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DhampirPermalink Reply by ✓ Jaesung Moon on August 12, 2019 at 21:58

Jae was a mix of emotions, a part of him was really happy where he was and with the life he had found in Evermore, he liked the freedom he had here and the way that people had come into his life. It wasn’t just Han he had met, it was Daehyun, someone who had become a really close friend and confidant for him and Donovan, someone who was teaching Jae to embrace his dhampir side in a way that made sense to the young male. The dhampir community here was open and accepting, they let him use the training space whenever he wanted, he had plenty of people to spar with and practice with. He felt stronger. He got along with his classmates, well most of them anyway and that made his classes fun and interesting. But the other part of him really did miss home and his family, they had been all Jae really had when he left Seoul and he did feel like he was neglecting them. He certainly tried to steer clear of his parents because he already knew the score, they wanted him to come running home, defeated by his ‘phase’ and marry some girl they picked out for him, just like they had now done to Eun.

Still, he was mad at himself for not getting on the first plane home when he found out what happened to his mother, he had been worried sick and stayed up half the night, in the end, he had ended up at Hanseol’s house and the celestial had comforted him when he needed it most. That was when Jae realized quite how deep his feelings for Han ran, it wasn’t just a friendship anymore for him, it was someone he found himself having a deep and comforting connection with that he wanted to hold onto with everything he had. But Eun’s words.they stung a little to the point that Jae winced just considering it “No” he responded without hesitation “Father quite literally told me he’d wait for me to come crawling back” he spoke as he kept his eyes trained into his lip, Eun was right, there was nothing that Jae could actually do to make their mother feel better, that was much more in his brother Hyunsik’s domain. He lifted his gaze and sighed as he looked back at Eun “It’s not a phase I’m going to get over Eun, writing is my passion, it’s all I want to do and Han” he paused for a moment “He means the world to me” he admitted with a slight nod of his head, going home would mean risking those two things, two things that he wasn’t sure he could do without now.

He knew Eun was making things out to be better than they were, that was what his brother always did, protected him. When he was younger he would have been fooled by it and just believed him blindly but now Jae understood things much better, he saw how much his brother suffered in the name of being the perfect son so that he and his siblings got to lead the lives they wanted to. It wasn’t in vain and it wasn’t something Jae took lightly either. His advice was well-founded but Jae couldn’t help but see the irony in it because his brother always gave advice he knew he would never take himself “The thing is Eun, I don’t even know who the true me is, all I know is the picture mother and father painted for me” he nodded solemnly “But the longer I stay here the more I feel like I’m finding him, the person I really am” and he was very different than the person he was back in Korea, not in a bad way. He nudged gently against Eun’s side when he said he was glad to have him too “Yeah he’s a vet and I swear he loves animals more than sweets which is saying something because I swear Han could eat a whole bakery worth of sweets if you let him” he laughed softly completely lighting up as he talked about his boyfriend.

Jae could definitely understand the place his brother was in right now, he could tell quite obviously that this wasn’t what he wanted for himself but Jae also knew what it was like to face up to their parents. Hell, he hadn’t managed to come up with the courage to do so yet and he was supposed to be the rebellious and out of control one “I get it” he spoke and nodded his head slightly “God knows I get it Eun, I know our parents” his gaze showed concern though, their mother wasn’t going to live forever, true but Eun very well could and he didn’t want his brother to spend majority of his time miserable. He swallowed hard when Eun asked him if he would come to the wedding, he only hesitated for a second before speaking “Of course I will, who else is going to tell all the embarrassing stories about you” he was doing what he usually did best and trying to lighten the situation a little. He pressed his lips together seeing the way his brother was hurting, was hurting him too, he reached out to rub his back gently “Well you’re not going to have to go through it alone and I’ll be here, when you want to rant about how life is unfair” he nodded sternly “Or if you decide you can’t do it, I’ll always be here” he meant that, he would never turn his back on his elder brother.

The question of love though, that was a hard line for Jae to tread, somehow Jae had managed to find it in a place he never expected to find it, it wasn’t like he came to America with the goal of falling in love, that just happened because he met someone who honestly, lit up his entire life “Love is that moment when you look at someone and you realize they’re brighter than any light you see in the room” he spoke softly and nodded his head “I really hope you get to experience it one day” he meant that, if he married a human girl then maybe this wasn’t his only shot and he could find love later in his life, once he was able to slip their father’s expectant grasp.

DhampirPermalink Reply by ✓ Sangeun Moon on August 25, 2019 at 17:26

The purpose of visiting his brother today was all because he wanted to cheer both themselves in a way. But now that he’s here, all he could do is contemplate how far his life would go on to be, was he ready for this? Was he ready to trudge the path to marriage? An arranged one above all? He sighed heavily upon hearing the response from Jae, of course, their father would say that. He’s always been that harsh with his truths. Keywords; his truths. Not anyone else’s. “You know how he is, Jae, he’s not going to praise you or compliment you on your achievements, he’s always going to reprimand you how your life would be one filled with plenty of misery just because it’s not the life he wanted for you. He has good intentions, only wanting the best for his children but his priorities are clearly misplaced so don’t worry too much on it. You’ll prove him wrong, I’m sure of it." 

The hand on his shoulder obviously stated that he was going to be there with him through everything else, what’s important is that he’ll be there for him even when nobody else would, “Prove him wrong, brother. Prove him wrong and don’t crawl back… Live your life to the fullest here, build a life with your boyfriend and achieve your dreams.” He had to admit, hearing Jae rave about his boyfriend had him surround his heart with envy, he wanted what Jae had too. He wanted to feel what he felt. “He sounds like a guy, I hope you’re happy with him, Jae.” That made Eun wonder if he’ll ever have that one day, more importantly, would he ever have that with Kim Ahreum? How would his life be like? There were so many possibilities, endless. The picture their parents painted for them was clear and bright as the day, they told them what they want them to turn out as and how that’ll influence everything, and unfortunately, he had been the first victim of it. 

