadn’t escaped Jae’s notice that Han tended to avoid mentioning them and Jae had never wanted to ask or pry because it was clearly a painful topic for the other male. The chance to hear a little more about her was welcomed. Jae’s lips parted as he heard the way Hanseol described her “Sounds like she’d be proud of you” he commented with a sincere smile “Carrying on her legacy in the things she taught you” and damn was he good at it, Jae had almost finished his entire plate already, it was absolutely delicious.
Jae went silent as he glanced over towards Hanseol and then back to his plate, the thoughts of the fact that Hanseol lost his adoptive parents, spent most of his time while locked up by himself and now lived alone, it all posed questions in his mind “Why me?” Jae asked before following up his completely out of the blue question with more context “From what I can tell you’ve for the most part engineered your life to be alone, sometimes I wonder if you prefer it” he hoped this didn’t sound like an attack, the dhampir was simply commenting on things he had noticed and this was one of the things he had been struggling to understand “So what makes me different?” Jae wasn’t fishing for compliments here, he was looking to understand the thought process in the other male’s mind, why of all the people in the world, he was able to change the way Hanseol Park saw the world.
The male kept focusing on the food rather than occupying his thoughts with matters that will eventually make a space in the head of his. Especially those he knew he'll never be able to shake off so easily. Had he been recalculating his life chart, he would never thought relationship would be apart of it. It wasn't as if the celestial didn't want one, of course he wanted to be given the chance to begin a new chapter of his life with someone special. Did he know he was going to find the person this early? No, not really. At first, Hanseol was hesitant to see where this is going, but the longer he thought of it, the more convinced he got regarding their current stand on this relationship. He knew just how hard it was for the latter to accept this as he did, and whilst the celestial didn't endure any burden or trouble about the eyes of others, the issues of safety did plague his mind. The dark haired male didn't wish for the dhampir to live his life like a fugitive, or being scared every single day. He also didn't want to think about any prospects of running again, if a day comes for it. Everything was becoming complicated to grasp his mind around.
However, he knew one thing. That alone, seemed to suffice for the star. All he could think of, was Jae. Literally, just him. Everything else was shrouded away in the clouds, putting on another formation. All he could think of was how precious he found the dhampir to be to him. At first, he thought it was a simple mutual attract to one another, a very casual and normal occurrence to happen to anyone. That was until the fallen star started sketching and painting the latter. It was then, that he knew how deep it went. He wasn't the best painter, no. But his visualization and depiction on every piece he did, came straight from his head. But never has he drawn someone without a model for reference. And never has he drawn someone more than once, let alone four times. Each painting with different colors and meaning, it was possible when it comes to the dhampir. A stopping point came down to it that resulted the celestial to stop denying his feelings for the blue haired male that sits before him, eating happily like he had no worries in the world. He'd like to see that look on him a lot more frequently, if possible. He just wished to protect him, in anyway, with every fiber of his being. Was that weird?
Yet, he still couldn't find the answer to said question. “I wish, hahaha- but no. Mind reading is definitely not something we have control over or was gifted with. Which I'm glad, to be honest, considering it's a direct violation of privacy itself. Can't imagine anyone else would ever want that to impose on themselves.” Hanseol, much like Jae, was big on privacy matters. He wasn't sure if it was just the conservative ways they were brought up by a similar community, or just decent manners. Maybe both. Quirking his eyebrows in response to the anonymity he spoke of earlier, he chuckled softly. “I think you miss the point of it being a secret and anonymous then? Because it's not exactly- y'know.. Secret and anonymous, if you told me.” he teased, the corner of his lips curved up into a smirk as his doe eyes flickered with amusement. Boy, was he making it hard for the celestial not to fall deeper into the pit than he already did. Things were not really going easily for him as it seems.
Seeing how fast the topic was turned around by him, he figured it was something personal so he didn't prod any deeper into it. He did just said something regarding privacy, after all. It would've been very hypocritical for him to go against his own codes. “I don't remember dubbing myself as an idiot, Jae.” he pouted, feigning hurt and offense by the dhampir's words. The light-hearted air was really making its home on the both of them. There were still so much that he has yet to learn about Jae, and he was excited to start. A part of him just wished to know things only he would be given the chance to hear. Similar to what he's told Jae about his past, talking about his adoptive mother, that was really random and came out of the blue, though it was fitting with the mood and origin of his cooking ability. But it was personal. It wasn't something you'd see him talking about nor hint, to anyone else. Simply because it shows his vulnerability. If he'd learnt something harsh from the environment he trudged through a time ago, it was that you never show others your weak spots.
Though, an exception for a certain dhampir that goes by the name Jaesung Moon, wouldn't hurt, right? Especially given the level of significance he held. It was surprising that Hanseol wasn't ready to tell the dhampir everything, already. “You know, if I didn't know better, with the way you talk and your eloquent wording, I would've never thought you were 22, Jae. And believe it, it's a good thing. You don't find people who speaks about this anymore. It's becoming a rarity, it's sad.” The solemn tone to his words made it clear that the celestial struggled with the new life he's made for himself, seeing as he had no one to share it with. What was the use of being so well off and living a stable existence, knowing it wouldn't matter at the end of the day?
