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DhampirPermalink Reply by ✓ Jaesung Moon on June 5, 2019 at 20:52

It seemed like the week had completely flown by since the day he had finally made up with Han, the two of them had ended up falling asleep on the couch just like the way they always seemed to whenever they were exhausted. After that, they had agreed to meet Saturday and since then the two of them had been texting. Jae had a pretty busy week, classes were piling up and he had a lot of assignments so he’d been keeping his head down but also been counting down the days to their date. At first, Jae thought he was going to organize the date but then it became evident quickly that Han really wanted that dream date he always pictured in his mind, the one Jae always avoided because he knew how much money it would cost and the dhampir literally didn’t know how to react to grand gestures. But because it was Han and because this was where they fully started rekindling their relationship and mostly, because he knew how happy it would make Han, for one night, he was going to do his best not to think too much about it.

So he quite literally had no idea what to expect for tonight, he knew he needed to dress up a little and he knew that a car was coming to pick him up at a certain time. Other than that, he was kinda terrified about what he was walking into. Still, since the dhampir had missed the opportunity to give Han gifts on his birthday, he had a few things packed away in his bag for later. Jae was currently pacing the floor of tiny dorm room and probably driving the people below nuts, he didn’t know whether he needed to bring a change of clothes, the not knowing was kinda driving him insane. Jae was dressed in a plain white dress shirt and black slacks along with the only pair of smart shoes he owned but he was still undecided on a tie and jacket, eventually he decided on the grey one rather than the black one because the black felt a little funeral like and that wasn’t the vibe he was going for today.

He was ready with about to 10 minutes to spare before the car was due to come and he spent that time going through the bag he had with him and making sure he had anything and also playing with his phone a little nervously, he didn’t know what he really had to be nervous about, he and Han knew each other better than anyone and he knew the night would be special without a doubt but there felt like this pressure for things to go well because of all they had been through recently and Jae knew how prone to accidents he was. He actually couldn’t remember a single date they had where he hadn’t tripped or otherwise done something to cause a danger to himself. Though he did suppose they make for interesting stories and there was never any question that he and Hanseol would have something to laugh over. He was lost in thought, thinking of the stupid things that had happened, like accidentally ripping his pants mid-date once when he was interrupted by the sound of a knock on the door.

He made a somewhat surprised squeak because he had been so lost in his thoughts that he hadn’t even noticed that 10 minutes had already passed. Hesitantly he went to the door, opening it and seeing the box that was held out to him “Package for Jaesung Moon” the male had spoken, Jae had signed for it, looking down at the bright box and was seriously wondering what the hell he had signed himself up for. He took a deep breath as he closed the door and set the box down before he leaned down to open it. He studied what was inside and broke out into a bright smile seeing the little bunny and tiger origami animals which surrounded the letter, he picked one up noting the tigers were red, Jae’s favorite color and the bunnies were blue, Han’s favorite color. He took out his phone and grinned brightly holding up one of each in one hand and took a photo of himself with the other before he reached for the letter and opened it. He couldn’t wipe the smile off his face as he read through it, noting he was now to go and find the car waiting outside for him with still no clue where they were even going tonight.

He left the box on his desk so that he could go back through it later before taking a long breath, picking up his backpack and slinging it over his shoulder and heading out the door. His roommates perked up the moment they saw what he was wearing and one of them jeered ‘About time’ to which Jae rolled his eyes but gave a soft smile of content “Don’t expect me home tonight” he spoke shyly as he reached up to scratch at the back of his neck which elicited a wolf whistle from both boys. He shook his head and headed for the door “Don’t trash the place” he warned as he closed the door behind him and shook his hands out a little to try and shake out the nerves. Once he felt like he could breathe again he headed down the stairs and found the car waiting outside the building. A really nice one too. He did as he was told and got into the back of the car, greeting the driver with a nervous smile and putting his bag down on the seat next to him.

It was a really beautiful evening in Evermore city, the sky ablaze with color from the sunset which was due to come within the next hour or so and the temperature was moderate enough that Jae felt a little warm in a dinner jacket but he wanted to look good for tonight. It was about 5 minutes later when the car stopped outside the local florist, Jae had been here a few times on the very few occasions he’d wanted to buy flowers so he knew the owner. She was waiting there with a bunch of lilies in her arms which made the dhampir smile bright, bright orange ones just exactly like he had told Han he loved. After a moment of watching in awe, he opened the door and moved towards her to accept the bunch of flowers and smiled leaning down to smell them, a bit of pollen got on his nose which made him sneeze a little but he really did enjoy the smell of them. Well so far he didn’t feel completely overwhelmed, Jae took out one of the flowers from the bouquet and tucked it behind his ear before he took another photo of himself, smiling into the camera.

He was reading the letter that Han had sent him as the driver set off to the next location, his eyes taking in the words and his cheeks flushed because he was so touched by the fact the star had reciprocated the same thing Jae had always done for him to remind him how much he cared for him, Jae must have written him at least 50 by now. After getting back in the car, the route seemed to go scenically through the best parts of the city until it stopped once more outside the city square. Jae was a little confused about this one but he did as he was told and headed out of the car and stood in the square when the music began. It was honestly beautiful and Han had arranged it in a way that there were other people around listening to it so the attention wasn’t all on Jae, but he could tell from the songs chosen and the way it was all timed that it was for him. He was a little teary eyed as the last song finished, one hand over his heart as he couldn’t believe quite out lucky he was. Just as he was heading back to the car he was handed another letter. This time he took a photo with the sunset in the background of the city square, the slight tears evident in his eyes.

This one led on from the first and the dhampir found himself grinning like a loon as he read the words, stacking it on top of the other one, his fingers running over the paper as the driver went to the next location. Jae was starting to feel a little overwhelmed but he was glad the whole thing had been arranged tastefully enough that he didn’t feel like he was completely out of his element and everything the star wrote and arranged was so thoughtful and personal. It didn’t take long before the next stop outside a little book store. He furrowed his brow in confusion as he saw three little girls in cute dresses waiting for him, he shot the driver a look but opened the door regardless and was greeted by each in turn who shyly gave him a book. They were cliche books but so sweet regardless, but it was the little girls who captured his attention, so sweet and excited about his date with Han, it was clear the celestial made quite the impression on them. He asked them nicely if they could take a photo together and took a sweet photo of them hugging against his side, his eyes closed in bliss of the moment before he waved goodbye and got back into the car.

Now he had quite the collection of things on the seat next to him and the sun had finally set which told Jae that the next stop was likely the final location, he opened the letter and read it for that to be confirmed by the ending of the poem which told the dhampir he would finally get to see Hanseol next, he pulled out his phone once again and opened up WhatsApp to send all the photos he had taken of himself to his boyfriend. Jae hated taking pictures but he knew how much Han loved them and how much he treasured the few Jae let him have so since this was technically Han’s birthday celebration. When the car finally pulled up outside the hotel he felt jittery one again, his heartbeat rushing as he got ready for tonight. He tucked away all the letters and the books into his bag which he brought with him, the flowers in the other arm as he stepped out and followed the escort into the hotel and through to the restaurant.

The moment he stepped inside, his eyes searched for the star across the room and the moment he caught sight of him, the dhampir's breath hitched. He looked absolutely gorgeous and the smile on his lips was echoed in Jae’s, who was still blushing profusely from the overwhelming amount of special things Han had done for him already tonight. He couldn’t wait as he rushed towards him, his arms wrapping around the star and picking him up for a moment “You are absolutely crazy, you know that?” he spoke softly, but really, it was really touching how much thought Han had put into every part of the journey here. After a moment, Jae put him down and stepped back with a stupidly bright smile on his lips, still holding the orange flowers in his arms “But you did say you wanted to go all out so I suppose I should have expected it” he admitted with a soft loving look on his face, he felt butterflies in his stomach as he leaned in closer to the star.

CelestialPermalink Reply by ✓ Hanseol Park on July 7, 2019 at 15:25

The moment he set his foot inside the hotel, his eyes glazed over the interior in the restaurant when he was led there by the staff. He remembered he made a small request on how to decorate the entire place, specifically up to his personal taste, or more particularly, Jae’s. It wasn’t too grand and luxurious looking, sure he had to pay more but since he had already rent out the space for the entire evening, a few decorations here and there is not something he couldn’t do, he wanted everything to be perfect. Knowing them, something will probably happen but that’s fine, it will only remind him how much he missed all those accidental prone dates he used to have with his dhampir before their argument that lasted over a month long. The more he thought of it, the more it tore his heart bit by bit. The reconciliation between them last week was more or so the first step of mending their broken hearts over their distrust to one another and Han sure made sure to make up for it. 