Seeing the same treatment fell on his brothers and sister, it tugged on Eun’s guilty conscience. He should’ve been there to protect them. “I was so busy in law school and didn’t even come back to visit as frequently as I used to back in uni, sorry for that. We only had the means of FaceTiming as our medium to communicate too, and that should not be the norm, at all” he shook his head in dismay, it was one of those choices that made him feel immensely guilty. “Then stay” he exclaimed, “If that’s what you want and if that’s what you think will get you closer to finding yourself, stay. No one would force you to come back, certainly not me when I know you’d be a lot happier here.” Throwing his head back as he pushed himself down on the couch, he let out a groan of a complaint, “God now I want to have a boyfriend… well, girlfriend… ugh, whatever.” 

Knowing that at least he’ll have Jae at his wedding gave him enough relief, it wasn’t everything but it was something. And Eun knew better than to just reject anything at all. “I wasn’t aware I had any embarrassing moments to even tell others” he quirked his eyebrows up as he scoffed at Jae, “Were you planning on making stuff up about me? Excuse you, I am purrfect.” The way Jae had described what love is to him, made Eun gape in awe, truly his brother is one of a kind and the thought of him being happy with his significant other made the elder Moon’s heart flutter with pride and happiness. He was about to say something about it but then his stomach grumbled, sounding out its complaint since the owner would not feed it properly, prompting Eun to grumble into the pillow, “I need food. Come on, you’re not occupied by anyone and the least you could do is bring me somewhere that offers good food around here” he got up and patted Jae teasingly, “Up you go, take me to food.”

DhampirPermalink Reply by ✓ Jaesung Moon on August 26, 2019 at 9:39

What Eun said about their father was fully and completely true, he would never be good enough in the eyes of his father and the more time he distanced himself from his family and the place he grew up the more that realization hit home “And yet there’s still some dumb part of me that cares what he thinks” he commented with a solemn shrug of his shoulders, he didn’t know how to stop feeling like that or fight it. It was a natural thing, to want to be good in the eyes of the people who raised you, to make them proud. “But the truth is I don’t think I could impress him even if I tried” because he was always going to be second to his siblings, he wasn’t Science smart like Hyunsik and Ahri were after all. It was frustrating as hell, not being able to ever meet these stupid standards he set for himself.

He rubbed his thumb softly against Eun’s shoulder before he slowly pulled his hand away, a part of him wondered if maybe Eun wanted to see him completely cut those ties just to prove it could be done, that he could make a life for himself without his family name, that he could be happy in spite of everything he was going to lose the moment he made that choice “You make it sound easy” he commented when Eun mentioned proving their father wrong, definitely not an easy feat, he needed to be able to stand on his own two feet and while leaning on Han might get him some of the way there, he hated the idea of being completely dependent on him. “I am happy” he responded honestly and shrugged “But he’s also not the solution to all my problems, there are things I’ve got to figure out before I can” he didn’t know how to say the words “Before I can cut that rope” because that’s what he was expecting to happen and he was sure his brother would understand why.

The look in Eun’s eyes he recognized well because it was an emotion he felt often when it came to thinking about his family, guilt. “Hey don’t blame yourself” he spoke sternly and shook his head “You were holding up the weight of the world for us” he always saw the toll it took on his brother, Jae didn’t know how else to help so he always made stupid jokes to make Eun laugh and even resorted to pulling funny faces if that failed. He made sure to be the one who called Eun regularly on facetime and always told him he was proud of him “And I’m okay Eun, hell I’m better than okay, I’m finally happy, I finally feel like I have direction” and he wouldn’t have had that freedom if it wasn’t for the elder dhampir. He chuckled softly and nodded his head at the way Eun stumbled over the things he wanted “I mean technically you have a girlfriend, or a fiancee anyway” he spoke softly and shrugged “Is she a good person at least?” Jae knew of the family but he’d never met any of them in person and none of the kids were his age so he never played with them as a child.

Jae gave him a questioning look “Clearly you’ve forgotten that day when you decided to try and climb the walls of the house in a cape to cheer me up” he spoke and tilted his head to the side a little, now his elder brother definitely had more ammo to use on him than vice versa but Jae had noticed a lot about Eun as a child because he was the person he idolized. That day Jae had been crying about getting yelled at by their father and sent to his room but Eun, knowing how much Jae loved superheroes had come to rescue him, but underestimated how easy it was to climb the house walls. He was busy chuckling at the memory when he hard Eun’s stomach rumble and raised a questioning brow “I forgot to ask where you’re staying” he spoke as he let the elder dhampir pull him to his feet “Lucky for you I know the place that does the best shrimp in Evermore and we both know how much you love shrimp” he chuckled and grabbed his keys and wallet before leading the way to the entrance hall “Pretty sure you scared Han away, he couldn’t handle both of us being in the same room” he teased as he tucked his hands into his pocket and started leading the way out of the building.

DhampirPermalink Reply by ✓ Sangeun Moon on August 29, 2019 at 18:47

Unfortunately the world they live in doesn't encourage people to dream more than they promote competition. At least for Eun, that was how he viewed things from a young age. He couldn't remember the last time his father showed him a genuine smile and applauded him for his accolades and treat him out. What child wouldn't want their father to do that? What child wouldn't want to impress their parents and hope for those compliments to fly out from their mouths? Especially ones that had been raised in a strict household such as them? The last time they went out together was whenever they had an annual family dinner and even then, everyone was literal emotionless robots answering whatever their father deemed appropriate enough. He could see the reaction off every one of his siblings' faces whenever their father asked questions they knew they had to answer but couldn't. "We all care about what he thinks, Jae. Even I do, why do you think I'm following every single plan he has laid out for me? And this arranged marriage?"

 He pressed his lips into a thin line and sighed softly, he didn't want to sound so pressed about it but it just came out of him, sometimes he always had it in him that was pounding so hard to get out. "I want to appease him because he's our father... But I did all of that so you would be able to live your ideal life without any constraints." Shaking his head at his baby brother, Eun disliked the way he always disregarded himself, he believed Jae's worth is even more than his because Jae had more beliefs to what he's capable of, "You can be second but you know you are the first for plenty of people, me for instance, your boyfriend, Han?" Chuckling to himself tenderly, he rubbed his shoulders soothingly, "I try to make it sound easier than it actually is to assure myself most of the time," It was the truth. Sometimes you could speak to the existence and perhaps with enough effort and determination, it'll grant your wishes. Admittedly, Eun didn't like the idea of being dependent on anyone or anything, hence why he kept striving up his ranks diligently. Why?