“I only act like I know everything, Jae. If you poke deep enough, you'll find that it's easy to push every bricks down for me to fall. How easy it is to make me flustered, etc. But of course, I think you have a hand in for the first part, already.” he trailed, showing more of his vulnerability towards the dhampir. No idea why he was doing it, perhaps because he was tired of just holding to himself for long. Jae's questions that came by next also fitted into the context, surprisingly enough. The conversation was going steadily at a decent pace, making everything a lot more comfortable for the star. “I told you, we're not going anywhere. So, you have all the time in the world, Jae. Don't worry about it.” he assured lightly, offering the dhampir an encouraging smile. Maybe pouring it on to Jae wasn't a bad decision he's made. It seems that the male always had the words to bring comfort to the star.
Humming to himself, he really wished his mother would be proud of him. “I hope so. I really miss her.” he mumbled softly, implying just how lonely the star has been all his life. When Jae suddenly asked him a question, he stopped his movements and stared straight in front of him, his gaze falling onto the dhampir. Though, it felt like a question to not just him, but the latter, as well. Indeed, why him? Of all people, why did he come out to be so special in his life? He was sure, at this point, it wasn't the matter of him being so desperate for a friend that he was willing to pick anyone. Hanseol is a meticulous person, who would always make sure everything was perfectly planned out. He wouldn't settle for just anyone. Something about the Jaesung Moon was special and entrancing to him. “You're right. I don't prefer it. I'd be lying if I said I preferred solitary confinement over everything else. Maybe it's something I tell myself day by day, hoping I'd get used to the idea of it. But at the end of the day, if I asked myself that, I would never ever able to say yes.” Jae pointed a cord that's been strained for too long, and it was time for Hanseol to pluck it.
“Living your life alone.. It gets lonely and tedious after a while. That can't be healthy. Especially when you finally came to a point where you tell yourself that living that way is for the best, or that it just is for you.” he murmured, biting his bottom lip before he clicked his tongue, going back into his deep thoughts. “At first, you were a friend I wanted. A companion to accompany my dull life. It turned to be something more, but I didn't find it surprising nor shocking. Maybe a part of me has always known that I wished for something more. 문재성, 특이한 케이스십니다. 아무리 노력해도 알아들을 수 없고, 지금까지도 잘 읽는 사람이었습니다. (You're a peculiar case, Moon Jaesung. I can't figure you out no matter how hard I try, and I've been a good reader so far.) Though it's safe for me to say that it's not just me trying to figure you out, it's more than that. We're so similar yet so different to each other, but we've molded well so far. Surely, that means something. You bring out the best in me, you were able to knock the fear off me bit by bit-- something I can't even do, myself.” he smiled.
“I don't know why it's you. But I know I wouldn't have wished for anyone else.” he grinned childishly before grabbing the plates and went to do the dishes.
Every time the nerves bubbled up inside him the dhampir found himself panicking a little, he didn’t even know what there was to worry over really, fear of the unknown he supposed. Jae had always had this irrational fear of things he didn’t know for sure and something like a relationship, you could never know for sure. Because a relationship involved another person and people could be unpredictable. Hanseol was about as unpredictable as they came, every time that Jae expected him to say or do one thing he seemed to do something else entirely. But Jae also found himself liking that, liking the mystery that came from knowing the fallen star and the way it made his heart race and his head spin. Jae liked being around someone that challenged him, made him feel passionate and important. He liked the feeling enough to take a risk on it, that’s why he had come tonight, there was only one way they were going to figure out what this thing between them was and where it might lead.
And many aspects of his life had changed since he started falling for the celestial, from the style of his writing, which had shifted from the topic of his struggles to the ideas of having feelings for someone else to the way that it was always Hanseol’s face that came into his mind in the moments before he fell asleep at night. Jae wasn’t used to having one person be such a prominent presence in his life and he was sure after tonight that would only grow deeper. Like when he saw a bag of flour in the cupboard and he would be reminded of their antics or how he would miss the judging looks of the two dogs that seemed to also be a part of his life now. There was no denying at this point that his feelings for Hanseol were teetering on the point of no return, that line he walked before he jumped feet first and Jae found himself wanting to jump, his fears of the unknown slowly being replaced by a curiosity of what could be ahead. He wanted this, he wanted it more than he knew how to express.
Jae chuckled softly as the two of them spoke about mind reading, of course, he didn’t really think that was what happened, Jae knew he was quite easy to read, mind reading wasn’t necessary to tell what he was thinking or feeling most of the time “I guess we must just be on the same wavelength then” he commented with a half smile, he was glad to hear the other male say he respected privacy too, though he supposed most people did, at least they did back home in Seoul anyway. Jae raised his brows as Hanseol called him out for revealing that he had a blog, the blue-haired male gave a half smile “I will take the URL to my grave” he teased with a chuckle, after all, it didn’t matter if someone knew he had a blog as long as they didn’t know the name of it or how to find it. Perhaps one day he would be brave enough to share it with someone that knew him, but that blog was somewhat of a journal of his life and that made it very personal and very revealing, especially on some of the darker thoughts the dhampir had on life and loneliness.