Falling asleep soundly in Jae’s arms, that was not planned, but then again, neither did the whole fiasco where he stupidly speeds dialed Jae in his drunken state saying how much he missed him. Having already dressed in his finest suit this evening, leaning over his seat with one hand propped on the table, he was busy eyeing the pool when his phone suddenly vibrated, indicating that there were notifications that needed his attention. A few messages sent from the guy he’s been waiting for. The picture of them both adorning his lock screen didn’t cease to make him smile per usual, the Celestial couldn’t help but to pull a loving smile because getting Jae to take a picture generally was difficult, let alone take a selfie with him. Han genuinely didn’t care for such trivial manners where he wanted to do couple stuff that sometimes said no to them due to their time constraint but it didn’t mean his heart didn’t flutter every time they had the chance to do them. There were 4 attachments of media, 4 pictures. Oh, he received them already. 

With a giddy smile plastered on his face, Han clicked each picture. The first was him with the origami, one the fallen star made sure to create forms of tiger and bunny, in their favorite colors respectively, red for Jae and blue for him. It wasn’t much but he knew exactly how much Jae loves the gestures that took time and thought rather than throwing money just to plan this and that. Han wished to give him the best of both worlds so he did just that. The second picture was of him posing with a picture of flower tucked behind his ear which caused the Celestial to hold in laughter at bay because he was so close to squealing on the spot. Why? Boy was his boyfriend cute. “Cute” he giggled and swiped to the next picture, the third one, which was a picture of the dhampir with beautiful scenery as his background, one particular place he knew all too well. They liked to take walks there at the park with Yeontan and Byul. The place he orchestrated a busking band at, singing him songs that he knew had to be from the Celestial himself because it was quite literally a compilation of how his heart felt for the past month. 

Then came the last picture. Hanseol pouted slightly because he knew it was the end of the array of pictures he received, but then reminded himself that it only meant his man is on his way to the hotel, where he can finally reunite with him physically. A man with 3 giggling girls, ones he had picked personally last week. He smiled to himself because he remembered how giddy they were when he went to spend time with them. There was a reason why he picked the 3 girls, a reason that will be unveiled once the dhampir arrives in his arms. He didn’t bother to send back a message because he knows he was on his way, yes, Hanseol actually calculated the distance from the park and the hotel, something he does whenever he’s nervous or anxious. While he was busy fiddling with his fingers occupied with his feet tapping on the floor, he didn’t realize that Jae had already arrived. Not until he felt him wrap his arms around him and picked him up.

 The look on him couldn’t be any more obvious, he was surprised but now that he finally had a good full look at the male before him, it was then that he realized he’s dressed as formally as him. “Goddamn… you are breathtaking” he could feel his breath hitching at the mere thought of it, let alone stare at the glorious half-valkyr in front of him. Shaking his head to get back to reality, he grinned sheepishly and shrugged. “I can’t believe you’re calling me crazy, Jae, ouch… just ouch” he shook his head and placed a hand over his chest, feigning offense before his pout broke out into a smile. He’s been waiting for this day to come anyway. “I tried my best to do it moderately and not too fancy because I know you don’t like too much extravagance” he cast his gaze downwards because honestly, the sight before him was simply gorgeous and the more he found himself staring, the more he had to breathe out and fan himself. 

The restaurant was stripped of the bold colors and replaced with white and pastel colors to make it softer and everything else, even the napkins were white. Other than blue, Hanseol did like to wear white and black alone, the color scheme literally covers his entire wardrobe. But gosh, he missed him so much, so Han literally told himself to stop being such a coward and stepped forward to engulf the dhampir in a hug, burying his face into the nook of his neck and let out a relieved sigh. “Glad you were able to come to me in one piece” he teased and kissed his cheek before patting a spot at the chair across him. “Take a seat, your highness.” With that look? Who’s to say he’s not a prince? Well, he’s the prince of his heart. Scratch that, king.

 Taking a seat across him, his eyes never left his. “How did you like my surprises? Good? I hope you like the girls, they’re sweethearts, we probably should pay them a visit later on when we have time, the orphanage is not far” he grinned, it was definitely a genuine smile seeing as it traveled to his eyes, making it curve into a crescent. Hanseol met them when they came to volunteer at the pound, he was just giving out shots to the pets there per his weekend charity work, but when one of the little girls cried because she didn’t want to leave the poor Golden Retriever pup by the time they had to leave, he promised her to bring the pup to her every weekend for a visit.

DhampirPermalink Reply by ✓ Jaesung Moon on July 7, 2019 at 22:36

He actually had a lot of fun documenting his adventures on the way to the resturaunt and capturing these memories, for someone who didn’t take his photo often it felt pretty nice to let loose and just record a few happy thoughts. The two of them had been through a lot of sadness lately, being apart hadn’t been easy for him, he missed Han a lot and longed for him, often staring at the empty side of the bed where he was supposed to be. Maybe that’s why tonight had a certain pressure to it that he wasn’t used to feeling, he almost felt like it was their first date all over again. Except this one wasn’t just dinner at Han’s house, this was dinner jackets and people looking at them and generally fancy which had Jae a slight pile of nerves.

But that didn’t stop him from making his way to Han quite literally as quickly as his legs would take him and throwing his arms around him, it felt so good to be able to do that again, he’d missed having him in his arms so much and every day had just felt harder since then. He’d been looking forward to this date all week and to finally getting things back to the way they were supposed to be, hopefully, stronger than they ever were before. The other night had convinced Jae that there was a future where they could find compromise but he still felt concerned about it all. He blushed softly as he looked back at the celestial taking in the way he looked and smiling softly “You too” he ran a hand over his own jacket to smooth it down “I wasn’t really sure what to wear so I dug out the one jacket I owned that didn’t look like a funeral one” he laughed softly “You are crazy though” he looked around them at the emptied out restaurant “Who does this for a date?” he was smiling brightly though because he couldn’t believe this was all for him “I just don’t like you wasting too much money on me, you work hard for it” he scratched at the back of his neck not sure what to do next.

He took a moment to take in the decor around them, his eyes taking in the whole empty room and how it was subtly decorated, there wasn’t a single lit candle in sight which he was sure was one of Han’s specific instructions considering one of their dates had seen Jae set his sleeve on fire. His attention was snapped back to Han as he felt him pull him in for a hug and he squeaked a little in surprise but quickly wrapped his arms around him in return and leaned against his shoulder taking in his scent and the way he felt warm in his arms “It was a close one, I almost tripped over the sidewalk on the way back to the car a few times” he teased softly and let him go, closing his eyes and enjoying the feeling of his lips against his cheek “Your Highness?” he laughed softly “How formal” he teased but did as he was asked and took a seat on the chair, watching the celestial in awe from across the table.

“I was uh…” he pursed his lips “worried it would be pretty overwhelming but the songs were so beautiful and those little girls” he scrunched his face up making a cute expression showing how touched he was by all of it. He reached to tuck the backpack he had been carrying under the table by his feet before listening to what Han said “Orphanage?” his eyes softened thinking about how excited they must have been to get involved in the whole thing, they were speaking the world of the celestial like he was their favorite person ever “Were you trying to make me cry?” he laughed gently and reached over the table to take a hold of Han’s hand and rub his thumb over it “You know you don’t have to do all of this to impress me though? Nor did any of the things I brought really measure up but” he blushed “I did get you something for your birthday” he admitted with a soft smile “Just a little late but better than never right?”

CelestialPermalink Reply by ✓ Hanseol Park on July 8, 2019 at 18:46

Hanseol honestly didn’t expect for Jae to document every single thing since he wasn’t the kind of person who would actually it. Now he had more things to save when it comes to Jae, more than his notes and poems, pictures too. Han remembered he bought a Polaroid camera because of how old-fashioned it was truthfully it was so cute. He knew the pressure it would put on the dhampir though, so yes, once again the Celestial made sure there wouldn’t be too many people present, only the waiters and chefs, and even after delivering their orders, they would excuse themselves because it would be quite nerve-wracking for the both of them. Han never said it, but he knew Jae knows that he’s not exactly the boldest, he just acts like it. 

He was so deep in thought that he never noticed another presence in the room even when he usually could sense it due to his attentiveness. But no, this time, he was so deep that a spoon can clatter on the ground and Han wouldn’t really notice at all. Feeling his arms wrapped around him as if he was the only one that’s important there, it made him feel so significant that his heart was swelling with happiness to see his man dressed finely according to the dress code for the evening. Jae was already a fine and attractive lad in his early twenties, it doesn’t help that he’s also good in making him fall for him all over again. With his hair parted and the way he dresses, Han managed to look slightly older.