So he can finally move out of the family home and settle in somewhere of his own, somewhere peaceful enough to give his head a serene outlook for once in his stressful tiring life. He felt like he forgot to tell Jae something more about what he's been doing for the past few months since his departure here in America but kept it to himself as he pondered aimlessly trying to rack his head for that particular piece of information. "Don't fret yourself too much about cutting the rope, Jae. Take your time, you still have a while before you finish your degree no? Perhaps once you've graduated. Don't grow up too fast, dude" he grumbled teasingly and ruffled his dark locks in a playful manner, it felt like it was almost yesterday since he saw a younger Jae. "It's okay not to have a dream, it's possible to just be happy and enjoy your life to the fullest. Don't let anyone tell you what to do. Yes, not even your 'precious and lovable' boyfriend. If someone loves you, they'll want you to be better for your own self rather than for their own personal selfish gain." 

He kept telling himself all these advice would work better on others than himself because that was his reality. It's okay, it is his duty to help others, right? When the latter asked him regarding Ahreum, Eun spared him a small smile, albeit a genuine one, "Yeah, she's a good girl, she's actually Ahri's age. Bur a very mature woman no doubt. Headstrong. Fierce. But also warm and caring. Seems like someone maternal, she never bugs me or get too clingy. If we weren't getting married, she'd be a good friend. But I suppose that's what I see us now, as friends." Somehow it left him a bitter taste in his mouth. Friends. How he desperately wished he wasn't forced into something so important in a drastic way. The story about him trying to cheer Jae up surprisingly cheered him up as well so he was thankful for the efforts of his brother poured in. "Oh I'm staying at the Regency Hotel in the city centre. My firm paid monthly, I'm supposed to be here for only a month or two, depending on how fast I can crack this case and win so I can go home."

 Ouch. Home. His eyes lit up at the idea of food, especially shrimp, knowing the elder Moon always got himself in a famished mood around food generally, he trailed after his younger brother with soft steps. "I didn't mean to scare him, okay, it's not my fault I'm blinding him with my beauty."

DhampirPermalink Reply by ✓ Jaesung Moon on September 1, 2019 at 15:12

Jae nodded slightly, it was a real dilemma because he didn't want to resent his father, he wasn't an evil man, he didn't hit his children or anything like you might read in the horror news stories but his father was a very strict and expectant man and he was very intolerant of anything considered traditional for bringing honor to the family. He certainly didn't like the fact that Jae wanted to go into writing, he wanted control over their love lives because it was a bargaining chip to gain reputation for the family. "Yeah I know" he spoke in a weak voice and shrugged a little "Sometimes I just wish I didn't care...things might be easier then" he sighed as he looked over at Eun, his brother definitely had the worse end of the deal and Jae had no idea how he could even entertain the idea of it "An arranged marriage in the 21st century, who would have thought" he grumbled still thinking it was a really bad idea.

Hearing his brother say out loud that he did what he did to shield himself and their other siblings from their father's expectations made Jae both happy and sad, Eun was always looking out for him and making sure he was happy but he hated knowing it was at the cost of his own, that was incredibly frustrating for the younger dhampir "You know you don't have to do that right? I think we both know one day father and I are going to come to blows" there was only so long he was gonna let Jae stay in Evermore and live this life before he started making demands about coming home. He blushed slightly when Eun brought up Han and ducked his head slightly with a shy smile "Yeah he just kinda came from nowhere and for some reason chose me" he was so happy that he did, his boyfriend truly was the light in his life and that wasn't even him just being ironic because he's also a star "I know things can't be easy" he spoke sympathetically "but you should know I think you're pretty amazing" he spoke and nodded his head, even if no one else noticed, he saw how diligently Eun handled the world.

He laughed when Eun told him not to grow up too fast, sometimes he forgot that he was still only 22 and figuring out the world, probably a side effect of moving halfway across the world to start a new life he supposed but he actually enjoyed figuring things out for himself "You know adapting to living away from home is hard" he teased trying to lighten the situation a little "the first time I did laundry I put the detergent in the wrong place and then it started to bubble everywhere and made a real mess" then again, Jae was clumsy and that kind of thing happened to him so often that he came to expect it nowadays. He smiled gently at his brother's advice and nudged him "You should take your own advise sometimes" he teased with a laugh knowing Eun probably wouldn't, he understood why but he kinda hated that was their reality "Han doesn't ask me to change anything about myself" he spoke softly in awe "If anything he probably believes in me more than I do" which was such a blessing to have in his life, someone to cheer him on and vent to and generally just be there for him "though you've always been good at cheering me on too" he'd never downplay the importance of his brother's support.

Hearing Eun talk about his fiance was interesting, he was generally very positive and sweet about her, praising the person she was and it was clear he didn't resent her for the situation both of them were in. The way Eun said friends made it so evident to him that he had no interest in her beyond that though and it made Jae sad knowing that and yet knowing he would go through with this loveless marriage anyway. His gaze wavered a little but he did his best to keep his words positive and supportive "and what about her? Do you think she has feelings for you?" Perhaps it would be easier overall if neither of them actually loved one another, maybe then they could find a way to coexist without any of the unrequited bitterness that might come with it. "A month or two" he spoke softly and smiled gently at the idea of having his brother in the city for a little while "We'll have to make some plans when you aren't busy with the case" he nodded firmly and smiled "maybe you, me and Han could go to dinner and you two could get to know each other" he liked the idea of that, since they were probably the two most important people in his life right now.

Seeing Eun completely change demeanor at the mention of food he laughed and headed out of the apartment leading the way through the building, he was actually impressed Eun managed to find his place if he was honest "He's a little shy sometimes" he explained as he rolled his eyes at the comment and then stepped out onto the streets of Evermore "alright new rule for dinner, no talking about father or the wedding, only everything and anything else" they could use a break from the heavy and just catch up on one another's life "so you have an American client?" He asked curiously wanting to know more about this case that brought Eun to Evermore.