Jae gave Hanseol a dumbfounded look when he spoke about not calling himself an idiot, he raised a hand up “You literally just…” he trailed off with a confused look, did the celestial really talk so much that he forgot his own words right after he said them. Jae shook his head, it actually seemed like a very Hanseol thing to do so he let it go. He enjoyed this light demeanour surrounding them both though, he never laughed this much around others than he did with Hanseol, there was something addictive about the other male’s smile and laugh, when you saw it, you couldn’t help but want to emulate it, though there was no real emulating that perfect curve of the celestial’s lips which Jae couldn’t take his eyes off of. Jae found everything about the other male just purely stunning,, not just in the way he looked but in the way he moved and spoke. The way his eyes showed glints of vulnerability at times but also were often filled with a confidence that was breathtakingly sexy.
Jae was often caught between two personas that he had, to a lot of people he came across as childish, because he was goofy and silly, he liked making jokes and doing things to make other people smile, it was how he dealt with difficult things, by smiling and making fun out of it but that didn’t mean there wasn’t a deeper side to him. If you got Jae talking about the right subjects with the right people you would realize that he was quite an insightful person who had strong morals and opinions, many of which differed from Korean societal norms. It made him happy that Hanseol picked up on that side of him, one that nearly everyone else close to him glossed over, even his closest friends “Thank you” he spoke sincerely “Nearly everyone I know still treats me like I’m a child who can’t have his own thoughts or opinions so…” he cleared his throat “It means a lot to be able to talk like this” and he meant that, sure he was still young but Jae was an adult now and he liked being treated like one. He also liked to hear the deeper feelings and opinions the fallen star had and compare how they aligned with his own.
Jae really felt a connection with this side of Hanseol, he could tell it was a part that the other male, for the most part, kept locked away, the way his eyes showed the level of trust he was placing in Jae as he spoke, it was a little scary, seeing the rawness and vulnerability in the doe-eyed male but it only further affirmed the reasons the dhampir admired him “I know that” Jae nodded slightly and he did, he had seen those small moments where Hanseol had been caught off guard for himself, they were rare and precious, but he had seen them. Jae, however, was much easier to send over the edge “Sometimes I just feel like I’m constantly tripping over myself when it comes to you” he chuckled a little shyly, the dhampir wasn’t quite so direct as the celestial was. He appreciated the way that Hanseol just accepted his ask for patience like it was no big deal, he would give the fallen star his due, he was more understanding than most people Jae had ever met, he looked up at Hanseol with an adoring smile on his lips, just when he thought his feelings couldn’t run deeper for the male he said things like that “One day” he spoke softly, a boyish pure smile on his lips as his gaze remained on Han.
His heart ached just a little as he heard the star admit that he missed his mother, Jae reached his arm over the table to gently touch Hanseol’s wrist to show his support, Jae was lucky enough to still have both his parents but he realized that Han had no one left when it came to family which made him sad. He met the other male’s dark hues as they continued to talk and Jae slowly pulled his hand away from the celestial. Jae was almost surprised by the question he posed to Hanseol, the words rolling off his tongue without a thought about just how hard it would be to answer. There was no simple way to describe feelings after all. But Hanseol did attempt to answer it.
Jae leaned forward in his chair a little as he listened thoughtfully to what the fallen star had to say, he was holding his breath as he listened to the words, taking them in piece by piece and putting together a picture. The dhampir felt sad as he heard the way Han described his forced loneliness, how he had told himself that it was better to be alone. He felt for him, thinking about the times he must have wanted to have just someone, anyone to talk to and yet continued to be alone. Jae didn’t even know how he’d managed to survive so long that way, it was so difficult to even fathom. And then the dark-haired male turned the topic on Jae himself and the dhampir felt chills run through his entire body, his eyes taking in the little expressions that Hanseol made, the nervous bite of his lip before he spoke and the sincere expression on his face as he spoke. The moment Hanseol switched to Korean a soft but meaningful smile appeared on Jae’s lips, Han had such a beautiful voice when he spoke his native tongue, Jae could listen to it forever, especially when he spoke words like that. Jae pressed a hand against his chest where he could feel his own heartbeat racing “I’ve never felt this way about anyone” Jae admitted as he looked back at the fallen star sinking his teeth into his bottom lip.
And then the serious moment faded as Hanseol got up from the table to clear the dishes. Jae quickly raised to his feet grabbing some of the plates of his own before drawing on his supernatural speed to get there faster than the celestial “No you don’t” he insisted as he set down the plates he was holding next to the sink and then held his hand out expectantly for the ones Hanseol was holding “You did pretty much all the cooking, let me at least do the cleaning” he spoke again not backing down on this one as he turned towards the sink and started running the water, Jae definitely believed in equal effort when it came to relationships with others, he hated feeling like someone else was doing more than him.