 From the corner of his eyes, he noticed the backpack that he was sporting which caused him to snicker softly. “You brought your backpack I see, good fashion though, wonder what possessed you into bringing it,” he chuckled teasingly and made sure to deliver his hug, displaying just how much he’s missed the dhampir even though it’s only been a week since they ‘reconciled’. It was still a matter of debate. Though he was very hopeful that he has forgiven him. “You’re always handsome, but dressed up formally really,” he wolf-whistled, earning himself a dry giggle, “brings out something in you.” The Celestial never stopped giving him compliments throughout their relationship and he wasn’t about to stop now of all times. “Don’t worry, Jae, you can wear anything and still rock it, with that face? You can even rock garbage plastic.” He had a sheepish grin on him as he glanced over at the interior design of the restaurant alone, shrugging casually as if it was nothing.

 “You know I would do anything for you, baby, though I did make sure it wouldn’t be too much. Who would rent out an entire space for a date? Your man, that’s who. The guy who wants to spend the rest of his life with you, that’s who” he winked playfully before settling in his seat, his eyes never leaving Jae’s own. He was utterly in love with the male before him, it was unreal. “You’re right, I do work hard for it, but it’s for me. You’re a part of my life too, shouldn’t I get to spoil you like how I spoil Yeontan and Byul? You’re my family too, Jae” he mumbled softly, taking his hand into his own, brushing his finger against his knuckles tenderly. “I wouldn’t believe you didn’t go about this day without any problems, my dhampir is my reckless baby” he cooed, a smile replacing the smirk and called the waiter who then came with a menu in his hands. “What can I say, you’re the king of my heart, babe.” Of course, he won’t let that slip away. 

The waiter placed the menus on the table and excused himself, giving them time to discuss what they wish to eat for their dinner today in a private setting. There was a reason why he rented the place out anyway. Thankfully working as a veterinarian pays as well as the stress takes the toll on the raven-haired star. “Yeah, they’re from the local orphanage, cute girls aren’t they,” it was no surprise that the fallen star loved kids in general, they were cute and squishy, being the youthful and childish Celestial that he was, it wasn’t hard to get along with them either. Besides, he always brought sweets all the time around, knowing how easy it was to win over their hearts and how he too, is a sweet-toothed guy. “Of course not… why would I want to make you cry, Jae, today is all about your happiness. I want to make it up to you and I know it will take more than just fancy dinner, but we have the entire evening so don’t worry.” 

His ears perked up at the sudden mention of presents though, and he looked back up from the menu, tilting his head slightly to the side and stare at the dhampir in confusion. “Presents? Jae… you didn’t need to. I’m the one who’s supposed to make up to you not the other way around…” but he didn’t dismiss his efforts nor did he downgrade it. He was immensely grateful that he still wanted to celebrate his birthday after what happened. “But thank you… it’s the first time I get to celebrate my birthday with someone, that alone was more than enough to get me doing, babe,” he cast a soft smile, making his eyes curve into a crescent-like shape, “I will love whatever you give me, Jae, don’t worry… God, I love you so much, you know that right?” he chuckled and propped one hand under his chin just so he could stare at the male a lot longer. 

DhampirPermalink Reply by ✓ Jaesung Moon on July 9, 2019 at 8:21

For a moment it felt like nothing had happened at all and it was just another date together, the last month feeling like it completely faded as he melted into the celestial’s arms, it was so easy to fall into old patterns and with Hanseol, he always felt like he was a little weak. He didn’t see that as a bad thing because his feelings for the star had always made him stronger in many other ways, his desire to protect and train had only grown since he met him, he had helped him to learn what it was he really wanted from his life and Jae had also been at a point where he felt like he was ready to face his parent’s disappointment. He would never regret loving Han, not in a million years but he did need longer to fully trust him again after what happened.

Jae chuckled when Han pointed out the fact he had brought his backpack, it couldn’t exactly be described as tattered but it certainly wasn’t matching his fancy outfit and definitely stood out, he couldn’t exactly just carry the things he brought with him though “I just thought it really accentuates my outfit, don’t you think?” he raised his brows in a teasing manner as he showed it off for a moment before he tucked it down onto the floor for later. He had wanted to show Han he was trying as hard as he was to fix this in his own way and while Jae’s gifts weren’t anywhere near as expensive or extravagant as this date was, he hoped the star saw it for what it was. He gave a light laugh when Han wolf whistled him and trailed his eye over his outfit “Trust you to have a thing for penguin suits” he commented as he reached up to fiddle with the silverish tie he was wearing “Though I have to say you’re looking very dapper” he grinned, okay, maybe it was nice to make an effort for a date.

It wasn’t a date with Han if he didn’t say cheesy lines that made the dhampir want to blush and hide, he broke a bright smile shaking his head a little “How did you even manage to get a place like this with a week’s notice” he commented with an amused chuckled “actually, don’t answer that, I don’t wanna know” he sighed softly in content as he took a seat opposite him and made himself comfortable in the chair, he was glad it was quiet, it felt like so long since things were just the two of them and easy like this, he was trying to take in the moment and enjoy it “I just don’t like not being able to return the favor” he admitted as he gazed over at him “and I know you’ll give me some cheesy line about liking anything I give you but” he bit his lip for a moment “I just want to feel like we’re equal you know, partners” which was his whole point all along really, he wanted to feel like the two of them were true life partners, to be there for each other and trust one another, to be the one the other turns to on their worst day and their best.

Once the menu was placed down he dropped his gaze to it for a moment, noting that the range and choices of food was pretty diverse and he bit his lip knowing how indecisive he was when it came to food, trust him to be panicking about what he wanted to eat of all things today. “The one not too far from the clinic?” he asked with a quirk of his brow, he had heard the kids playing down the road a few times when he’d come to check on Han at work a few times, it made him a little sad knowing those kids didn’t have any family but then he was reminded of how Han might feel like he could relate to them considering how his life had played out “It’s sweet that you took the time to befriend them, they spoke very highly of you” he chuckled “How many sweets did you pay them say all those nice things?” he teased knowing that wasn’t the case at all “I never knew you were so good with kids” he commented and pressed his lips together, he supposed they were still learning things about one another even now and they would continue to. When Han said he wanted to make it up to him Jae smiled softly “After the show put on just getting here, it makes me a little worried what you have planned” he chuckled softly “But food is definitely good” by now he had narrowed down what he wanted to two choices “Lamb or chicken?” he asked with a conflicted expression.

One thing Jae did notice is that Han had barely even looked at his own menu, throughout their whole conversation so far, his eyes had been on the dhampir and every time that Jae had caught his gaze it had been so filled with love and adoration that his breath wanted to hitch in his throat “It’s not about making up, it’s about the fact that I promised you we’d celebrate your birthday together and” he blew out a long breath “while we were together on that night I’d hardly call it a celebration” he gave a shy laugh and leaned down to pull one of the gifts he’d gotten out of his bag “Well don’t thank me just yet” he spoke shyly and smiled “I didn’t wrap them...mostly because it would have looked pretty terrible and” he was too busy rambling before he realized that Han was confessing to him and he blushed softly “Of course I know that” he spoke before he passed the gift over to him, it was a paint palette, on the side of it the words ‘Live by the sun and love by the moon’ and then their initials along the side. He blushed softly “The lettering isn’t perfect because I messed up a couple of times but..” he glanced up at him and smiled, Jae had begged Daehyun to show him some tricks with wood shop after catching him messing around with a blade and whittling one night “And I love you too...if that wasn’t obvious” he smiled gently.

CelestialPermalink Reply by ✓ Hanseol Park on July 9, 2019 at 16:57

The moment Jae stepped inside the restaurant that was already decorated precisely according to what the Celestial had in mind despite having only one week worth of a notice, Han had made sure that he would accommodate his dhampir's every need and want for the day, though it doesn't just stop there. Whatever he wanted, he will fulfill to the best of his ability. And that was saying something considering Hanseol knows no bounds when it comes to spoiling his boyfriend. That one month period where he had to suffer the loneliness while being an angsty miserable drunk wasn't a memory he would like to venture to anytime soon, or ever if it was up to him to decide. It wasn't easy trying to forget all of the things that he did, especially when the reminder of how much he hurt Jae was just in front of him; the very evidence.

Now that he was no longer under the influence of alcohol gearing his system and had a proper look at the dark-haired male before him today, he could pinpoint a few changes to him. His hair wasn't colored, surprisingly, and he remembered how much he liked to fawn over every time the dhampir was trying to choose the color from an array of every single one that would fit him perfectly without a doubt. He was buffer and more built, possibly due to the training that he had heard from him. They may not see each other for the past week due to his plannings and incessant effort on making today a perfect day, but that doesn't mean he didn't fish out his phone every once in a while and text him. Okay, maybe more than once in a while. Admittedly, the doe-eyed Celestial couldn't keep the excitement and enthusiasm to himself, much less keeping it from Jae. The backpack he sported was a bit out of the picture and it made him question and wonder what he possibly brought with him. Perhaps, he placed all the presents he gave him earlier? Or was there more?