DhampirPermalink Reply by ✓ Sangeun Moon on September 8, 2019 at 18:12

At this moment, Eun wasn't sure what he was doing. Was it wise for him to talk about this? Yes of course… it would be extremely unhealthy for him if he chose to keep all of that frustrations pent up inside him. His shoulders may be broad and his build may be bigger than his brothers but it does not mean the physical state can withhold his problems that stemmed from his doubts. But at the same time, he doesn't wish to worry the people around him, especially Jae, god knows the latter did not need to hear more problems involving his own family. Marriage was a sore topic but nevertheless, it's currently the hottest topic their family is on. "You tell yourself you don't care but it's hard, isn't it? When you also know, at the end of the day, you'd care about it either way" he murmured softly, it feels like that's the reality of things for them but Eun was relieved that Jae still held that sentiment to him, it meant his brother is still that good guy he knows and loves. Not that he ever doubted he'd change in the first place but paranoia can eat you up when you least expect it. 

The idea of an arranged marriage in the 21st century does sound absurd, even he had to admit it no matter how catering he can be to their parents, "Don't I know it… you know I actually said the same thing to them. Guess what's their answer?" he cleared his throat and tried to mimic their father's voice, "Sangeun you are sounding so liberal right now. Please know how to differentiate between work and personal" the impersonation was spot on, which made him remember the many times has he impersonated their father for fun in front of Jae even since they were children. When Jae told him he didn't have to do all the things he's been sacrificing since the beginning, the elder Moon spared a saddened smile as to reassure him he's fine but did not hide how upset he had been due to all of the repercussions he suffered after that, "It's fine. It's what big brothers do, Jae. It's what I'd do to ensure your future will steer clear from all the whispers and stay bright." Truthfully, Eun was glad Jae decided to further his studies outside of Korea, outside of the ridiculously conservative and traditional family of theirs as well as their closed-minded community that only knew how to condemn but never accept. 

"Just because we know you and father would argue, doesn't mean we can just leave for that to happen. Perhaps the future in uncertain, Jae. But all I know is I should make the best of the current while I still can" he felt like he heard a whole group of crickets in his head after that statement, "Right… god that sounded awkward as hell when I'm doing our father's bidding without hesitating" his gaze was fixated on the ground as he fiddled with his fingers awkwardly. When they talked about Han, he could see the way his brother's face lit up in happiness, he couldn't imagine how happy he must've been, "As he should… you undermine yourself too much, brother. Han can see that about you. I'm guessing it doesn't take much for him to fall for you, I mean… golden heart, good physique… handsome face, albeit not as handsome as mine but… still you're a Moon. Our father may be a grade A pain and our mother may be quite fussy but god their genetics are class S" he whistled playfully, no point in dealing with a somber mode anyway. He came here to enjoy his time with his brother.

 "I know I am pretty amazing, took you long enough...everyone else wanted me to be their hyung but my own dongsaeng can't even appreciate his actual hyung here" he stuck his tongue out teasingly and huffed, "You should be grateful you have an awesome brother like this." Eun did, however, slap his brother's shoulder when Jae disclosed the fact that he misplaced the detergent while doing his laundry for the first time, "Dude! There's a literal manual that tells you where to- I am not going home until I'm sure you won't accidentally burn yourself while cooking or ironing-" he paused and narrowed his eyes at him scrutinizingly, "Wait… have you burned yourself?" There it is again, the talk about how Jae's boyfriend accepted him, he didn't need to be a love guru to notice that look in his eyes that's dripping with honey, "Don't make me jealous" he whined and threw a pillow at him. Did Ahreum had feelings for him? 

That's what actually made him feel bad in the first place, his lips quivered slightly and tried not to avert his gaze away, "I feel guilty. She deserved better than some guy who doesn't even know what love is. Unrequited love hurts… having a crush is fine but when you're marrying them, that's a whole different thing. Ahreum's that girl I told you about," he mumbled, a few years ago Eun told Jae about the girl working as an intern secretary at the company he was handling the case on, the one who always offered him coffee and accompanied him when he needed company. "How does one still like the same person even after 4 years?" He does have plenty to do with this case but how could he say no to Jae? "You know I'd come running when there's food so... " When he suggested a dinner where he could also get to know Han, he nodded softly in affirmation, "so long as there's food."

Upon hearing that the latter was shy, he laughed, "Yeah everyone can see that, Jae. He's cute." Yes, that rule was something he could follow through with. "Yeah. Apparently he got some murder accusation on a cold case a year ago? I have yet to meet him so I don't know for sure if he's innocent or guilty… let's hope not the latter" Eun always hated defending the wrong. But that's his job right there. All he could do is make sure to lessen their punishment and not fully free. They deserved that. "How's your studies? What's Han's major?" His eyes never left the pavement though as he peeked out here and there, "And... How far is this shrimp place, I'm hungry..."

DhampirPermalink Reply by ✓ Jaesung Moon on September 10, 2019 at 14:18

Jae nodded softly at Eun’s words, he had always struggled with that curse their parents put upon them, it was a hyper-awareness of what everyone thought, it started with his parents but it went further than that, it was his grandparents before they passed, it was his peers at school, it was his parent’s friends who they always bragged about their children to. It was ingrained into them so young and it wasn’t something you easily managed to shake. “The longer I stay here the easier it gets though, things are much more...liberal here” he nodded his head, he really wished Eun could stay longer to see it for himself because it had been incredibly liberating for Jae and he wanted to be able to share that with him.

Jae felt guilty for doing do but he laughed at Eun’s impression of their father because it was a spot-on English translation of what he sounded like and it both frustrated and amused the younger dhampir at the same time. “Because your marriage is only that to him, a work transaction which gets him the reputation and money he wants” he grimaced slightly as he glanced up at Eun “Your happiness is worth more than any monetary amount” he wanted Eun to know he thought that, it didn’t matter how much money you had, it could never be replaced for true happiness, hell Jae barely had a penny to his name and he was happier than he even knew how to put into words. “You shouldn’t have to give up anything for me” he spoke the words softly as he looked at Eun, it wasn’t fair that this was the deal his brother had to give himself, truly none of it was fair to him, he just wanted the chance for both of them to be happy.