"It definitely makes you stand out," he pointed out teasingly, his cheeks couldn't hold in the stretch that he's been dying to make since morning, nothing that a smile couldn't cure. Or more specifically, Jaesung Moon's smile. It was hard to see Jae wearing anything remotely 'formal', the latter was always with his casual wear and though he's never found a reason to actually complain nor dislike any clothing he wore, seeing him dressed handsomely with a prim cut from head to toe certainly did something to the Celestial. "You mean trust me to have a thing for Jaesung Moon dressed up? Yes. Definitely. I also have a subsidiary branch for that too, it's a department from liking everything that is Jaesung Moon, mhmm." The twinkle of mischief flashing in his dark hues made it look as if he was planning something dreadful similar to a prank when all he did was nowhere near that. "But you already know that, that's nothing new." He saw the color of the tie that he wore; silver. So in the end, Hanseol did make the right choice by wearing a black tie instead and though it may be cliche, it did match up well with Jae's silver one.

Upon hearing the compliment fished out from his lips, Han grinned gleefully in response, he's always been so weak for compliments from him. He could never truly get used to it, it made him blush every time. The fallen star could feel the blush rushing to his cheeks, forming a faint pinkish hue resting on both his cheeks. When the half-valkyr asked how he managed to book such a place under a week's notice, he was about to tell him the process until Jae said that it was best that he didn't know, which made him stifle his laugh. "Yeah, it's probably best that you don't know, babe, you probably wouldn't like it much," he cooed, one hand fixing his cufflinks as he stared at him with a reassuring smile, "don't worry, I didn't kill anyone, no murder took place." And of course, Hanseol would say things like that. His eyes softened when Jae told him that he wanted to return the favor per equally, he could never get used to being cared so much by someone, even if Jae is his boyfriend–a person that loves him. "I do mean it though, I like that we could spend time with each other alone, you giving me presents that I am sure took your time and thoughts, is just going to make me combust on happiness" he giggled and didn't try to say a word about it no more because honestly, he's already excited to see what his dhampir had under his sleeves.

Throughout the entire time, Han never took his eyes off Jae, not really. He found it hard not to reach out and pinch his cheeks because watching Jae return to his indecisiveness, especially when it came to food, priceless. "Yeah, the one near the clinic, the kids are soft, kinda reminds me a lot of me, not having a family and all of that." It should have made him sad to reminisce about that but Han only had a smile on his face, clearly stating that he's fine now, he had someone he loves by his side and a few friends to help him by, proving him that he didn't have to be alone. "I didn't bribe them okay," he placed a hand over his chest, feigning offense that Jae would say that, "though I did bring sweets with me whenever I come to visit. They're kids, I didn't expect anything less. I like them a lot, they seem so youthful, as if there's nothing bothering them, besides… they're cute." The way he had gushed on how much he loves them and how similar Jae feels made his heart swell with anticipation, wondering if they'll have a similar future to have kids such as that. Too far, Han. Too far.

"You like chicken a lot, I can count how many assortments of fried chicken we've eaten. So… pick lamb," he suggested, before humming to himself, rethinking what he just said, "on a second thought, just pick both, knowing you, you'd finish it anyway." There was a slight mirth in his voice, because god knows how true that is. "Well, if you're gonna celebrate my birthday properly, I demand a birthday kiss before the night ends." Sometimes, being simplistic is the best way to go. His eyes grew bigger in size when he slowly took in the present in front of him, his lips parting into a look of awe. "Jae- this is so thoughtful of you," his fingers traced the initials carved on the side, a giddy smile making its way up to his face as he chuckled softly at the way the dhampir thought of him in that way. "How can you say it's not perfect… it's perfect, Jae," though it did strike a chord in him because Hanseol hasn't been able to paint for a while now. Not ever since their fight. "Such a shame I couldn't use it… I would love to use it.., " then there is that matter of his 'injury', or at least that's what Han calls it. "Did you like the lilies?"

DhampirPermalink Reply by ✓ Jaesung Moon on July 10, 2019 at 16:37

There had been a lot for him to think about after the other night, he had gone from being in a place where he was sure he needed to move and slowly giving up on the idea of reconciling to answering that call in the middle of the night and coming running for the fallen star. Perhaps he was naive to think he could ever really move on, people always say that your first love stays with you in a way no other does and Jae understood it now. Even if they hadn’t managed to work things out, he knew Han would always have a part of his heart, a part that would always belong to the first person to ever claim it. There had been a lot of emotions on the line that night but walking away in the morning, the dhampir felt a sense of hope he hadn’t been able to cling to before, a chance to truly have the happiness both of them deserved without the secrets and the lies.

He definitely wasn’t completely there yet, there was still small doubts in his mind and moments where he wondered if he was setting himself for the heartbreak all over again but whenever he looked back at Han or got a stupidly cheesy message from him, it reminded Jae of what it was all worth, what they were fighting for. Love. He chuckled softly as he posed a little with the backpack before shrugging it off his shoulders “Stand out amongst all these non-existent people” he commented as he purposely swept his gaze across the room, there was literally only them and the staff at the restaurant. The way Han was staring at him made him a little self-conscious but he knew better than to worry about how he looked with Han by now, the star often assured him how much he liked the way the dhampir looked “Everything huh?” he dragged the words out with a smirk “That’s a lot of crazy habits and bad jokes to like” he chuckled softly as his eyes scanned over the fallen star taking in how crazy gorgeous he looked tonight, it seemed like they had both put in the extra effort.

Jae liked to see it when Han blushed, it was harder and harder to make happen, the longer they were together and the more confident he got, the more difficult it became to embarrass him or make him feel any sense of humility. Then again, that was one of the things Jae found most attractive about Hanseol, his unblinding confidence and the way he could say cheesy silly things without feeling any shame for it. He raised a suspicious brow as Han talked about it being better Jae didn’t know what strings he had to pull to get this on a last minute deal “On this case I think you’re right, though you better not have got yourself in any trouble over it” he stroked his thumb over his knuckled as he smiled gently “Cause there may be a murder if anyone lays their hands on my baby” he teased in a joking tone, perhaps it wasn’t quite that extreme but Jae would protect Han endlessly, consequences be damned. Jae smiled seeing the excitement Han held for the idea of presents, it was kinda nice to see him want to celebrate his birthday considering he never really had before “Please don’t combust, that would be very messy” he wrinkled his nose and smirked “Besides, I need you here with me” he tilted his head to the side a little.

There was a blissful look on the dhampir’s face as he heard Han talking about the little girls he had met at the orphanage, now that he thought about it, it must have been really in to check in every few days and it touched Jae’s heart knowing he was donating his time and knowing Han, probably his money, to make those children’s life better “Don’t let Yeontan and Byul hear you say that” he teased softly with an effortless smile, they were his family after all and he swore those dogs could quite literally communicate with Han like they were people. They both took a shine to the dhampir too, especially Yeontan who loved to cuddle up with Jae often. Still, Jae had never really seen Han with kids before, other than a few who brought in their pets to be treated at the clinic so he’d never really put the dots together but it definitely seemed like what Han might want one day is a family of his own, spouse, kids, probably a bunch more animals “Well it’s decided then, we’ll thank them for their help together” Jae closed his eyes for a moment remembering the photo he had taken with them before making his way back to the car.

He chuckled a little guiltily rubbing at the back of his neck before he glanced at the celestial and smiled “You know me too well” he admitted with a blush, he had fried chicken twice this week already so Han’s recommendation of lamb was pretty well founded “Lamb it is then” he commented and rubbed his hands together as he set down the menu, the waiter came back before long to pour out a glass of champagne for each of them to which he spoke a thanks and then eyed the bubbling golden liquid. “A kiss huh? I think we might be able to spare one before the night ends” he teased softly, he’d missed kissing him so much, not even deep kisses but little sweet pecks in the morning before university and before he fell asleep at night, things he realized he perhaps took for granted after they broke up.

He watched intently as the star took in the gift he gave him, watching the way he swept his thumb over the inscription which he had spent hours on end making sure was as perfect as a unpracticed and new to this person could be. He breathed a sigh of relief when said it was perfect, though it didn’t escape his notice that the star still seemed conflicted about his current painting issue. He squeezed his hand gently, “You will use it” he assured with an encouraging nod of his head “Maybe not right now but I’m sure you will use it” Han was an artist in his blood, Jae had seen his talents and raw creativity for himself and was absolutely certain that Han would find a way to return to painting one way or another, even if it wasn’t the same as he used to be. When Han asked him about the lilies he glanced over at them, they were set on the table next to him and their scent was tickling his senses “They’re beautiful” he spoke softly “The color of a sunset just like I told you about” he looked up at him through his lashes and smile before picking up his champagne flute “Should I be worried you brought alcohol and there’s an empty ballroom?” he asked with raised brows as he brought the glass to his lips and took a long sip.