“I still can’t pretend like that’s not going to happen Eun, I have to be ready for that possibility because I have a life I have to figure out” there was only so long he could live in this hopeful bubble that everything would work out before he would realize the reality of the family he had been born into. Seeing what was happening to Eun now was only a reminder of how intolerant his father could be. Jae laughed gently at the way Eun described him, especially the part where he showed his slightly narcissistic tendencies “Well true, they did manage to do something pretty right” he reached up and squeezed Eun’s shoulder a little “I mean Hyunsik is a pretty great brother you know, they really did right with him” he teased purposely bringing up their brother rather than Eun as a joke because the two of them had always been the closest of the Moon siblings.

Jae rolled his eyes as Eun talked about himself, it definitely was one of his favorite topics and while the younger male loved his brother to the moon and back, he could get pretty annoying at times too “Are you sure she wants to marry you? I mean I’m not sure how anyone could put up with your self absorbed self for longer than a few hours” he smirked and teased looking back at him before nudging against his side when he told him off for screwing up the laundry “Do I strike you as the type to read the manual?” he raised his brows, he might fuck it up a lot but he learned by doing things, screwing them up and then fixing it next time. That was who he was. When Eun asked if he burned himself Jae blushed and gave him a sheepish grin “Probably best we don’t start getting into my general living failures” he sighed dramatically, he was sure his clumsiness balanced out some other part of his personality.

Jae listened as Eun talked about his fiancee, her name was pretty similar to their sister’s so he was confused for a moment at first but now he was on the same page. It made him sad, knowing this girl was pining after his brother who felt nothing for her in return, it must be incredibly painful for the both of them, her knowing she would be married to man who didn’t love her and him because he couldn’t make himself feel something for her “I mean you did just list a whole bunch of reasons why you’re amazing so” he poked his tongue out at him and smirked before softening his eyes “Does she know? Have you...talked to her about all this?” knowing their father, he probably had them watched all the time so they couldn’t have a real private conversation.

Jae laughed softly when Eun pointed out that Han was cute, to the dhampir he really was, he enjoyed being around him and seeing him move between bashful to confident in the blink of an eye. Listening to Eun’s case had the younger dhampir raising his brow though “And they couldn’t bring in an American attorney?” he quickly realized how that could be taken and parted his lips “Not that I’m complaining you’re here or anything, I’m just curious, did they request you specifically?” he was interested he supposed, Eun’s work had always been fascinating to him.

Just as they reached the restaurant he pointed to the door and then opened it up for his brother before following him inside, the woman greeted them with a bow which he returned and then led them to a table for two at the back. He waited for Eun to sit before seating himself opposite him and answering his question “Classes are good, I enjoy the practical ones more than the history lessons but” he shrugged “All part of the plan” he grinned slightly scanning his eyes over the menu “Han isn’t a student though, he works as a vet” he spoke it quietly because he knew the other male looked much younger than he was.

DhampirPermalink Reply by ✓ Sangeun Moon on September 28, 2019 at 9:10

Eun knew if there was anyone that understood his pain from all the constant glam-litting life that made him shoulder all the pressure and burden given by his own parents, it would be his youngest brother. Jae always knew what goes on his head and perhaps that was why he was the closest to the eldest Moon, because they had some similarities that tie them together. Jae could relate Eun’s hardships and sometimes it wasn’t just pity he wanted, it was closure? Even the dhampir had no idea what he wanted but at the moment? He was fine with this. Whatever this is. “Really? I mean, I heard that America could be quite… you know” he made a hand gesture before saying that word, “Liberal. But are you comfortable with it? Though I’m guessing it probably suits you better compared to Korea. There are not many rules here that would keep you tied down to something you don’t want.” And boy was he relieved to hear that his brother was walking a line to a better life here. At least, Jae found his happiness here. 

Jae wasn’t the only one who winced when he said their father thought of his marriage to be a mortgage; something to trade or sell. To own. “When you put it that way, it sounds hurtful” he murmured faintly and let out a heaved sigh, casting a rueful look to the other male, “It made me wonder if I don’t bring enough for the family too... But I don’t think it’s that. Mother and Father never said anything about it and you know how blunt Father can be with his words, if there was something that was simply not enough, he’d let them know. Reputation, though? That’s a high yes” Considering Kim Ahreum is a name almost everyone in the district knew for her lineage. A diamond cartel heiress, who wouldn’t want to marry into that kind of family? Their family was well-known and are actually living quite the luxurious life now but the opportunity to expand their influence is probably what their father is searching for, hence this marriage. 

“He said it’s for the better future but I’m not so sure about that anymore.” He shook his head and smiled gently, “Don’t worry, I’ll get through this. I always do, don’t I? I’ll… find a way to be happy, I suppose.” But why does it seem like he was convincing himself more than Jae? Pursing his lips lightly, he wasn’t sure what to tell Jae about his father’s disparage towards the younger one, “Grandma passed away about a month ago, I know she included you in her will. She loves us, she loves you the most.” He had a knowing tone, as if he was telling Jae that he still had a backup plan somewhere. “You know she’s the one in our family with actual fortune. Father didn’t even get half of what he thought he would get, unsurprisingly. She never really did like her son-in-law. Always told Mother off for marrying him” he chuckled, it was a never-ending argument between the two of them whenever they had a family gathering back when the siblings were still so young, “And I am sure you got quite the sum. I got it too but this isn’t about me, only, it’s about you, too.” 

A playful scowl came across his face as he scoffed at Jae for bringing up Hyunsik instead of him, “Well played, brother. Well played. It’s a shame I’m the one who gets all the love letters, though.” Two can play at the game. “Oh please, people love me. I’m everyone’s ideal son-in-law. Her mother loves me, her? Well, does packing me breakfast and lunch for the rest of the week last month count? Oh let’s not forget she got my name engraved in her Cartier.” Eun clicked his tongue as he chastised Jae for not reading the manual, “Anyone who don’t know the first thing about anything should be reading the instruction guide, yes. That’s what sensible people do, little brother” he rolled his eyes, he even threw him a dramatic eye roll when the latter mentioned no talking about his general living failures, “My my, how can anyone think you’re my brother? I mean, aside from the looks and body proportions.”

 The elder Moon pressed his lips together and shook his head slowly, it dawned on him that he didn’t let her know anything about his true feelings towards her, “No… I didn't. I probably should, right? She doesn’t deserve to go through this. I don’t want to put her in a loveless marriage, she’s a human. This might be the only marriage she gets in this lifetime” But then, what of his parents and hers? “Do you think she’ll be heartbroken if she knows?” He had such a timid air around him that definitely made Eun feel a lot smaller. When Jae asked him why they picked him instead of a regular American attorney, he shrugged casually, “No idea actually. All I know was that they contacted my firm asking for their best and it just so happens to be me for the past year. They said they were interested in my work accolades and wanted me to take it. I can’t exactly say no to any case thrown my way so… here I am” what was the case again? Ah, right, he was supposed to defend his client against their lawsuit. 

“It’s a lawsuit, though it was clear this guy has a lot of tax evasion faults in his well-hidden crimes. Bad news, definitely. But it seems that he’s a ‘newborn’ baby now from what I’ve heard. Probably wanted to atone to his mistakes but can’t afford to get a jail sentence.” He trailed behind his brother and took a seat as soon as they stepped inside, “Eh, history, and philosophy is a bore. I like the words but I don’t like putting it in the exam” he darted his eyes in amusement when Jae said Han wasn’t a student, “So you’re dating someone older? That’s weird...He definitely looks younger than me and you…” 

DhampirPermalink Reply by ✓ Jaesung Moon on September 29, 2019 at 10:57

Jae looked over at Eun and nodded slightly “It’s definitely very different from home, people see things differently here, the way you address people is different, in some ways people are less direct too” he found it strange how Americans could be quite choosy with their words in order to avoid offending someone while back home most people would just say what was on their mind “But I’ve always been different too” he spoke softly and nodded “So it works for me, I feel like I can be who I want to be without fear of letting people down here” the expression he pulled showed that he didn’t think that would be the case when they were back home.

“That’s because it is hurtful Eun, it’s your life, it’s how you spend the next 60 years or more of your time” he hoped his brother had thought about the seriousness of all of this because once he married her there really wasn’t going to be a way out, divorce would be extremely frowned upon by their father and possibly considered an even bigger disrespect to the family than refusing to get married in the first place. “Don’t talk like that, you literally did everything society expects of you, you went to law school and graduated with honors, one day you’re probably going to be experienced enough to be a DA if you wanted to” though Eun’s specialty is criminal defense. “I just find it hard to understand why reputation needs to come before happiness” surely a parent should want whatever was best for their child regardless of what it is? If he ever had a child he’d want them to know he’d love them regardless of what they chose to do with their life.

Jae wasn’t disrespectful to his father though, he knew he was a hardworking man who came from nothing and worked for his entire life in order to build something for his family, he saw parts of himself in that, in the way he wanted to do great things and be a great person in order to provide for Hanseol one day. But their father also very rarely smiled or did things because they would be fun or he enjoyed them, he was very straight-laced and harsh and telling his boys how they had to exceed and go beyond him. Jae went quiet when Eun mentioned their grandmother, he had been heartbroken when she passed away and even more so when he couldn’t afford a flight ticket home for the funeral. “Grandma always told me to chase my dreams” he spoke softly, it was her and Eun that had convinced him to go after the study in America over the Korean university his father picked for him. She was the matriarch of the family and very understanding compared to most “She always told me I was a rebel like her” he laughed but he was tearing up a little remembering it all “You’re right I should talk to the attorney, it just...it makes it real you know” he pressed his lips together a little sadly.

He chuckled softly at the way he teased his elder brother, Jae respected Eun greatly but they had always been quite casual and playful with each other, they weren’t just siblings, they were friends, often close friends who cared about one another’s well being and lives. “Damn, that sounds like it’s moving fast” he spoke it with slightly widened eyes as he looked back at his brother “You’re right though, you’re probably the most perfect son ever on paper, I wouldn’t be surprised if father made a list of your possible candidates” he rolled his eyes because he knew it was probably true, so many girls fawned over his brother and his good looks. “Yeah well I never claimed to be practically smart, I just figured how hard could it be” turns out? Pretty hard actually, he sighed heavily and shook his head slightly “Hey laugh all you want but I’m figuring this living alone stuff out slowly” he grinned a little.

Jae watched Eun’s reaction and sighed softly, well that was all kinds of complicated, if she really thought he was in love with her when she wasn’t it was only going to be so long until he found himself in a situation he didn’t know how to get himself out of and he might also end up breaking her heart. “I don’t know her Eun but if it was me I’d want to know so I can prepare my expectations of what life might be like” he shrugged slightly, his brother wasn’t exactly the best actor after all and there are certain things a wife would expect. “You know her better than I do, do you think she’d understand?” he supposed that depended on whose idea the wedding was. “Damn, sending you all the way out here though, they must have a lot of money” seemed bizarre if you asked him but Jae wasn’t complaining at the opportunity to have family with him in the city.

“Well I suppose it wouldn’t be a simple case if they needed to fly you over for it, how long do you think it’ll take to get through?” which was Jae’s way of casually asking Eun how long he might be staying in Evermore because the younger dhampir could really use him around. Looking up at Eun he shrugged slightly “Much like father looks like he’s been 35 for our entire lives you mean” he commented it nonchalantly, it seemed pretty normal for people to be immortal these days through he knew Eun was asking what Han was. They were interrupted by the waiter coming over to take their drinks orders though “I’ll take a Soju please” he commented and smiled over to Eun, once the order was taken he bit his tongue “Han is a celestial, he’s a fallen star” he revealed and waited for his brother’s reaction.