CelestialPermalink Reply by ✓ Hanseol Park on July 11, 2019 at 18:54

The longer Hanseol stared at him, the more he realized that he wasn't going to be able to let the person sitting in front of him go. Hugging him earlier was one thing, but holding him, that was another thing just as well. It reminded him what it felt like to lose him, even if it was just for a month. That month was more than enough for the Celestial to feel the emptiness and loneliness seeping back inside him like it never left. In fact, if anything, it definitely grew a lot more worse. If before his ache never went above wanting someone by his side, after knowing what it feels like to have someone by his side, especially someone like Jae, his desire to have the same grew tenfold. Countless possibilities were hidden amidst the many reasons inside his head and he would rather keep them sealed from the world. 

He was so worried that his hopes on reconciling with Jae would've been futile, it wouldn't exactly be the first time the fallen star had thought about that. The scale tipping between the balanced weight wasn't keen on giving him hopes either. Only his faith and belief on Jae's love for him kept him going. It was the only thing he could actually hold on to. They say you never really forget your first times; your first kiss, your first friend, your first love… and Han could not see it as anymore than right. Admittedly, Jae filled in many of those vacancies. It was no wonder his significance felt the most unearthly. But secretly deep down inside him, Han knew it was more than that. Jae wasn't just his first love. Han wouldn't dare to assume there were more words to pick it up but Jaesung Moon is more than just a one phase thing. If that was a phase, then he didn't want it to end. 

"I cherish privacy above a lot of things and I know you do too, hence why I made sure it's empty for the day," he chimed, a bright smile adorning his lips, stretching it out to his cheeks and eyes, showing just how enthusiastic he is to be here today. With him. "I want it to be just the two of us spending time together, just you and me. Hanseol and Jaesung. Like it's always been." Han had a way of saying things, sometimes they don't mean much, but the way he said it, it definitely changes everything. He's not good at poetry or any literature kind like his boyfriend, contrary to the dhampir's belief, he wasn't golden at almost everything. "You told me the last time when I was at your place and your brother came to visit. You told me that I was in for a crazy ride and it wasn't too late to back out," he leaned closer and pressed his hands flatly on the table, grinning like he's never met someone quite as precious as he is, "and what did I say? I said that I was in for that ride and nothing you do will ever make me feel the opposite. I didn't sign up for the idea of you, I signed up for you." And he truly means that.

 Jae had been the best thing that had ever happened in his life and he's lived a pretty miserable lonely one at that. "Besides, your jokes aren't all bad. At least you don't pull out dad jokes like Eun. I like your brother but I swear he has this switch that is always on." The raven-haired fallen star didn't miss to take in how ethereal Jae looked, marvelling in how neat he presented himself tonight and he couldn't be anymore happier that it was all for him too. Blushing had no been a normal occurrence as of late due to the Celestial growing more confident throughout his time with the half-valkyr, almost nothing fazes him anymore. Keyword being almost. Had it been up to Jae, the star knew that the dhampir could make him blush every second if he wills for it. He knows him well enough to know how to do this and that. "I didn't get any trouble for it," he reassured and had a stupid grin plastered on his undying smile from earlier when Jae said he would raise hell to anyone who would dare harm a hair on his body. No doubt Jae can protect him. The idea of his person protecting him made his heart flutter, because who wouldn't? 

He's never given much thought about his birthday, much less a way to celebrate it. Most of the time, he didn't even recall when is when. But seeing the way Jae poured in his thoughts and consideration to give him a present, it couldn't make him anymore happier than he already is. His hands held on the paint palette carefully, rereading the initials carved on the side a few more times. It reminded him of something. "Y-you need me here with you-" to say that he was in awe would be a great understatement. The Celestial was quite literally gaping at how his heart started beating faster than usual. "Wow...Jae, you know today I was going all about spoiling you but here you are… taking my heart into your hands and squishing it again. It's unfair how you make me flustered so easily," he whined. One month of being away in his own sorrow and loneliness clearly gave him a bitter answer that he should treat Jae better because he's not going to get anyone like him. It's a one time gift for himself. And he'll be damned if he would let go such a blessing in his life the second time.

 "Pretty sure those two fluffballs already know," he chuckled endearingly, the thought of having a family never really came around but seeing the kids playing around, it made him want another. He wanted something else too. He wanted them too. "We should definitely pay them a visit next time" the giddiness lacing his voice was almost unrecognizable, Han liked them a lot. No, liked would be an understatement. He loved them. He felt a natural pull toward them. As soon as Jae placed his order, he did too. Though it was clear that most of the time, he didn't even bother looking at the menu but the dhampir before him instead. Not that anyone could blame him. Running the tip of his finger around the rim of the glass gently, he chuckled wryly and smirked upon hearing his statement. "Only one? Ouch Jae… I can feel the pain of rejection and doubts right here-," he placed on hand over his chest and scrunched his nose up, frowning in feigned pain as he patted it a few times, "I need a remedy. But I'll still hold you on to it, Mr Moon. One minimum kiss before the night. I'm going to claim it" he promised playfully. 

As if knowing how put off he was by the fact that he's been trying his best to recover from his 'hand injury', Jae squeezed his hand which caused Han to look at him with those vulnerable and pained look. Drawing had been his everything. It was the only thing accompanying him through his years, aside from his silver bracelet. Jae knew that. Coincidentally, the hand Jae squeezed was the very same one that he injured when he first ruined his knuckles by battering it against the wall continuously out of frustration. "I hope so... " Seeing how Jae's curiosity peeked out, Han shrugged. "Could be. But how could I ever do such a deceitful thing… my motive is definitely not getting you tipsy enough to dance with me because you're a fantastic ballroom dancer and you're being stingy about showing it to me."  He wasn't the only one drinking, Han finished his and as if on cue, it was refilled. "Looking at you now… I forget how much I undermined the level of adoration I have for you. God I missed you so much… you have no idea how happy I was that I was given a second chance that I know I didn't deserve after breaking your trust like that. So thank you for giving me this."

DhampirPermalink Reply by ✓ Jaesung Moon on July 12, 2019 at 10:52

Perhaps people could call him blinded but Jae really did feel like he had found something good in Hanseol, yes, it was his first relationship and everyone talks about how your first relationship, while one you will always remember, is rarely one that lasts but the dhampir thought differently. Maybe that was just him being so wrapped up in his feelings for Han that he sounded just like everyone else in that situation but there was something about them that was special. Jae had kissed people before back in high school and Han wasn’t his first crush but he was the first person who had truly made him believe in himself, made him see a future for himself that wasn’t tainted by what other people wanted for him or thought he should do. Han was the first real choice Jae had made that was entirely made from his heart and he couldn’t bring himself to regret it, even if it crashed and burned and ended with his heart shattered into pieces, he didn’t think he would ever regret falling in love with Hanseol.

“Yeah I remember it took four months to even get a key to your house so” he chuckled softly but he understood, for someone who spent his life either locked away or running there was probably a certain required need for security in order to even function and go about your daily life “But yeah, I prefer there not to be a crowd” that was the case for all their dates, he preferred it when it was just the two of them and they could focus on being together, getting to know one another and generally just enjoying one another’s company. He smiled when Han paired up their names together because it sounded like they belonged together from his tone, like there was no question that they came as a pair, it made his heart flutter a little in his chest “Well it’s just you and me wherever we go, package deal” he spoke softly “But this restaurant is really nice” he added with a gentle smile not wanting to downplay the star’s taste nor the gesture itself. Jae smiled wistfully as he remembered that day that Han met Eun and how elated the two of them had been for someone in Jae’s life to know and accept their relationship “Down for the ride” he spoke softly with a look of awe remembering that song coming over the radio one night on one of their dates “You know this isn’t the only time we’re going to fight though” he met the star’s eyes, they needed to get better at resolving their differences if they wanted to make things work.

The way he brought up Eun’s dad jokes made the dhampir laugh, he definitely had a point, his brother had the cheesiest, on the nose, sense of humor he had ever seen in a person and he had no idea where it even came from considering their father wasn’t a funny man at all “My jokes are pretty bad though” he spoke and scrunched up his nose, he just tried to make people smile mostly, pulling goofy faces and being silly was second nature to him because he just hated to see people sad and that was his way of handling it “You get used to his humor” he defended with a laugh “About 5 years down the line it’ll just be second nature” he chuckled wondering what their life would be like in 5 years, so much could happen in that time, especially in a city like Evermore. Seeing the way Han smiled when he swore to protect him brought one of his own though, he wanted to protect the star with everything he had, always would to be honest, it was why despite the fact he was mad at him, he couldn’t leave Han to wander the main road drunk the other night “Good, because I really would give them hell” he gave him a crinkly smile.