DhampirPermalink Reply by ✓ Sangeun Moon on October 18, 2019 at 17:38

"So that's why people would try to evade better than say then directly. I guess we're quite brutal when it comes to honesty, huh?" He noticed that despite their conservative community, Koreans have quite the loose tongue, it was as if everyone should already know how and what to react with whenever they were presented with a situation of the sorts. He was glad that Jae was happier here, it meant that leaving was a good choice for the latter and what kind of brother wouldn't want to see his brother happy? "I'm glad to hear you are not facing any trouble here… it's your choice to come and to see that there was nothing wrong with it, it assures me that you'll lead a better life here. Better than what you would lead back home." It's wasn't meant to be offensive, Eun knew Jae was different and doesn't suit their family's ways, and it actually made everything refreshing because if anything, he was the hope they needed.

 "You didn't have to put it that way... " he murmured timidly, his fingers fiddling with the helm of his shirt absentmindedly, with the way Jae phrased it, Eun has to rethink it back and those always brought him to an agonizing period. "Am I really left with a choice anyway" it sounds sad but wasn't that the reality of things? "I do want things to turn out differently while still leaving it to be people getting the same level of satisfaction, you know?" He wanted everyone to be happy. It feels wrong to know that he'd be happy but others would be frowning. It was understandable that their grandmother would like Jae, his youthful spirit could always bend others to like him, even if Hyunsik and Ahri doesn't admit it, they were suckers for Jaesung Moon too. The same way he is. "I think in a way, that's why Father was so hard on you. Because you're just like her and she didn't exactly like Father, did she?" he pointed out teasingly, the news of her passing broke them all. 

"Sooner or later, you need to go through it. Don't worry, Jae. She was proud of you, you made her proud. Think of that." Their grandmother doted on them, whenever Eun had time to go home from school, he would go straight to her first instead of their family home because he missed her. "Yeah, things are moving quite fast. I'm flattered, of course. By all the gestures but for someone who's never even had his first kiss much less date? Yeah, it's overwhelming." It was awkward for Eun, he had to read so many articles and books alike to act like the perfect one before everyone else. Thankfully, it wasn't as hard seeing as he was naturally friendly with everyone. "He actually did. Ahreum was the highest on the list. Perfect background, good upbringing, rich, pretty, kind." It sucks that he couldn't find the happiness behind all of that. Anyone else would be lucky to have her as wife. 

"Tell me, brother. Who's the one cooking for you then? Ugh please don't tell me you survive on instant noodles only because I will personally whip your ass into shape and force you to cook for me so you can learn." He had his hues narrowed onto the dhampir, his gaze unwavering as it was fixated on Jae. "You're right, I should tell her that. She told me she wanted to make it work the first time. I should tell her what I feel and all, it's only right, that way." As expected, the advice he received from Jae turned out to be the ones he needed. "She's understanding. I'm sure she would. But it would definitely break a woman's heart, wouldn't it? Especially when her family was the one who suggested this wedding." Surprisingly, it was her father that reached out to him first after he met him at a charity fundraiser. "I worked at a private firm, Jae, those guys have a lot of money on their hands, and we don't exactly have a lot of grade A criminals there. They had the opportunity, they recommended and the client wanted in so here I am."

 He was a bit skeptical to set foot in a foreign country with a language he wasn't even sure was understandable to others, though he was extremely grateful that he made sure to practice a lot back then with Jae. But knowing that Jae was in this city, he was more determined. When asked how long the case would keep him here, Eun shrugged casually, "It was supposed to be two to three months, but there was a problem with the lawsuit so it may be extended. Are you looking to kick your brother out already?" he gasped and feigned offense as he shook his head playfully at Jae. The question about immortality shouldn't be surprising, especially when you're a supernatural yourself. So when Jae literally implied to him that his boyfriend was a supernatural as well, he was a bit relieved because that wasn't acceptance between the two, the part about him being a Celestial, however? He was still comprehending that. He ordered beer alongside Soju and leaned forward with his eyes widened, "Wait, for real? A real fallen star? Like the stars in the sky? We have those? How does a star look like… That?"

DhampirPermalink Reply by ✓ Jaesung Moon on October 20, 2019 at 9:52

Jae nodded slightly in response to Eun’s comment about Koreans being direct “It’s sometimes a blessing and sometimes a curse” he gave a slight grin and shrugged “If you asked someone their age here too soon then they’d probably think you were rude” whereas in Korea people would ask all the time because you needed to address your elders more respectfully. “Well I’m not sure it’s completely trouble-free but I definitely feel more comfortable to live my life as I choose here” no parents reminding him constantly of the impression he was giving to their friends or always fawning over his three siblings and then barely even mentioning him. Here he could be important to people in some sense. “That doesn’t mean they won’t ask me to return sooner or later” he spoke it pretty shortly, he was expecting it at this point.

The way Jae made Eun act like he was nervous told him that he had hit a nerve with the elder male, Jae didn’t believe for a second he actually wanted to go through with this wedding and yet his sense of duty to the family would probably be enough to force him into doing it and there was very little the younger Dhampir could do to convince him otherwise. So Jae was focusing on reminding him of the facts but also being there for him because he was sure Eun was going to need someone to lean on through all this. “There’s always a choice, I just don’t think you’ll like the outcome either way” if he chose to marry then he’d be in a loveless marriage, if he chose to break the engagement their father would probably cut him off. “Father doesn’t like anyone telling him no” he responded candidly and shrugged his shoulders slightly but he did smile because being likened to his grandmother was a very high compliment.

He was doing his best to hold back tears at the memory of her, she had been a massive driver in the person Jae became, always telling him to choose the things he loved and not give in to his father’s strict rules. It was down to her that he was here in Evermore, it was thanks to her that he had met someone he loved so deeply he didn’t even know it was possible. Jae blew out a long breath as he looked back at Eun as he talked about his lack of experience “It still surprises me that you never experienced something like that in college” hell Jae had his first kiss as part of a dare in middle school which wasn’t exactly romantic but definitely spoke volumes about his brother’s ability to avoid affection. Jae pulled a face when Eun confirmed their father wrote out a list of possible brides “Because reading off a list is going to tell you who you connect with” he grumbled it in a sarcastic tone and shook his head slightly.

Jae gave a slightly guilty as he looked back at Eun “Well I head over to Han’s house a lot and he always makes dinner and then I clean the dishes afterward” he shrugged slightly, he was going to leave out the part about eating instant noodles every other night when he was at the dorm to avoid the lecture. It seemed like Eun did care about Ahreum but also seemed mad at himself for not feeling anything for her. Jae wasn’t sure he would be able to force himself to feel much for someone who had been handpicked out for him as the perfect partner either so he could understand. “I don’t doubt it’s going to hurt, but it’s going to hurt more if she realizes for herself a few years down the line” he grimaced slightly “You do realize father is going to expect you to have children too right?” which meant there was going to be no avoiding affection forever.

Jae still thought it was strange that Eun’s client would be so hellbent on getting him to fly out all the way here but he shrugged it off, he didn’t know all that much about being a lawyer and he was sure his brother knew how to handle himself at work. “Of course not” he protested when Eun asked him if he was kicking him out “If anything it’s me wondering the opposite, how long I might get to have you around” it was nice having someone familiar around, it made him feel more grounded and he was looking forward to getting to show Eun around the city in the next few months. Seeing the shocked look on Eun’s face, Jae nodded slightly “We do have those, though there aren’t all that many of them and nearly all of them are in Evermore” he blushed softly because he was thinking about Han and how brightly he glowed when he was happy “Honestly I have no idea, they don’t really either, they just wake up one day after falling from the sky” kinda magical if you asked him. Before long their drinks were brought over and the waiter asked their orders, Jae ordered the firecracker shrimp he’d had last time he had been here with a smile before taking a sip of his drink.

DhampirPermalink Reply by ✓ Sangeun Moon on November 2, 2019 at 14:42

"I used to think it was better that way than most. You may get offended but at least it wouldn't be like living a lie" Now that he's said that, if feels ironic considering that's exactly what the dhampir is doing; living his own life in a lie. He chuckled heartily when Jae said people would've assume asking the matters of age to be incredibly rude, "Thank God I've never actually asked someone their age here then. Wouldn't want to be dubbed rude just because I wanted to know how old they are." They were too used to using honorifics back home that Eun had to remind himself that wasn't usually the norm around here hence why he tended to keep to himself unless he needed to go and consult his client. "Nowhere is trouble-free, Jae. But it is better to live somewhere you wouldn't feel as burdened. Here, you can find that peace. Away from our family, away from all the judgemental gaze. You can be more of yourself here, right?" From the way he saw his youngest brother with his boyfriend earlier, it seems that Jae found something he never could have found back home. And it's definitely not just having a significant other too. 

Jae was right though, their parents had been egging him to talk to him when they knew he was going to venture to Evermore on a business trip such as this. Yet the eldest Moon made no effort to talk his brother into returning. "I know, our parents asked me to talk to you about that. Especially father. He wants you to realize that this is just a phase in your life, how you would eventually come back sooner or later once you realized there was nothing here. You're proving him wrong already, Jae. Don't worry about it, they'll be fine. Father would be a bit pissed that you're not listening to him again but what's new?" Advising his brother to go against their family should not be what Eun was supposed to be doing but he couldn't help it. Not when his brother has shown a different side here. He also knew there was no backing out of this wedding arrangement, even when Jae kept bombarding him with facts he knew all too well, his head kept reminding himself that this is what he owed to the family. A responsibility that he needed to carry out. 

"No, I don't think I'll like the outcome" he affirmed with a nod as he let out a heaved sigh, this was more complicated than he thought. "Our father has always been a strict man, Jae. He doesn't like hearing no in general. Being refused is something he couldn't tolerate as much as he tells himself he could." Which was quite unfortunate given his children's decisions. He could see the expression masking the younger male's features when he brought up the topic about their beloved grandmother who unfortunately passed away a while ago.  She was quite the matriarch in the family and it was no surprise that her grandchildren loved her dearly, especially one with such a rebellious streak like Jae, who reminded her of her younger self better than anyone else. Maybe that's why their father wasn't a big fan of her. A blush rose up the moment Jae expressed his surprise that his own brother hasn't experienced anything like a first kiss in school, "It's not a big deal… I just don't focus on things like that back then. You know how I was, always keeping to myself" Which was nothing the truth and a lie, Eun was sent to a private academy but he wasn't elected as the student body president without no one liking him, though the part about him being essentially reserved was true. 

"Besides… having your first kiss stolen because people thought someone shouldn't have to keep theirs untainted until adulthood is just childish." It does, however, speak volumes on how much Sangeun Moon managed to avoid any form of affection like that. He's never even had a crush on anyone, much less date them. Eun pressed his lips into a sheepish attempt to smile when Jae pulled a face after hearing their father did indeed made a list, "I know he wants the best for his children but I think nobody told him it's fine to let them decide too. Which admittedly… is my fault at part too because I didn't say anything." He didn't exactly protest and has only expressed his uneasiness that went unnoticed once again. "So you're living the domestic life with your boyfriend? Color me impressed and jealous." 

His brother was so much younger than he is, about 8 years apart yet he's already experienced the thing Eun desperately wanted to get a taste of. What would it be like to have someone he loves waiting for him as he went back? The atmosphere turned the tables when a pregnant silence ensued because Eun widened his eyes in realization that Jae was right, they would expect children, "I never thought of that…" Everyone knows how much of a family man Eun was, he wanted people to go back to when he checks out of work, but did he want it with someone he barely knew? "I feel like I'm a mess right now. The wedding is in less than 8 months and I haven't even thought about what comes after that" It was clear that the dhampir was worried about it but decided to push that aspect away by burying himself in work. He couldn't stray away any longer than he could, obviously. "You'll have me for a while, Jae. The case should be wrapped up in a month or so if things go well, not that I would want to extend it any longer even if I get to spend more time with you… but I can always come back for a visit."

 How easy would that be after his marriage though? He tried his best not to think of the probabilities that would only dull the moment. The story about fallen stars did manage to pique his interest for sure, especially upon finding out that his brother's beau is one of them. "When did you found out about him? After or before you guys started dating? How serious are you guys? Are you happy?" his grin grew significantly as he kept on bombarding Jae with questions, ordering his food as he propped his arm on the table to hear what his brother had to say. "I mean, the fact that you go over to his place to eat and do god knows what says a lot though."

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