Jae had never really been big on birthdays either, it was Han who had made a big deal about his and wanted to celebrate it a few months back but it felt significant to celebrate Han’s considering he had told Jae he’d never really celebrated it before. Jae liked making a big deal about his star and the things they got to do together, they might be considered pretty normal to him and others but he knew Han had missed out on a lot from never having a childhood and spending most of his life locked up in a cage, it was a pleasure to get to see him experience so many firsts and to be a big part of many of them. “Of course I do” he affirmed as he looked back at the star, it was passing comment but he meant it, being with Han had definitely brought a lot of light to his life and maybe he had allowed him to become a little dependant on him. At first that scared Jae a little but now he realized that leaning on someone was what you were supposed to do in a relationship, something he wanted “I realized that uh” he paused “a relationship isn’t about just you and me, it’s about us, it’s about sharing burdens and life together” he nodded a little “So I need you” he spoke softly hoping that didn’t sound pathetic.

“They’d better already know, it’s not like you don’t spoil them to the moon and back” he chuckled thinking about all the treats and toys the two of them had between them and yet Han almost always came back with more for them every week, Jae was sure he just couldn’t help himself at this point and laughed it off whenever Han would sneak in a new gift for them. “You’re full of surprises” Jae commented as he looked back at Han noting the look of adoration in his eyes that wasn’t directed at Jae. He really hadn’t noticed the attachment Han had to kids before but now it was as clear as day to him “Is that what you dream about?” it was a bold question but Jae had asked Han if he had a dream once and the celestial told him he didn’t really know “Having a family?” it wasn’t him asking to get married or anything crazy like that, Jae just wanted to know what it was Han was searching for in life. If everything wasn’t complicated and dangerous, what life he would choose for himself. Han’s teasing about getting one kiss made the dhampir laugh scrunching up his face in amusement “Minimum” he repeated with a smirk knowing once the formalities were out of the way it was going to be hard to resist.

Jae didn’t have any doubts in his mind that Han would be able to paint again, he supposed he just put all of his belief into him, he had seen the joy it brought the star with his own eyes, on a Sunday afternoon, when he had the easel by the window of the best lit room in the house and just sat there focused and his brush caressed the canvas. Jae could watch him for hours when he was in the zone like that, though the star usually chased him off for being too distracting “I know so” he spoke softly with an assuring nod but left it at that, he could tell the topic was still raw for Han but the dhampir was already thinking of ways he might be able to help him overcome it. When Han spoke about getting him drunk to get him to dance the dhampir chuckled under his breath “You’re so sneaky, but very obvious at the same time” he teased as he lifted the glass to his lips and downed the full flute before setting it back on the table “I don’t dance” he spoke matter of factly “You know this” his voice was low, okay he did dance but he wasn’t especially big on showing it and he hadn’t done it in a long time.

Han’s words made his face light up with an effortless smile, he really felt like things were going to be better this time around and he sincerely hoped that he wouldn’t come to regret thinking that but Han had promised him no more lies and he really wanted to believe that and see it become reality so that was what he was holding onto right now. It wasn’t exactly easy considering it wasn’t the first time he’d heard those words but he felt like the distance and time had given the star much-needed perspective on what their relationship was “I missed you too” he spoke softly as he lifted his gaze “So much” he added with a long breath “I’m really glad you called me….even though you were drunk and probably thought it was a mistake” he chuckled softly still enjoying the small touch between their hands over the table and just being able to hold the star again in some way “Han” he tilted his head slightly “Do you ever worry about what I think about you?” he was curious to know what fuelled the star’s need to avoid the truth sometimes.

CelestialPermalink Reply by ✓ Hanseol Park on July 21, 2019 at 16:08

The longer he stared at the male before him, the more he knew he made the right choice. While there were plenty of choices and decisions that he may regret in the future, choosing Jaesung Moon as his partner at life was one choice he knew he would never regret. The thought alone had never come across his train of thought, not once. To Han, that was a good thing because having doubts about your boyfriend, that’s not exactly the best way to start off your reconciliation stage, right? He remembered he had so many things that made him apprehensive. Unlike his dhampir, Han was inexperienced to the core. He had no room of experience when it came to relationships, much less on anything about ‘life’ in general. Han never had a first kiss, a first friend that actually lasts longer than a day or two, a first date, and certainly not a first boyfriend or girlfriend. Not until he met Jae. Jae… how can he even begin to describe that man? He was everything that sometimes Han wished to be, but being his boyfriend also meant he’d share the same experiences and he’s all fine with that too. Obviously, he knew things wouldn’t be as easy as he wanted them to be at first, especially after seeing how broken they were shortly after their breakup and argument. A break. Han wouldn’t be able to handle it if they were to go through that again, or worse. The prospect of losing a person such as him, a person that is him… no, he couldn’t even think of it. Falling in love with Jae was his choice, and it had been the best choice he’s ever made. Period. 

Han rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly when the talk about getting the key to his house took about 4 months, where’s the lie in that? Naturally, for someone like him, it will take quite some time to go through the process of trust and knowing when he can trust them. With Jae, truthfully it made him feel a bit embarrassed because it took that long, and he’s been dating for 4 months. “To be fair… it was for 3 months. I had the key forged a month before that…” he mumbled inaudibly, finding it hard to meet his eyes but eventually did it anyway because he knows eye contact is the best way to see if he was telling the truth and he wished to give that closure to Jae, at least that. Package deal. That alone made his eyes lit up like a child’s peripheral vision who received the best present on Christmas. “That’s exactly what we are, a package deal, me and you” he nodded profusely with a bright grin. Sometimes, he couldn’t help but view their relationship to be somewhat, childish. Yet he found no error in it, Jae is still young, he only reached 22, and Han technically looked to be no more than 21. Instead of childish, he’d say they’re youthful. Filled with so much energy and ideas.

 “I told you over and over again, Jae, I only reserve the best for the best, which is you” he winked playfully and found how ironic the song fit the title. It did play during one of their dates and fit the scene so well. When the half-valkyr met the Celestial’s doe eyes, he sighed and nodded in agreement. “I know that… it won’t be the only time we’ll argue and I hate to say it, but I’m not going to break it off whenever we argue. Not everything is fairytale-like, Jae. But I meant what I said, I’m down for this ride. No matter how many problems that come our way, I will stand tall and we’ll resolve it together. No more lies. I promise.” Taking his hands into his, he could feel the warmth radiating from the dhampir and only smiled reassuringly at him. “Besides, when you move in, it’s harder to keep anything anyway,” there it was, he said when instead of if. “I’m sure I’ll get used to his humor, I mean I did get used to yours, right?” Oops, the star quickly placed a hand over his mouth to cover it while he giggled at how he literally just outed the fact that Jae was pretty bad at cracking up jokes. 

“5 years huh? What would be of us in 5 more years, I wonder,” Hanseol had his lips jutted out in a pout while he put one hand underneath his chin, eyes looming over as if he was thinking about it in deep thought. Honestly, a part of him was actually doing that. Where will they be in 5 years? “You would already work since you would’ve graduated… I’ll still be working obviously, I mean if I live that long,” was it a joke that slipped out? Truthfully, Han couldn’t say much for sure. He wasn’t sure if he’d still be able to find a way to evade all those ‘troublesome’ Celestial camaraderies. “Kidding. Shouldn’t we be married by then?” he tried to cover it up with a wry grin as he suggested the idea of being newlyweds. It wasn’t just a dream for Hanseol. When Jae talked about the kids, that was what he wanted earlier, he was positive that it was. Building his own family with his loved one, living the rest of his life basking in their company, that’s what he wanted. Han would lie if he said he was affirmative in thinking about living long, but Jae said he’d protect him, right? Yeon is also there to protect him. It made the Celestial feel useless because he knows no matter how long he tried to get into the offense stance, it wouldn’t work. He was stressed out so to say. 

Perhaps, it was a good thing about him; someone who couldn’t hurt a fly even if he desperately wanted to. But it was also a huge disadvantage if anyone tries to have a go at him. Maybe it was a curse, but it’s his curse, a curse he’ll keep with him until the end. Seeing Jae wanting to celebrate his birthday could very well just produce tears from the fallen star because he’s never had anything such as that. Before this, birthdays are just one of that day in every year that his age adds another number. Another year to add his misery inside the cells too. But now that he’s out and he had someone to celebrate it with, he felt content. Han was happy that he had someone looking out for him, in this sense; the kind where he can go home to his embrace and kiss him whenever he misses him.

 They’ve never been that good at expressing themselves in words, aside from poetry and notes they wrote to each other in a piece of parchment. That’s why hearing Jae tell him that he needed him, he felt important. A sense of significance embedded in the roots of his heart, it was no wonder he could feel his heart swelling with pride and happiness all the same. “You make me feel so important, baby…” he chuckled softly and caressed his hands tenderly. Han was a simple guy, even the smallest hint of affection shows how much he admired that person hence why even the brief brushes against Jae’s knuckle meant so much. A sign of appreciation. “Secretly they probably knew, but they didn’t show it, I’m cool with it,” of course Han had no problem with that, he was always doting on them everyone could see it, but having such a relationship with the two fluffs made him laugh. Jae always liked to show his love for them just as well, so much that he forgot they were actually his in the first place. 

It made him wonder if Jae was equally as good with kids the same way he was good with his pets and judging from the smile on his face, he was in it for a treat because it does look like he was good with them. With a heart as golden as the dhampir’s, he was so sure no one can ever find a reason to dislike the male. That question from Jae rendered him speechless for a brief while, leaving the fallen star to gawk at the male sitting across him with an unidentified look. Well, that was unexpected. “I dream about having people I can go home to… people I know I’d look forward to coming home to. So that one day, when others ask why I’m rushing to go back home, I can tell them that I have company waiting for me. The kids… I don’t know why, but they seemed to be the epitome of purity and kindness, I wanted someone like that to be with me too. To take care of them because whenever they achieve something or easily when they’re just generally happy, I’d have a proud grin on my face watching from a distance.” It didn’t occur to him that he talked about it with such intensity and passion, so much he felt like if he was given a platform to talk about it, he would’ve flown in the air. 

Though he did have a suggestive smirk adorning his lips upon hearing that there was a lot more to it after the whole formalities. “Minimum okay? I’m holding you to it, Moon. Don’t play games with my heart, it’s fragile.” The talk about his ability to paint was a rather sore one, something that was highly sensitive for the Celestial and it seems that Jae also sensed it because he didn’t go any further into it, to which Han was eternally grateful for. He had no doubt that what Jae said was true, sometimes, the dhampir knows him better than he knows himself. Perhaps, there was some truth to what he said. Maybe there was hope for him again. But not today. Today wasn’t supposed to be filled with a somber mood, it was a festive day for the both of them. His doe eyes widened considerably when the dhampir downed the entire glass just like that. Jae wasn’t a drinker, he knows that. Witnessing that bold and daring move from the half-valkyr made the Celestial flustered because he wasn’t expecting that. “Mhmm… you told me you don’t dance. But, who knows… maybe you just don’t want to show me. It’s not technically a lie anyway, we’ll see, Jae, we’ll see” he squinted his eyes in a scrutinizing manner as he held up his own glass before finishing the wine in it so soon after it was refilled. He knew that despite the mood all happy and joyous, they had to talk over about some things. Particularly the ones that bothered them. Especially Han’s need to avoid the truth because he was afraid of telling the truth to Jae. 

And the question was asked, right now, it took the fallen star by surprise to see the way it surfaced so early into their date. His throat suddenly felt dry like the Sahara desert. “I…” why is it so hard to do this? He could feel the contemplation underlying his words. Until his dark hues clashed with the male’s own. He can’t lie to that. No, the promise was to not lie. “Yes.” Upon saying that simple word, he felt as if the weight just jumped off his shoulders. “I didn’t want you to have a different perception of me… I didn’t want you to leave… like how it’s always been for me,” he chuckled bitterly because where’s the lie in that? “But don’t take this the wrong way, Jae… It wasn’t because I thought so lowly of you that I didn’t trust that you would love me either way. It’s not easy being with me… I’m a trouble magnet. Everywhere I go, I attract danger. I guess, one day I asked myself, how long can you keep up with my angst behavior, Jae? If I were you, I wouldn’t be able to. All of those things got into my head and I felt afraid, that you’d eventually leave me and I’ll be alone again, which would hurt tenfold because I gave my heart away and you would’ve taken it away with you.” His eyes truly softened like he was a puppy that just got kicked, those dark hues pleading with the dhampir not to get mad at him because he wouldn’t be able to handle it. “It was stupid of me.”

DhampirPermalink Reply by ✓ Jaesung Moon on July 21, 2019 at 22:55

He saw the way that Han looked a bit flustered about the whole key situation and he laughed softly shaking his head a little “I’m not calling you out on it Han” he clarified with an easygoing smile and he stroked his thumb softly against his hand for comfort, it was nice to be able to just talk things out without all the hostility of their fight or the high emotions of the last time they had seen one another. Today was a clean slate where they just figured things out “Honestly, your ability to trust quite literally anyone after all you have been through says everything” he meant that, he’d never seen someone quite so steadfast in the face of all the hardship and pain the celestial had been through. Jae found it impossible to even imagine what it must have been like to be locked up for 100 years. The way Han’s eyes lit up at the word he spoke made Jae’s eyes soften as he looked back at him “Exactly” he responded with a firm nod, this was about figuring things out together and becoming a team, one that couldn’t be broken apart. Perhaps they were young and naive but Jae wanted to find a way to make things work, no matter how hard it was.

He chuckled softly “You have said that a few times, yes” he admitted and shook his head slightly amused from the way he spoke, Jae would never have described himself as the best, in fact, he probably considered himself to be quite average when it came to societal standards, especially because he was a student with very little to his name but Han often reminded him that he thought so much more of him and that was incredibly uplifting for the dhampir. Looking down at their joined hands when Han spoke he nodded a little, that was all he wanted to hear, that the two of them were going to be able to talk things out properly now and that Han’s first instinct wasn’t going to be to hide things and bury his emotions “You’re right, it’s not always going to be perfect but if we can talk the way we are now, it doesn’t have to be hard does it?” he hoped they could prove that true because Jae wasn’t sure how he was going to handle another break like the one they went through. “When I move in huh?” he spoke with a raised brow “Bold words daystar, bold words” he laughed gently but slowly softened his expression more seriously “We should talk about that, maybe not tonight but we should” he nodded, he was ready to move in that night, it only seemed right Han knew about that now.

“Well you’re the one who chose to continue hearing them for the foreseeable so really the joke’s on you” he teased back with a mock eye roll when he called his jokes bad. The thought about where they would be in 5 years did play on his mind though, 5 years felt like a long time for him considering he was only 22 but he supposed 5 years felt a lot faster for Han. “With any luck by then I’m doing something with the degree I got and not working in some store” he laughed softly because he was indirectly quoting the things his parents had told him about the path he was following and how being a writer wasn’t a sound job. He did quieten when Han spoke about not living that long, shooting him a look of disapproval but he didn’t make a comment because he quickly covered it with a kidding statement and then spoke about marriage. That definitely shocked him and he pressed his lips together a few times as he tried to think about what to say “Damn you really have thought this through” he spoke a little in disbelief because he supposed he’d been living from day to day rather than planning for the future but it was clear now Han saw things further.

The definitely gave the dhampir some food for thought which sat at the back of his mind, the fact that Han had been thinking that far ahead definitely showed his level of commitment and thought when it came to this relationship, one that seemed to outdo even his own. “You are important” he spoke softly to him and looked him in the eyes, he never thought that a relationship would be on the cards for him when he decided to move to America and pursue his dream of becoming a writer here. He didn’t expect to meet someone that lit up his whole life and changed his own perspective on the person he was and the life he intended to live “You have quite literally changed my life in so many ways” he admitted with a soft nod, Jae felt like he knew himself so much better than he did a year ago and a lot of that was thanks to Hanseol. And he did suppose that he, Han and the animals Han kept were somewhat of a strange little family right now.

All this talk of family and looking to the future definitely had Jae curious about what Han saw in his future, what he wanted from life if he wasn’t held back by the fact that he lived the life of a fallen star, what motivated him to live and to push forward in life. He saw the way it surprised Han and the way he went quiet as he thought deeply about what the dhampir had asked, Jae waited patiently for him to gather his thoughts reaching for his drink and taking a long sip. When Han spoke he listened to him speak, the way his voice lifted a little the way it always did when the celestial was particularly passionate or invested in something made Jae give an easy smile. When he met Han the star had told him he didn’t really have a dream for himself and Jae had accepted that but it seemed now Han had found what it was he wanted from life, what motivated him and the dhampir was so proud to be even a little part of that. “I’ve seen how caring and considerate you can be, you’d make an amazing father” he complimented with an easygoing smile, Jae felt like he was a little too young to be thinking about that yet but he definitely saw the idea of a family in his future one day. He lifted his gaze to meet Han’s “Thank you for sharing your dream with me” he spoke sincerely, it was the first time he had heard Han admit he wanted something for himself like this.

He chuckled softly “I’d argue your heart is tougher than you say but I don’t intend on breaking it” he spoke and nodded a little, he definitely wanted to reconcile that part of their relationship too, though he knew it wasn’t going to be as simple as falling back into bed with each other, Jae wanted to feel reassured that this was marking the end of the difficulties they were going through and the start of a place where they saw one another as equal and moved to build a life together equally, especially if they were looking far enough into the future to consider marriage and children. “Baby you’ve seen me fall over entirely nothing many times over and fall up the stairs at least a dozen times, you really think me dancing is going to end well?” he pouted a little, he did know some ballroom but he also distinctly remembered tripping and stepping on toes a lot while doing so and that still continued even after he finished learning. Still, he knew after a few drinks, the star could probably look at him with those doe eyes and he would give him everything and anything he wanted.

He knew it was pretty early in the night to be bringing up such a topic but frankly, he wanted to get the heavy out of the way first, especially because the two of them had too much to drink because he wanted this conversation to be real and honest as possible. He had been mulling over reasons that Han could have for hiding things and generally pushing himself aside for a while now and in the end, his conclusion is that it was likely to do with some underlying fears Han must have about the world and the people in it. He tried to segway into it as delicately as he could but he needed to hear it to move forward, he wanted to understand what the celestial feared and why so that he could ease his troubles or at the very least, sympathize and put himself into Hanseol’s shoes. He swallowed when he heard the word yes but he didn’t interrupt, instead letting Han explain the way he felt. When he was done Jae nodded a little “It always comes back to you feeling like a burden on someone else huh?” he spoke with a sad smile and squeezed his hand gently “You should know I don’t give up easily, when I care about someone, the level of love and trust I pour into them, it’s unlimited, unconditional” he nodded “It’s not your fault that you’re a fallen star Han, in fact, it’s not your fault that people think they can take what’s not theirs” he pressed his lips together “I know that a lot of people have let you down but, give me the chance to prove to you that I won’t?” he nodded softly “I promise you that I won’t give up on you” he met his eyes to show how serious he was.

“And I’m not leaving you, okay?” he knew that might sound empty considering they broke up but Jae had never really left him in truth, the moment he knew Han was in danger he had come running regardless of the circumstance and he couldn’t see a day when he wouldn’t do that, even if they weren’t together he would always protect Hanseol and care for him “And it’s not stupid Han, it’s how you feel” he nodded a little “You can’t feel stupid for the truth and I would never judge you for sharing it, even if I find it hard to understand” he was serious, all he wanted was this level of openness and truth, he wasn’t expecting to like everything he heard but he wasn’t going to get mad about it either.

CelestialPermalink Reply by ✓ Hanseol Park on July 24, 2019 at 18:10

It was clear by the way Han acted when Jae said something about the moving in part with the key given to him on his birthday a few months ago, the Celestial was easily flustered like that. He could feel his cheeks flaming up and how warm but sweaty he felt when he kept fiddling and brushing his hands together. He was still shy around Jae, it can be 4 years or 4 months, that will never disappear from him. He stared at the way Jae brushed his thumb against his hand reassuringly and let out a sigh that he wasn’t even aware he’s been holding in this entire time. It’s so nerve-wracking to be around his boyfriend sometimes, and that always made him smile when he’s alone in his room at night because he knew that’s what he’s supposed to feel for him. Shy. It was amazing how Jae can easily calm him down or make him freak out with just his touch. “I guess we have to hope for the best if we want to make the most out of it, no?” he quipped softly as he stared at him with a small smile, that’s right, be positive, Han. 

“You and I… we’re going to last, right?” there was slight apprehension in his tone, it wasn’t really much a statement, but just something he needed to hear from Jae, his eyes showed hope in them. It could be a word, nothing more, but to Han, it was clear considering how significant Jae is to him, it meant the world to him. A while after that, he pressed his lips into a soft smile and stared at him with his doe eyes and squeezed his hand comfortingly, “Because I meant it, and I feel like you needed a reminder, so why not, right?” he chuckled slightly and craned his neck, relieving himself of the overtime he did the last two days just because he wanted to get a day off today, so much he actually fell asleep surrounded by paperwork until his muscles ache, it was no wonder Yeontan came into his office and slept on his lap. “I’d rather live a hard life if it meant I won’t be alone. I just… can’t handle being alone again. I don’t think I can get through that another time” a nervous chuckle escaped him as he rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. That break up reminded him of how much the Dhampir meant to him, losing him had caused so many things occurring in the past month, most of them being quite detrimental to his health even. 

In a way, Han saw Jae as his saving grace, he never knew the term and feeling of wanting something as bad as he wanted to continue his relationship with Jae, so naturally, he wouldn’t want to let go of that. “Of course, when you move in, you’re not telling me you’re about to reject my proposal right?” he teased, and leaned closer, nodding tenderly at what he said, “Okay, don’t worry, Jae, you know I’ll wait for you… take your time.” Truthfully, he couldn’t wait when Jae can finally move in, the idea of wrapping his arms around him and having the Dhampir doing the same with him, it was a small picture of what his safe haven would look like. “Excuse you, you know I’d hear you talk about William Shakespeare for 24 hours if it meant I get to spend my time with you and hear you talk, so can you really blame me on that?” he furrowed his eyebrows and stuck out his tongue in retaliation, where’s the lie in that? 

To Han, 5 years can either be viewed as short or long, depending on how it goes, spending time in his cell for almost 100 years, there were days when he viewed one day to last a lot longer and there were days when he’d feel like they would pass in one second. “You’re an aspiring author aren’t you? You’ll probably be working on your book by then, my genius author” he cooed gleefully and lowered his gaze when Jae send him a look of disapproval because he knew he shouldn’t have said that in the first place, thankfully he had covered it up with it being a joke and nothing more. “You kinda have to live like that when you don’t know what will happen tomorrow,” now that is when he did right by what his statement meant earlier, “I don’t mean to say it to upset you, I just want to be truthful because that’s what it’s going to be like from now on, right? I want to tell you my worries and I want you to see why I said what I said, I want to get through this fear and to do that, I need to talk about it” Han wasn’t kidding when he said he wanted to get better. Hearing that he was important from Jae, it felt like he just got hit by lightning, it made the Celestial part his lips in awe as he continues to gape at the male sitting before him, Jae told him he’s changed his life and he wondered why “I have?” 

As if that wasn’t enough, what came out of Jae’s mouth after that shocked the fallen star so much his grip around the wine glass faltered, prompting him to clear his throat briefly before meeting his eyes, “I… I never thought of that prospect, really…” of course, he wanted a family, but it doesn’t specify much, he only wanted to come home to someone special to him who also sees him the same way he viewed them. “It’s the least I could do you know… you’ve helped me in a lot of ways, Jae. I need to return that too… not as a favor, but more because I want to” that had to be the most sincere thing he’s said the entire month. He really did wish to get better at this, he didn’t want to hide anything from the Dhampir again, he wanted to live this life. 

An amused snicker escaped him when Jae remarked how his heart his tougher than he says, shaking his head softly at the male, “No, really, my heart is fragile, baby. It’s delicate… it’s like a tissue. You only need to tear it once to break it. Only to you, of course. To everyone else, it could be a granite for all I know.” He’s not usually cold but even Han realized that he may come off as timid and someone that kept to himself, which many mistook him to be cold and reserved when in reality, he’s as shy as it can be. Yeon was slowly helping with that whenever he had to go on conferences, and Jae continued to motivate him positively. “I never said you had to be a graceful dancer” he scrunched up his nose and scoffed, waggling his finger in front of him as if he was saying no, “you can step on my feet and fall on me for all I care, it’s just us remember? Better yet just fall on me, then I can say you fell for me again” he teased, giggling softly at the line he used, though the atmosphere can be a bit serious at times, he intended to keep it bright all the same too. 

It wasn’t supposed to be filled with a somber mood, after all. “I know… you never gave up on me even after what I did,” pursing his lips softly, he lets out a heaved sigh and tilted his head to the side and his eyes softened, “I deceived you… when I say it, I realized it sounded so much crueler and harsh, but that’s the reality of it, no? I lied to you, I betrayed your trust, I kept things from you for months, things you had every right to know about, things I should’ve told you in the first place,” his palms started to grow sweaty but he never let go of Jae’s hand, “and it ended up being the cause of my pain and misery. I could’ve stopped it, at least prevented it from happening but I didn’t, and that’s why I suffered. I can’t help but feel like a burden to people around me, even when they say I’m not, it’s just there you know… inside me there’s that room of doubt” Had it not been to his promise not to cry tonight, he was positive he would’ve shed a few tears there, but no, Hanseol wanted to keep his promise to himself.

 “I know you won’t give up on me… you’re far too kind to do that… no no- I mean, you love me so you won’t abandon me” he nodded profusely as if he was trying to convince himself, while averting his gaze to meet Jae’s own warm hues that always looked like he was stretching his arms out for him to fall into that embrace, “right?” Hanseol never intended for it to come off as a squeak but he couldn’t help it, he felt so vulnerable at the moment but the important thing is, he’s coming clean. “I believe you, Jae. I know you won’t leave me, not really.” A few moments later, his eyes curved itself into a crescent-like shape as his lips turned into a grin too, “I feel so much better speaking out. I feel like I’ve been bottling it down for so long, it felt… breezy.” Perfect timing, it was the exact moment when their food was delivered. 

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